Cam7 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 So many girls I've met seem to have exes that are completely different to myself. I have a Bachelor's degree in a science and tech field, white collar office job with a decent pay packet, can spell and use grammar, sensitive, not athletic or muscular but healthy, makes sound financial decisions, has owned property and generally "nice" to a point. These guys tend to be, muscular, high school at best, smoke, binge drink, drive trashy hoon cars, swear all the time and can't spell to save their lives, act like douchebags, spend all their money on crap and have no future prospects. I'm not saying I'm intimidated by such people, I'm still a fun, funny and flirtatious sort of person. I'm also just as outgoing and have just as many friends. From what I can see from my experiences, these girls seem like the kind that would rather date a but in reality only date b. I know this is a massive generalization but it feels like I've ended up in the friendzone not because of actions but because I don't fit into this category. Am I just dating the wrong girls? Is it ever possible to convince someone to give something else a go or perhaps this is just an age thing?
Larry56 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Women generally find these types more "Exciting" than "Grounded" types like yourself (I would consider myself closer to you). You are probably going for the wrong types of Women, cause seriously - there is no point in putting on an ACT. You have to be REAL. If you are boring, then be the most exciting boring person you can be. Always put your best foot forward, but just remember, you can't *fake* trying to impress these Women by trying to act like a Douchebag (who are generally unreliable and will make these girls lives miserable in the end). but I can't blame you. The more outgoing ones are sadly, more physically appealing than the grounded types.
Larry56 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 I will also add that, the Douchebags tend to make quick decisions which results in them winning a lot more than someone who is analytically and takes his time about things.
pickflicker Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 My type always, forever and ever, will be tall, intense, emotional, creative, driven types who are obsessed with music. I might not necessarily end up with that kind of person, but it doesn't change my type.
Author Cam7 Posted February 26, 2014 Author Posted February 26, 2014 That's the thing, I consider myself an sociable and outgoing person. No girl has ever considered me to be "boring". I've even asked a couple, they usually laugh and think I'm joking. In my opinion by body is my only weakness.
Conners Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 physically.. i don't think my type will ever change. I look back at my ex's/flings whatever.. 90% of them had similar physical traits. Messy blonde hair and blue eyes. That is my weakness! Personality - I NEED someone with a good sense of humor that can make me laugh.. i'd say that is the only pre-requisite.
Author Cam7 Posted February 26, 2014 Author Posted February 26, 2014 My type always, forever and ever, will be tall, intense, emotional, creative, driven types who are obsessed with music. I might not necessarily end up with that kind of person, but it doesn't change my type. What's tall? 6'+?
pickflicker Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 What's tall? 6'+? Taller than me. I'm 5'9".
David87 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Taller than me. I'm 5'9". Pickflicker you happen to be just my type )
Larry56 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 That's the thing, I consider myself an sociable and outgoing person. No girl has ever considered me to be "boring". I've even asked a couple, they usually laugh and think I'm joking. In my opinion by body is my only weakness. Why do you think that?
Author Cam7 Posted February 26, 2014 Author Posted February 26, 2014 So answer this? Why would girls that sound like A go after guys that sound like B? This is my issue, smart successful women passing me off. I certainly don't lack the personality. Also I'm 6' so I'm not short lol.
David87 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Why do you think that? Maybe he has a couple of extra pounds.
Larry56 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 No your body has nothing to do with it. Yes some Women prefer tall guys because they don't want to feel like amazonians. However, every Girl I've ever been with has been taller than me I am 5'3 My first girlfriend when I was 18 was a thin 5'11 Model... How do you explain that? Okay you can't. But I will - I was always REAL, and it worked. I made my girlfriends feel good about themselves and about me. That's all there is to it.
Author Cam7 Posted February 26, 2014 Author Posted February 26, 2014 Maybe he has a couple of extra pounds. Nope, just lack the extra pounds of muscle, that said I am a recovered fatass. Maybe I have phantom fat?
Larry56 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Well then, maybe you are not getting your point across when you approach these women, if you act like a friend, then they will consider you a friend. If you act like your sexually interested from the get-go, they know what you want. 1
David87 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Nope, just lack the extra pounds of muscle, that said I am a recovered fatass. Maybe I have phantom fat? No dude, there's nothing wrong with how you look, you just have to make women fell safe when they are with you, make them feel good, throw in a compliment or two, make them laugh and you will be ok. 1
David87 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Well then, maybe you are not getting your point across when you approach these women, if you act like a friend, then they will consider you a friend. If you act like your sexually interested from the get-go, they know what you want. I couldn't agree more, never treat them like a friend. Thats a big no no .
pickflicker Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Pickflicker you happen to be just my type ) The position of LS crush had already been taken, sorry. :-P
David87 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 The position of LS crush had already been taken, sorry. :-P That's not a problem because I'm not jealous ) I'm joking 1
isisisweeping Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Guys I've dated have all been very smart and geeky. Physically, my long term relationships have been very tall (6'1 to 6'5) brunettes but who I have dated or been attracted to has a huuuuuge range. The personality is what really gets me. I don't often see smart girls dating the sort of guys you mentioned.
mammasita Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 My "type" has absolutely changed......dramatically. I think that comes with maturity though. My thought is that if a 23 year old woman and a 35 year old woman with a child are both going after that guy who likes to party all the time - the 35 year old is doing it wrong. 1
LEEVIT2F8 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 If you don't like your body then go work out! Lots of hotties at the gym my friend. Plus you get in better shape, have more energy, and become healthier. There is really nothing to lose. Guys get friend zoned because they do not bring enough sexuality to the equation. Sense of humor, confidence, intelligence, ambition, and good looks open a lot of doors. But if you can not bring the sexual tension they will lose interest fast.
newmoon Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 (edited) physically i think the type can change into anything because mature women should be seeking qualities and not always looks. not every 6 foot guy with brown hair and green eyes will be thoughtful, so you have to at least be willing to look at other 'types' to get what you want. if you're sticking too close to a type you're probably giving up a lot of personality traits that are compatible just to stick w/a certain look you like. if a new guy looks dramatically different than a ex - or seems to not have as much as the ex in terms of achievement - he probably has some amazing personality characteristics that you wouldn't see from the outside. Edited February 26, 2014 by newmoon
kodakgirl Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 I'd say yes, you are probably dating the wrong girls. I know plenty of great young women (including myself) whose 'type' is close to your a) and would never go near a b) with a ten foot pole. You might want to consider your own type and/or where you are meeting women. Most of us do have types, and while I think they can change, usually it is because of a) meeting a really special person who blows you away, who isn't your usual type or b) a conscious effort when we realize our type is bad for us. I don't think you can convince someone to change types, no matter how great you are-- they either have to feel you're the exception or come to their own realizations. It sounds like you have a good sense of self and self-worth-- keep that up and maybe try out new things, there will be girls on your life who that appeals to!
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