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Dumpee's Pros vs. Cons List


monsoon281

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So I've read a bunch of articles on how to get over a breakup and I wanted to share something that has helped me. One article I read recommended making a pros vs. cons list of what your ex gave you. The point of this is to put something physically in front of you to read when you feel like placing your ex on a pedistool. My list is below.

 

Good traits:

Beautiful

Good sense of style

Good taste in music

Comfortable

Good sens of humor

Likes traveling

Values eating/living healthily

 

Bad traits:

Selfish

Controlling

Emotionally unstable

Seeks constant male attention/validation

Daddy issues

Flabby butt

Family problems

Abandonment issues

Not empathetic

Yells / throws fits

Impulsive

Needy

Bad communicator

 

I'm currently five weeks NC, so I also decided to weigh the pros and cons of what I would get if I broke NC, which is below.

 

Remain NC:

Space to heal

Ignorance is bliss

Build self confidence knowing I walked away

 

Contact:

Relieve her guilt

Apologize to her for not "being fun" the last few months of our relationship

Ask her about her life

Tell her my life hasn't changed and I'm still in a rough spot

Ask her why she sent me breadcrumbs at 2 weeks NC right before valentines day

Ask her how her family issues are

Risk being hurt by a negative response or no response

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