Too Soon?

[Nanners]

I've been seeing this girl for a little over a month now. Things have been going great. We have went on 5 dates, we talk to each other non stop, and I even introduced her to my parents a week ago.

 

We do the typical couple stuff like hold hands in public, greet each other with a hello hug, and we recently started doing good night kisses. So like I've said things are going great or so I thought.

 

I was talking to a friend a couple days ago and in the conversation I labeled the girl I'm seeing my girlfriend. My friend asked if she knew I was calling her that and it hit me I hadn't asked her.

 

So I decided I was going to ask her on our movie date, it was at her house, which was last night. We were sitting on the couch cuddling and I felt it was the right time to ask. I gave her a mushy story about how we first met and then I asked if it was okay to call her my girlfriend.

 

Her reaction sank my heart. She sat up and nodded her head fast. When I asked if everything was okay she said yeah and started to rock on the couch, biting her lower lip and avoiding eye contact with me. I decided to ask how she viewed me. She just repeated that she didn't know. When she would say I don't know she would do numerous things like: smile, blush, cover her face with her hands, and play with her hair.

 

I decided to tell her that I didn't want her to make a decision right then. I told her I was a patient guy and that I would wait for her. She smiled and thanked me and went back to cuddling with me.

 

Everything went back to normal. She went back to her playful flirtatiousness by hitting me with her pillows and playfully smacking my face with a open hand. After the movie ended she decided we should find "our" song. After a few hours we found one.

 

At the end of the night I gave her a good night kiss and went home more confused than I have ever been.

 

I was prepping myself this morning for a breakup call or something but literally everything is back to normal. She still acting the same and still flirts with me. She even told me I'm cute when I look tired today, stayed up past 1 am with her had to be at work at 8 so I am a little tired lol.

 

Its just confusing to me. I mean we hug, kiss, hold hands, cuddle, go out with each other, and now we even have a song. Why doesn't she want to label me as her boyfriend? Is it too soon to ask that when we've only known each other for a little over a month?

Edited February 26, 2014 by Nanners

[TheNewMe2014]

Good question. I'd add to that - particularly to the woman...do labels matter?

 

I'm almost at the point of my life that I don't care what it's called if you are getting out of the relationship what you want. Granted, labeling it probably articulates if you and her have the same view. As well, how you deal with discussing her with others.

 

I'm actually at a loss myself...curious to what others say.

 

As for her - it sounds like she's more nervous or excited than anything else. I wouldn't worry about it if everything is back to normal.

[MidwestUSA]

Since she went back to being playful, I wouldn't worry about it. Obviously you caught her off guard. She needs time to digest it. You did right telling her you'd be patient; it probably relieved some of her anxiety.

No, it wasn't too soon to ask. Just give her time, it sounds as if all is going well!

[Phantom888]

How old are you 2? Depends on what stage in life you are. If you are young (20), it's a bit soon. But love is irrational, as they say. There are no rules. The important thing is that you two want the same things in a relationship.

[d0nnivain]

Some people get hung up on labels . . . both ways, they want ones that they aren't getting or get freaked when called by one.

 

 

Keep behaving the same way & don't talk about the labels for a while. Revisit the issue in a few months when the "pressure" is off.