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Flaking without alternative Day


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Posted

I'm pissed off. A guy whom I liked so much flaked on the day of our date. He said he got called in for work. So i asked "what about thursday"? He told me he had family business.

 

I told him "alright let me know whenever you want to. " Should i back off now? I'm very annoyed. Did he lose interest since he offered NO alternative day?

 

I really liked this one. I was falling in love..

 

Anything i should say to reel him back in and make him want to see me? UGH

Posted

Anytime something came up (which is rarely) if I have interest, i'll always ask to reschedule.

 

It's same for me in a girl's case. If she flakes on me with a valid excuse AND offers to reschedule, no problem. Things DO come up. But if she falkes and does not even offer a new day, then I move on.

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Posted
I'm pissed off. A guy whom I liked so much flaked on the day of our date. He said he got called in for work. So i asked "what about thursday"? He told me he had family business.

 

I told him "alright let me know whenever you want to. " Should i back off now? I'm very annoyed. Did he lose interest since he offered NO alternative day?

 

I really liked this one. I was falling in love..

 

Anything i should say to reel him back in and make him want to see me? UGH

 

Move on. You shouldn't have to do tricks and backflips to keep someone interested. If he was interested in you he would follow up. Be happy it didn't go any further. Ball is in his court don't ask him out again.

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Posted (edited)

I see. Thanks.

 

Why just why. I liked this guy too much. He made me so happy, I was really sad and unhappy in these past few months until I met him. He was perfect to me. He was so decent, respectful and career-oriented. LOYAL too.

 

Just writing this, I feel like crying. Oh well..I'll go NC and try again. Let's see if he messages me.

 

You're right, he's too much of a good guy to try any tricks.

 

Btw he told me his excuse and ended it with "baby". Does that mean anything? He even said "sweetie" when he messaged me this morning?

 

I'm really down now :(

Edited by inkheart
Posted

If he texted you today, you are still good. Carry on as ususal, but don't bring up when the next date is, let him do that.

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Posted

Alright thanks. What if he tries to have a conversation with me? I refrained from revealing personal details about myself because i want to meet and get to know each other in PERSON. I hate texting and becoming someone's text buddy.

 

 

Do i ignore him or will that push him away? Keep in mind he is a mentally healthy guy, very normal.

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Posted

****UPDATE - he said this just now "I wanted to see you too. I'll make it up to you where ever you want"

 

What is the best way to get a date from this?

Posted

That shows intention and he might feel that having flaked, he should give you the choice of days.

 

So give him the benefit of the doubt one more time and tell him you're free on X day. If he can't do it, then say this: "okay, well it would be nice to see you too. But you seem to be busier than I am, so when you have an idea of when you'll be free, get back in touch and we'll set something up."

 

Make it painfully clear the ball is in his court. If he texts and is in touch, but never comes back with a specific date, then he's letting you down easy. And in that case, then just drift away and find someone else to spend time with.

 

If he wants to see you, he'll make it happen. Hard lesson in life, but people do what they want to do. Generally, all thigns being equal, if they're not doing something, it's because they don't want to.

Posted

Please don't get so wrapped up in a guy you have never met in person! People lie all the time and will say anything to get what they want. Watch his ACTIONS not words! So far he hasn't followed through. Your getting too wrapped up before even seeing this guy face to face.

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