LEEVIT2F8 Posted March 5, 2014 Posted March 5, 2014 So my lady has definitely decided to move back. She has secured her apartment, started her job search, and secured/reserved her previous community roles (Board member, committees etc). Last night we had a long phone conversation about a few issues. Some of them while understandable were unsettling to me. First some of her family and friends have expressed concern about our age gap (I'm 40 and she is 26). And my family and close friends have expressed similar concerns to me as well. Our age difference has not been a factor to either of us. But she is feeling a little insulted that her support group is doubting her ability to make good life decisions. I am really not comfortable being in the middle of that conversation especially when they do not know me. All of her friends I have met and our mutual friends have been overwhelmingly supportive. So I think as time goes on that whole situation will resolve itself. But it does make me apprehensive about meeting her family. Which brings me to my next issue. She asked me to spend the weekend out of state with her at a family gathering. Which is a switch in plans as we had something else lined up for that weekend. It took her about a half hour to ask me and she was clearly nervous bringing it up. I know it means a lot to her so I agreed. She really wants me to meet her favorite cousin which she does not get to see very often. And she has promised to shield me from some of the weekend. But I still can't help but feel prejudged and pressured with the whole situation. What can I do to give this the best chance of success? Or do you think the entire thing is a bad idea? Perhaps hold off and meet these people in smaller groups and in more intimate settings?
JungleLover Posted March 5, 2014 Posted March 5, 2014 This all depends on how you truly feel about her and if you see her as having real long term potential. She obviously think you have some potential or you wouldn't have gotten invited. If you try to blow off this major invite from her, it can cause problems that can perpetuate in the relationship and never really go away. Just keep that in mind. There is the potential for some real bonding if you go through with this. I wouldn't get strategic here. Go with the flow and enjoy yourself if you think you can be comfortable around her family. If you don't think you can, definitely do not go. The family would pick up on you being uncomfortable and it won't help your cause. I f you can, meet those folks and enjoy yourself. Allow her to shield you from some of the weekend as promised.
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