LazyTee Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Its been 2 weeks since everything happen and I have been going NC, and slept with another girl. I told her this because I respect her and wanted to still be her friend (not because of spite, I was just moving on). We talked and had our laughs and we both did agree that we still felt something for each other even after this. She tried to have sex with me but I told her I couldn't because even after she told me about her sex life I felt a little uneasy in my stomach and was worried I might not get it up cause of it. Today she is going to see me and basically she has been giving hints she wants to do it with me again, I was wondering if I should just do it. Its not going to affect me much, I can understand sleeping with her might cause a spark in my emotions but I know I can deal with it now, should I do it or should I not? My story 2 weeks ago: Heres my short version of my story: Me and my ex-gf broke up due to me not listening most of the time and my jealousy for this one incident where I see her chilling with another guy constantly, i got grumpy and angry and took it out towards her which pushed her away and closer to him. But we decided to remain friends and it was going good, I keep getting hints like I can see and appreciate your improving so I have this tiny little hope one day we would be back together, didn't really bother with it as I was living life for me and not to try prove anything to her. Today I just caught her sleeping with him and was so ANGRY I felt like to get a knife and stab him till I can't recognise his body. Me my gf and the guy talked it out after calming down and basically I know it doesn't consider cheating but I can't help but feel cheated, she felt bad after and i gave her an ultimatum, its me or him. But she wouldn't answer because she doesn't want to lose me since she loves me and she doesn't want to lose him because she likes him. I asked him if he genuinely liked her and he said yes. She also said that she would do it again. So what should I do? Shouldn't I feel like '**** that whore she aint good enough for me, I can find plenty of other girls' but all I feel is envy, angry and VEEEERY angry. But I don't, I feel as though I don't want to lose her. Whats worse is we live at uni together and I'll have to see them everyday. Any advice or anything I can tell her?
Musing Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Are you out of your everloving mind, LazyTee? If I understand you correctly, you are talking about ex sex?? Oh these never turn out good. You say you won't be affected but believe me, if you truly felt you wouldn't be affected you wouldn't be wondering about this. 2 weeks is nothing. I didn't start getting huge gushes of emotions until about 3 weeks post breakup. Seriously I don't think anything good will come of it. If you have to get laid trust me, there are a lot of other females out there ready and willing.
robaday Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Mate by what youve written you didnt get broken up with your jealousy nor your not listening. You got broken up with because you found something was wrong between her and this guy, which it was. The underlying vibe I get from this is that she was close to cheating before the breakup. My advice. RUN AND DO NOT LOOK BACK. This has toxic written all over it. And seriously- rejecting an ex for sex who broke up with you provides you with one major major ego boost and she will find you even more attractive. Dont do it, keep your self control and she will likely lose hers
TigerLilly78 Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Err didn't u also sleep around since you two were broken up? I noticed that was ok but when she did it you rage? You openly admit the breakup was your fault in the 1st place you screwed up let her move on with him and learn from your mistakes..
Author LazyTee Posted March 8, 2014 Author Posted March 8, 2014 I saw her in bed with the same guy naked when I went to his room to drop some stuff for her, it didn't affect me much. I was like meh, I see she moved on and Im moving on too. Imagine this, I was a jealous prick (who likes jealousy when it gets too far?) she got pushed away by me and as comfort slept with him. She still is now sleeping with him. Me thinking about it now doesn't affect me at all like it use to. She came up and spoke, she cried and she said 'i ****ed up' and that she still had feelings for me, she still dreams about me and when she's asleep she pushes him away sometimes, she said she lusted him after the breakup and the sex with him is really good but if so why would she want to have sex with me? The real question is why does she want sex from me? she even offered to give me a bj only and not satisfy her, she could of done it with him. And even if I did decide to have sex with her what other risk may be involved? besides emotion.
robaday Posted March 8, 2014 Posted March 8, 2014 Having had one on off thing with someone in which we broke up a total of six times I feel I can offer some insight on what will happen: youll "f" her. it will feel good for both of you you will both think "that wasnt that bad we can handle it" and do it again a week later then a week later you will do it again so far so good then a week later one of you wont be able to make a meeting. the other will get pissed off and angry. you will retaliate with something about this guy. then she will go to the guy then you will meet up again have sex again then the next week another argument will come up and youll be screaming at each other then one or both will start making each other jealous then you will break up again then a month later you will f increasing increasing until its so dysfunctional you no longer respect each other at all and have destroyed self esteem
Author LazyTee Posted March 8, 2014 Author Posted March 8, 2014 Having had one on off thing with someone in which we broke up a total of six times I feel I can offer some insight on what will happen: youll "f" her. it will feel good for both of you you will both think "that wasnt that bad we can handle it" and do it again a week later then a week later you will do it again so far so good then a week later one of you wont be able to make a meeting. the other will get pissed off and angry. you will retaliate with something about this guy. then she will go to the guy then you will meet up again have sex again then the next week another argument will come up and youll be screaming at each other then one or both will start making each other jealous then you will break up again then a month later you will f increasing increasing until its so dysfunctional you no longer respect each other at all and have destroyed self esteem What if I only have sex with her this one time and one time only? I don't understand why she would want it from me when the guy she's with is bigger, etc. It don't make sense.
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