How much communication with someone your dating? Ignoring is it ever okay?

[Thegreatestthing]

I seem to not be that good at understanding how much communication etc and it keeps causing problems.

 

Example I speak to the guy I'm dating everyday through text etc.

 

anyway I was really busy with a study thing and ignored his texts (he was texting a lot more than usual like a lot) even though I really wanted to talk to him and was in a really loved up mood.

 

I did say I was doing something but not whSt ,and he kept messaging which I stupidly ignored.

 

when I finally replied like three or four hours later when I was finished and explained ,the mood was really sour and shifted and he was already busy making dinner etc not the same happy mood.

 

And I really want to avoid that,Should I have explained before not after that I was busy but would talk to him in a few hours, I didn't know how long I'd be.Rather than ignoring?? How much contact is normal everyday ??

Etc

Edited February 27, 2014 by Thegreatestthing

[staryeyes]

My boyfriend likes to keep in constant contact thru text all day. If I don't answer a text or two because I am busy he starts to panic and thinks something has happened. I finally got to the point that if I knew I was going to be busy with something I would alert him ahead of time so he would neither get panicked or upset. It wasent that I would ignore his texts but sometime you just get wrapped up in what your doing. Letting him know before hand just saved us a lot of unnecessary bickering .

Hope that helps

[pickflicker]

In the initial stages, I let the guy set the pace. If he texts me every day, he texts me every day. If he texts me every few days, that's fine too.

 

He sets the pace.

 

You don't have to apologise for not responding to a text. I did it the other week - didn't get back to a guy until nearly 24 hours after text was sent. Reason? I was as sick as a dog and had turned my phone off because I wanted to sleep and not be disturbed. He was cool with it.

 

If your guy's fragile ego is hurt by this - too bad. The phone is there for your convenience, not anyone else's.

[Conners]

I only get pissy if a guy doesn't text me back and he's clearly on facebook/instagram/snap chat all day.

 

I don't let them know i'm pissed otherwise you start to look like a clinger but it does annoy me.

 

My ex was particularly hopeless with his phone so I decided to give him a taste of his own medicine and not reply for 24 hours.

During that time he sent 3-4 msgs finally ending with a FB message asking if he had done something wrong. I said no I just couldn't be bothered checking my phone since yours is dead half the time anyway.

 

Miraculously his text messaging and communication skills improved after that.

[Gaeta]

OP, how would you like to be treated? Would you like to be ignored then be explained things 4 hours later OR you'd like the person to have enough consideration for you and explains he's busy and will be back later.

 

Ignoring is rude and inconsiderate.

[d0nnivain]

You are allowed to have boundaries & a life. If you were studying that had to be your focus. After the 1st text you could have clarified & said, studying I'll call you back later. You probably should have after the 2nd text. But now that you have had this issue explain that if you don't text back instantly you are probably busy studying. If that doesn't appease him, he may not have enough respect for your priorities.

 

 

I have a busy day / schedule. I rarely text people back instantly, especially if it's social. At most they'll get a "later".

[Joaquin]

He is insecure with you.

 

You guys need to fix that or there will be a blowout sooner or latter.