LaylaSings Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Absolutely he said that to me, and I can understand how most women could look back later and assume he must have been lying but I know it to be true from his wife. They do not have a sexless marriage, just very seldom.. They can easily go weeks at a time, more than a month is not uncommon. When they do have sex, he says it's very robotic and he has to be very careful how he approaches her. She tells me she doesn't care if she ever has sex again.. He does not know she has told me that. 1
BlueBobby Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 I'm the MM. I didn't even have to tell my girl the because we both knew all about each other's sex lives, our families are close and we get drunk and discuss sex a lot! Lol we both knew exactly the situation we were going into. I did tell her we still have sex just hardly ever. And that's the truth. 1
Lady2163 Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 It's been very tasteful when it is discussed. Sex is seldom, but does happen. Right now both are having over age 50 issues in the bedroom. It is very...vanilla. I believe him. He is very vanilla. 1
Author Popsicle Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 Right now both are having over age 50 issues in the bedroom. Please forgive my ignorance, but what is "over age 50 issues"?
Lady2163 Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Please forgive my ignorance, but what is "over age 50 issues"? Menopause and failure to lubricate for her Failure to achieve complete erections for him No lubrication, not hard enough to penetrate, sex gets kind of tough. Sex is not something discussed. Two sentences could fix both problems and neither can or will say them.
nais Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Menopause and failure to lubricate for her Failure to achieve complete erections for him No lubrication, not hard enough to penetrate, sex gets kind of tough. Sex is not something discussed. Two sentences could fix both problems and neither can or will say them. What can fix them?
Lady2163 Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 What can fix them? Honey, I'd like to buy some KY for us. Honey, I'm getting older, I need more stimulation than when I was 25. Touch my penis, please. Whoops....three sentences...
Nattie Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Nope. We're both very honest about the fact that we still have sex with our spouses, not on a very regular basis, but it still happens. This is going to sound AWFUL, and it is, but one time he was telling me that it was difficult for him because there's no physical attraction, and I told him that he had to put that aside and sleep with her so she doesn't get suspicious. 2
Goodbye Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Yes, sexless. And that they weren't living together...he was staying at their vacation home. Or on the couch when he'd go home to be with his son. I seriously doubt any of it. Then again, I was in a sexless marriage for a while. So, they do exist. 1
Mrs.Scarlet Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Or hardly had sex with his wife? Yes he told me the would never had sex which I would later find out was a lie. 1
glow worm Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Nope. We're both very honest about the fact that we still have sex with our spouses, not on a very regular basis, but it still happens. This is going to sound AWFUL, and it is, but one time he was telling me that it was difficult for him because there's no physical attraction, and I told him that he had to put that aside and sleep with her so she doesn't get suspicious. This is almost exactly my situation, except I am a single OW. My CM has never tried to hide from me that he does have sex with his partner (not that we talk about it lots, but he's been honest with that.) Well anyway, a few months ago, he told me that as his relationship with me has deepened over the years, he has gradually lost interest in having sex with her. I essentially told him the same thing as Nattie, that if he intends to stay in a relationship with her, he needs to find a way to have sex with her to maintain their relationship and also keep her from suspecting him and trying to dig up clues. 1
Daisy2013 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Yes, he said sex was rare to none. I used to tell him maybe he'd go home and "get lucky," and he'd say "no." He claimed not even on their anniversary, and brought up several times how during their 2 week vacation 2 years ago, he got it once, and he was was annoyed because he thought them being alone together in different hotels would bring some spark. He came home telling me the romance was gone, but.... Whether it's true or not, it wasn't my concern. I didn't let it bother me. He would bring it up, not me. Sometimes I could tell it had "been a while" for him, others not so much, and I didn't ask. His problem. I'm in a sexless M, so if I were to ever say it, I'm not lying. 1
wanting more Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 We never talked about it. I was still having sex at home with a SO I didn't even like very much so why wouldn't he be having sex with his wife?? He used to try and ask subtle questions about my sex life but I never discussed it 1
SugarHibiscus Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 My OM and I were just talking about this a couple of hours ago. We're honest about our active "other" sex life, but the subject rarely comes up. Why? It makes us jealous in a way that we have no right to be. I am not truly his and vice versa. JMO. 1
cocorico Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Or hardly had sex with his wife? Nope - I worked that out for myself, from the evidence. 1
MissBee Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Or hardly had sex with his wife? No, he didn't say it or try to imply it. 1
Silly_Girl Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 Yes he did. And he was telling the truth. 1
Author Popsicle Posted February 28, 2014 Author Posted February 28, 2014 Nope - I worked that out for myself, from the evidence. If it's not too personal, what was the evidence?
NotOW35 Posted February 28, 2014 Posted February 28, 2014 Mine has been separated from his W for a while now. He said their marriage was sexless for a long time before she filed for divorce. He also said he thinks she may have had a lesbian relationship with one of her friends, so this may be the root of a lot of their "sexless" problems. I can tell you from our relationship...it is hard to imagine him in a sexless relationship.
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