AnyaNova Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Hope, thou art a cruel female dog! Just saying. Sorry there really isn't a point to this thread other than that and that I hurt tonigh. On the one hand it probably is a bit of a victory because it isn't affecting my self esteem. But the withdrawal of hope and back to the usual are not fun either. I hurt! Feel free to join in wih your own comments. :-) 1
Redhawkk Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Gee Anya, I am soooo there right now. I actually, I just posted something yesterday about the feeling of false hope I have with my Ex of 3 weeks...it truly, truly...blows! I can empathize 100%, especially with hope. Cause I'm still at the stage where I think I'll never find anybody else and lead a dreadful solitary life. I'm slowly weening myself into realizing that I probably will never be with my EX again. It hurst to think that. I'm bummed out too. I hurt too dear friend...I hurt
MixedMinh Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 LoveShack party? I'm in. I'm hurting pretty bad too. Ex is bombarding me with texts and calls.. telling my friends that she needs to talk to me. Making it so hard to stay NC! I feel more in power lately though. Feels like I am being the bigger person. I seem to feel happier when I help other people, it just sucks when the people I help end up taking advantage of me. Group hug? ((HUG))
Redhawkk Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 *HUG*! damn this wretched feeling, am I right? I'm glad I don't get breadcrumbs, if anything I'm the sap who sends them....although I haven't, in a week at least I generally have good days, I don't know why lately I haven't been? I'm so happy you help others, I do the same. heartbreak is no reason to get cold on others 3
Tripz Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 LoveShack party? I'm in. I'm hurting pretty bad too. Ex is bombarding me with texts and calls.. telling my friends that she needs to talk to me. Making it so hard to stay NC! I feel more in power lately though. Feels like I am being the bigger person. I seem to feel happier when I help other people, it just sucks when the people I help end up taking advantage of me. Group hug? ((HUG)) Dang, bro...That NC seems to really be working in your case!
Never Again Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Hope is a menace. Hope kept me from healing for the first 2 months. Hope resurged after we danced two months after that. Hope is denial. 3
Author AnyaNova Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 Hope is a menace. Hope kept me from healing for the first 2 months. Hope resurged after we danced two months after that. Hope is denial. I just don't understand why guys like tomay this particular game with you. Where they get your hopes up, but dash them so you give up and don't care and the. They get really flirty again and get your hopes up etc. And I fully feel in my gut that as soon as I do what I am planning to do and to begin to love on that things will be all wonderful again when I see him. This is complete and utter bs and give by he situation I was probably a fool to believe anyway. But still. Tonight it feels so very cold again. I just want to be warm!
Author AnyaNova Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 Hope is a menace. Hope kept me from healing for the first 2 months. Hope resurged after we danced two months after that. Hope is denial. It shouldn't be, but it so often is. Mine doesn't even have the excuse of being my ex. I just for my own stupid hopes up. If I'd realized you were holdinmon to that much hope, I would have tried to talk you down from that ledge!
Never Again Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 It shouldn't be, but it so often is. Mine doesn't even have the excuse of being my ex. I just for my own stupid hopes up. If I'd realized you were holdinmon to that much hope, I would have tried to talk you down from that ledge! Oh, I'm better now...I think. I've "let go" to a large extent. Other people who were close to the situation kept telling me that it wasn't over, and I didn't want it to be, so I held on for two solid months. As for the game playing, I couldn't tell you. Sometimes I think that people just don't realize the "signals" they're giving off.
robbysurfs Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 I was no contact with my ex girlfriend for 10 months and had this hope you speak of. More like a fantasy that maybe just maybe she might come back and a part of me held on to that. Then the day came and I went and looked at her FB page and saw she had moved on. It really hurt but it was necessary for me to realize we broke up for a reason and the reason is we were not meant to be. My closure is she does not want to be with me she had moved on so should you. It will get easier but in the meantime you should read this book "the power of now" by ekhart tolle it was very helpful to me.
firefly2613 Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 "Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies." You just have to hope for the right things.
guest572 Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Hope is a dangerous thing. Hmm i am clinging to false hope. There's not much I can do about it, I am hoping one day I will suddenly come to my senses and fully let go. I checked out a guy today! And he wasnt my ex.
lovebirds Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Hoping does not bother me that much in my process actually... My best friend told me that if I lose all hope I will break down and that was kind of right? She advised me to not lose hope but to realize that I had to let him go if I wanted to have a shot with him somewhere in the future. I clung to that and let him go, focussed on me and tried to see how I could become a better person. First in the hope of being the person that he wanted me to be (stronger, more responsability, less of a procrastinator) because those were things I want to become anyway, even if we don't get back together. Later just for myself. After some time hope seems to fade away, and I've let him go. I'm still improving myself but am now doing that for my own happiness, not to impress him.
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