ldrgirl000 Posted March 1, 2014 Posted March 1, 2014 Im 25. I am a genuine nice person. I compromise a lot, give in and try to please others people. But up to a point I cannot take it anymore. People really just bully me now. My anger gets worse and my relationship with my family and friends all fall apart. I broke up with my bf after 2 years. My cousin advised me to spend some time alone to balance everything. He was right, and I spent time on my hobbies and figure things out. During 5 months of 'healing', I wanted to see some new guys, but nothing works out. Some of them are jerks, some are nice but not interested. I came to my friends, but I end up fighting with my closest friend. She is happy in love and made some hurtful joke about me being single until 40 taking care of her babies. I took it really bad and we end up arguing about every other time I tried to laugh along with her hurtful jokes. She would always say something really mean and 'just kidding, why u have to take it so serious, don't be obsessive about love then you will find it funny'. Then it's me who is too sensitive and she is the funny one. We haven't talked since. Then it's my father who is never happy with me. He used to be abusive and hit me when I was a kid. We tried to make peace but it just doesn't work. People accuse me of being angry, stubborn, sensitive, dramatic. But for first time, I am so sure I was right and they are wrong. As, many of my friends get married or are busy with something, I find myself with my hobbies and work. Actually it's not that bad but it's like having so many people around but I am still alone. As sad as it sounds, I'm not ready to talk to my best friend yet. But now, I am just alone, not depressed but just alone. I want something I'm not really sure, don't know how to get it. I want new friends but I'm not exactly having fun going out, I cant entertain people now.
matt_1987 Posted March 1, 2014 Posted March 1, 2014 (edited) Im 25. I am a genuine nice person. I compromise a lot, give in and try to please others people. But up to a point I cannot take it anymore. People really just bully me now. My anger gets worse and my relationship with my family and friends all fall apart. I broke up with my bf after 2 years. My cousin advised me to spend some time alone to balance everything. He was right, and I spent time on my hobbies and figure things out. During 5 months of 'healing', I wanted to see some new guys, but nothing works out. Some of them are jerks, some are nice but not interested. I came to my friends, but I end up fighting with my closest friend. She is happy in love and made some hurtful joke about me being single until 40 taking care of her babies. I took it really bad and we end up arguing about every other time I tried to laugh along with her hurtful jokes. She would always say something really mean and 'just kidding, why u have to take it so serious, don't be obsessive about love then you will find it funny'. Then it's me who is too sensitive and she is the funny one. We haven't talked since. Then it's my father who is never happy with me. He used to be abusive and hit me when I was a kid. We tried to make peace but it just doesn't work. People accuse me of being angry, stubborn, sensitive, dramatic. But for first time, I am so sure I was right and they are wrong. As, many of my friends get married or are busy with something, I find myself with my hobbies and work. Actually it's not that bad but it's like having so many people around but I am still alone. As sad as it sounds, I'm not ready to talk to my best friend yet. But now, I am just alone, not depressed but just alone. I want something I'm not really sure, don't know how to get it. I want new friends but I'm not exactly having fun going out, I cant entertain people now. I feel your pain through the screen, and believe me, for as little as it may matter to you, you are not alone. whoever you are, wherever you are now, I am with you in this moment of hardship. please take a moment to think about this: can you be happy with someone if you are not happy with yourself? no. can you allow someone else that is not you take your smile and your serenity away? no. is this attitude of yours going to take you to a better place of mind&body wellness? no. understand that you and you only have the power to heal and be happy about yourself and your life. when you put your happiness in someone else's hands, it's like giving your car to somebody who does not hold a driver's license. you have to drive together, and respect each other's place. NEVER STOP BELIEVING! heal your wounds but have a target: your own weel being. and then, go out there and find somebody who can enjoy the beatiful person you are now. "Miracles only happen if you believe in miracles" Paulo Coelho (read his book "manual of the warrior of the light if you havent yet", comes with some soul-healing words) be strong. you will make it. we all will. the only thing we have to do is to believe. Edited March 1, 2014 by matt_1987
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