cereal_fan Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Hey guys. I have a BF. I'm very much in love with him. We have dated fro 3 months now, heading close to 4. However, on weekends, when we don't see each other, I will ask him, "what are you going to do, any plans?" He will say, "Out..". But he won't say what! He says that almost every weekend we don't see each other! He reassures me he's not drinking or hooking up with girls. Could he be going to clubs? Lol? I know he is not at home either, because his facebook chat is off and he always keeps it on if he is at home. I am just curious and wish he'd tell me :/ It's not as if he doesn't love me, I know he does, shows it in many ways. always cares about my needs over his, which is great but I care about his needs too. He's very giving and so am I, which is what drew us together. Any ideas anyone? Input?
894hjk Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 That would really worry me. maybe he has a job he's embarrassed about Or goes to AA meetings or something? Very odd Follow him one weekend! Problem solved! 1
TylerDurdenn Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Follow him one weekend! Problem solved! Do not do this ^ Sit him down and ask him, just say you may be interested in what he is doing as well. 1
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 I can't tell u what he is doing at the WE but this doesn't sound good to me sadly x
Author cereal_fan Posted March 8, 2014 Author Posted March 8, 2014 That would really worry me. maybe he has a job he's embarrassed about Or goes to AA meetings or something? Very odd Follow him one weekend! Problem solved! Lmao. That made me laugh. Maybe. I think I will ask him some time. He does tell me what time when he will be home though and that he is safe. @tyler: good idea I will do that @heartbrokennewbie : I know I'm very suspicious lol
veggirl Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Tell him, I want to see you this weekend, it's weird that we never see each other on weekends and it makes you look shady. yeah he is prob out w/ other girls, let's be real. do you think it's normal to not see your bf ever on the weekend? it's not, he's most likely cheating. 2
thegreatesthumphrey Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Do you know where he lives? Has he introduced you to his friends? 1
mammasita Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Why would you not see eachother on weekends? When do you see eachother of not then? 2
preraph Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 He's going OUT, like he said. You've been told, so now you have tacitly agreed to a nonexclusive relationship. He's going out with other people, period. He may have a whole other girlfriend or he may just be going out with friends looking for other women or whatever. He didn't even qualify his answer that he was "going out with friends." He said, "out." Clearly he thinks he's said it plain enough. In this case, then you asked him and he tried to tell you it wasn't another woman, but that doesn't mean he isn't looking and meeting women. In this case, you need to listen more to his actions than his words since to me he seems to have told you straight up he's going out but then when cornered, tried to calm you down (just because he's going out doesn't mean he wants to lose you -- he wants to do both). So the fact is he's not seeing you on prime date nights. You have to decide if it's too soon to expect him to commit or not. If I were you, I'd start making other plans on weekends and go "OUT" too! No reason to give any more back than you're getting. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 He's not doing anything you'd be happy about. If it were innocent, you'd have a better idea of what he's up to. Has he got another girlfriend?
Noproblem Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 Give him his space and the amount of freedom he needs. If you start worrying and trying to take away his freedom. I think this will hurt your relationship on the long run. I do think, if you stopped asking him about his whereabouts. That will show your independence, confidence, and trust Then before you knew it, he'll tell you!
somedude81 Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 Have you tried asking him on Monday what he did for the weekend?
babycakees Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 Hey guys. I have a BF. I'm very much in love with him. We have dated fro 3 months now, heading close to 4. However, on weekends, when we don't see each other, I will ask him, "what are you going to do, any plans?" He will say, "Out..". But he won't say what! He says that almost every weekend we don't see each other! He reassures me he's not drinking or hooking up with girls. Could he be going to clubs? Lol? I know he is not at home either, because his facebook chat is off and he always keeps it on if he is at home. I am just curious and wish he'd tell me :/ It's not as if he doesn't love me, I know he does, shows it in many ways. always cares about my needs over his, which is great but I care about his needs too. He's very giving and so am I, which is what drew us together. Any ideas anyone? Input? This guy is plain sketchy. He should fill you in on what he's doing if you are exclusive. By him just saying "out" doesn't really give you any info at all. This seems strange to me. Every guy I have ever been exclusive with (even some that I was casually dating), told me where they'd be on a weekend in which they wouldn't be spending time with me.
Els Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 Are you saying he is never with you on weekends and he doesn't tell you where he goes... OR Are you saying that on the weekends that you aren't with each other (say, one weekend a month), he doesn't tell you where he goes? Big difference there.
Conners Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 90% sure he's out with the guys drinking and picking up. That's just so dodgy he just says "out" I would flip my lid at a guy who I had been with for 3 months for saying that. Stand up to him, ask him what he is doing and don't let him treat you like your feelings aren't important! If he doesn't want to tell you, leave him. If he can't tell you, he's obviously doing something he shouldn't be doing.
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