thegreatesthumphrey Posted March 6, 2014 Posted March 6, 2014 I have a fearful/Avoidant attachment disorder and my BF has a dismissive/avoidant attachment disorder. We have managed to make this into a relationship that has since taken a step back. One year is St. PAttys day. How should I proceed? Obvious answer is working on myself, but that will take time as I am 27. I feel like for me talking about our issues here instead of annoying him with my random crazy would be good for us. Ultimately my crazy I talk myself out of in a day or two and no longer feel so worried.
amaysngrace Posted March 7, 2014 Posted March 7, 2014 It's good that you can identify the problem because it's the first step in fixing it. But then you need to figure out why you have this problem in the first place. What caused you to be afraid of getting close to somebody? And why can't you open up to them? What are you afraid they'll see? 1
lovenotwar Posted March 7, 2014 Posted March 7, 2014 I think you should rethink your problem. Sure, you have this disorder, and so does he. (Are you sure? Did a doctor actually individually diagnose both of you? If not, please don't self-diagnose; it's a really bad idea.) But you don't actually state a problem. What is actually wrong? No matter how screwed the two of you are individually, what really counts is how you are together. It's a good idea to focus on improving yourself, if you have issues holding you back--as long as you're not also neglecting your partner.
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