Arashi Posted January 24, 2005 Posted January 24, 2005 I met this guy couple months ago on a business trip. Our respective companies are actually competitors. I can feel that there is a big big attraction growing between us but the problem is that he is living at the other side of the country. Since then, we have been IM or call each other couple times aweek, we have even met each other again during his business trip in my city. We made promise not to talk about work while we are together....I think we do like each other very much and enjoyed spending time together. There is definitely a very strong connection. Our goal right now is to know each other better first. Besides, it is sort of a long distance relationship, we have almost 10 years in age difference and he is divorced and has kids. He is not ready to move to anywhere and I am not ready to give up my life style and job neither. My question is what should I do if I really fall in love with him? Since I don t believe that long distance relationship would work out (at least for me)....However, day after day, my feeling for him has been growing; I really enjoy our phone conversation and those rare face to face moments together. In the same time, I am afraid to get myself into a heart breaking situation in which I will suffer more than I can handle. I can feel that things are getting blurry and confusing. On the one hand, my heart wants me to explore further this "special" relationship but on the other hand, I am afraid that I will have to make a choice some days in the future... that I have to choose between him and my career + the way of life that I love. What would you do if you were me???
Hund1976 Posted January 24, 2005 Posted January 24, 2005 I would just go with the flow and see what happens in the future. There are probably three things that could happen. You'll get to know him better and decide you're not that into him and that will be that. You'll decide he's the man of your dreams and maybe then your career and lifestyle won't seem that important to you. Or you might wind up torn and having to make a tough decision. But if there's a chance you could be really happy with this guy I wouldn't give it up just because at the present moment you think your career is the most important thing in your life. When your 70 years old you might be a lot happier sitting down to Thanksgiving dinner with your husband, children and grandchildren and reflecting on the life you had with them all the last 50 years then sitting on a park bench alone thinking about the career you had for the last 50 years.
moimeme Posted January 24, 2005 Posted January 24, 2005 I have seen people who devoted their hearts and souls to a company for thirty years get let go. Jobs, careers, companies, and organizations will not be faithful to you and very few will reward your loyalty. However, if you are adamant that your job and way of life are vital to your existence, then cut off this relationship now because it's highly likely that you will have to make a choice. What would I do? Well, I'm not on a specific career path that I'm devoted to, but even if I were, I would choose love over career for the reasons I gave above. Not a lot of people die regretting career moves they didn't make, I suspect.
alphamale Posted January 24, 2005 Posted January 24, 2005 Originally posted by Arashi Besides, it is sort of a long distance relationship, we have almost 10 years in age difference and he is divorced and has kids. chances are fairly high that he is still married. proceed w/ caution.
Recommended Posts