samat Posted March 6, 2014 Posted March 6, 2014 Hey everyone, I'm in a particularly confusing situation at the moment, trying to figure out where I stand in someone's life. For a little background information, I returned from a holiday in Europe just over a month ago and while I was in Austria, I met a guy. It's a typical cliche'd story, I know. We only knew each other for perhaps a day before I jumped on my flight home, though we exchanged phone numbers and have been chatting ever since. Once I arrived home, the conversations were slow and perhaps a little disappointing though once I mentioned that I would be returning in only 4 months time, our conversations became far more enthusiastic. Each day we would cycle through our sweet conversations which would, more often than not, turn a little raunchy. He mentioned that he only wanted to sleep with me, that he was overly excited about me returning to Europe and that he was afraid I would forget about him and fall for someone in the mean time. I would wake up each morning with a sweet message to read on my phone and would initiate the conversation around fifty percent of the time. Though as of a few days ago, the whole mood has changed. It was strange, it changed almost overnight. When I woke up (after realising he had not contacted me), I messaged him to ask how his day had been and he mentioned that he had received the first printing of his university thesis. Naturally I congratulated him and we discussed our degrees at university, though whenever I attempted to say something sweet, he would cut the conversation by saying something like 'lol' or 'yeah maybe'. Now I know that this is not a huge deal, but when coupled with the fact that his responses have recently been largely one worded and that there is no attempt on his behalf to initiate or maintain a conversation, I have become somewhat concerned. I have messaged a few times asking "what've you been up to today" etc, and he usually just mentions that he hung out at home doing nothing. Realistically, I feel that there really isn't anything wrong though I am sure that some of you have been in a similar situation. I suppose I'm just looking for closure from people on this forum as to whether there definitely sounds like there's something going on or that I'm just being ridiculous. Cheers!
lovenotwar Posted March 7, 2014 Posted March 7, 2014 Long distance relationships basically have this problem. If you don't have some sort of solid physical footing for the relationship, and both of you are attractive people who have options and lives, this is going to happen. It sounds like you don't even really have a formal relationship, that would have any sort of commitment attached to it. I think you need to either decide to seriously pursue this guy, and figure out how to get you and him to be in the same place; or else have a serious talk to him about a long distance relationship, to get you both on the same page. But you can't and shouldn't stress yourself about what's going on with some dude who lives thousands of miles away that you're not really even dating. I know this isn't what you're looking for, but there's no way to divide what's going on with this guy. He seems to be losing interest, but who knows. That isn't the real problem here.
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