Cheating wife 12 years

[mikek2131]

How do you live with someone who cheated on you for over 10 years.

Edited March 1, 2014 by mikek2131

[MrMeh]

Pfff...I believe her detachment. I mean it was just 12 years. Joking aside, it's nearly impossible unless you go through IC then MC. Even then, most would recommend moving on and possibly building finding a better partner who is more compatible.

[aliveagain]

Why would you want to, you were only part time to her. How can she ever make it up to you? Knowing about the extent of her infidelity is just another part of the sh*t sandwich she's forcing you to eat. What do you want? Staying for the kids or because it's comfortable are all the wrong reason's for staying. Can you live with the fact she was another mans plaything for the last 10 years? Can you live with the fact your marriage to her was a lie, a lie she told you everyday of last decade? Decide what you want for yourself first without her influence, than act. Talk to a lawyer regardless, you need to know your rights and you need to protect your children if you have any. I think you can do better than her, how does she just stop, infidelity is the biggest part of her life. You just found out what she and O/M have known for most of your marriage. They planned afternoons, trips, dinners, rendezvous, they confided with each other against you, you were't allowed to share in their secret, you were their enemy for 10 years.

[No Limit]

Counter question:

 

Why would you want to be with someone who has so little respect for you that he betrays you for 12 years? The ability of people to love someone is amazing, truly, but the ability of others taking advantage of this is leaving me speechless. Why? Why would you rather live a lie?

[TaraMaiden]

How do you live with someone who cheated on you for over 10 years.

 

You don't.

 

You end it, and kick her to the kerb.

 

Right now.

[soccerrprp]

How do you live with someone who cheated on you for over 10 years.

 

Only if you're insane or perpetually medicated to the point where you don't know the difference between reality and fantasy.

 

YOU DON'T.

[ExpatInItaly]

I wouldn't live with someone who cheated for over 10 years.

[road]

How do you live with someone who cheated on you for over 10 years.

 

 

 

 

 

How did you find out?

 

 

How long have you been married?

 

 

Do you have kids?

[William]

Thread starter, if you wish to participate in our forums on this topic, providing a more complete description of your marital issues is paramount. Also, since you are married and your spouse apparently is, or was, in an affair, this thread is relocated to our Infidelity forum. Please continue!

[TaraMaiden]

Thanks William; I was going to point out that the OP posted then disappeared.... should the thread be 'suspended'....? Maybe it's too soon for that, but you kind of beat me to the drum.....

 

[michelangelo]

some of us do not know the extent of the betrayal and have a spouse who cheated for years. Finding that out years after the fact can be so traumatizing that any kind of reaction is stuffed in a disturbed self preservation. As for me? I finally left that lying cheat. But it took me several years to process the anger and hurt before i could do it. Life events got in the way too. Job losses, kid's health crisis, etc.

 

But ultimately, it was the best thing I could do.

 

Those of you who are bewildered that anyone could stay with a long-time cheater may not have experienced that type of deception, not encountered the reaction.

 

Time slips by in a haze of pain and depression. But eventually a reaction can happen, for the better.

Edited March 3, 2014 by michelangelo

[Chi townD]

Blah...Hit and run thread. Might as well lock it up.

[Bryanp]

If the roles were reversed and she cheated on you for 12 years and put your health at risk for STD's; would she stay with you? If you do not respect yourself then who will because she sure doesn't.

[BeholdtheMan]

How do you live with someone who cheated on you for over 10 years.

 

You don't?

[kalimata]

Mike: please provide more details so that we can help.

 

.........................Kali

[William]

Thread starter logged out after making this post and hasn't returned so we'll close it up. They can alert us if/when they return and wish to add/solicit more content. Thanks for your participation!