changeup2014 Posted February 27, 2014 Posted February 27, 2014 Some thoughts & reconfirmation needed. I've been dating a guy for about 2 weeks. During this time we've seen each other 4 times & keep in touch by text message regularly. Early on he started making comments about how his parents were going to really like me & comments about me meeting them. I always responded positively with saying it will be nice to meet them, but never acted overly eager and at no time have I ever asked to meet them. I had even told him tht it was important that when it happens it's at a time when hes comfortable with it. I probably should also mention I suffer from anxiety so I tend to question & over analyze things more than the average person. Today I asked him how he felt things were going & if he was ok with the pace in which things were going. He said he was happy with things, but thought maybe we could slow it down just a little. When I asked specifically what he wanted to slow down he responded with meeting his family. I was a little taken aback and even told him I'd told him that it should not happen until he's ready and comfortable and tht I'm certainly in no rush. I asked him if he was ok with everything else and more specifically how often we're seeing each other & his response was yes he is happy & having fun & to not stop seeing him. Heres my hang up, I continue to analyze this wondering if he really did tell me all there is to what he was talking about slowing down. Would he have told me more if there was indeed more? I told him communication is big for me & he agreed. I hate that I do this, I always tend to over analyze everything & I know that has to do with my anxiety. He's not aware of my anxiety, but I plan to let him know about it. So do you think if there were more things concerning him he would have shared them with me since he shared what he did or is there a possibility he's holding back from telling me everything & I'm left to figure it out on my own? Any thoughts and advise is appreciated.
mammasita Posted February 27, 2014 Posted February 27, 2014 I think you need to take a deeeep breath and relax. It's been two weeks. It's way too early to know everything there is to know and for him to even begin to let you know everything. That said, I'm sure there are a ton of things he hasn't shared with you. Prime example, you haven't let him know about your anxiety. I know this is much easier said than done, but seriously.....relax and let the relationship flow.
Author changeup2014 Posted February 27, 2014 Author Posted February 27, 2014 (edited) Thank you so much, I sincerely appreciate your candidness & I completly agree with you, I do need to go with the flow & relax more. Do you think now is an ok time to let him know about my anxiety. I'd rather him know more about me than what's just on the surface. I feel comfortable letting him know, so I am ok with it. I'd rather him know now than later. Edited February 27, 2014 by changeup2014
OhThatGirl Posted February 27, 2014 Posted February 27, 2014 I'm not sure you'll need to tell him. Two weeks into dating the guy you asked if he was comfortable with the pace. That's a sign of high anxiety if I've ever seen one. But really though. Don't tell him about all your issues yet. Just get to know him.
Assasda Posted February 27, 2014 Posted February 27, 2014 Goodness Gracious. Just 2 weeks. Please tell the guy that you have anxiety, because asking about "pace" at this point is a bit nuts.
Author changeup2014 Posted February 27, 2014 Author Posted February 27, 2014 I don't think there's anything wrong with sharing things about yourself, early on or not. I did share with him that I suffer from anxiety & he shared with me that he does too. After discussing what we both do to try & cope, I.e medication taken he proceeded to ask me "what the heck do you worry so much about". Not exactly the question I was expecting or even how I would expect it would be asked if he was wondering. I'm not trying to read I to it too much, but I am. Honestly I was offended by the question & especially coming from someone who suffers from the same thing. After 2 weeks it's too early to be concerned about things like this. The response I received was not exactly one I was expecting & one that won't make me feel too comfortable sharing other personal things about me. I
Author changeup2014 Posted February 27, 2014 Author Posted February 27, 2014 (edited) jjjjjjjjjj Edited February 27, 2014 by changeup2014
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