MaddieA Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 Well.. me and my boyfriend have been together over a year and a half. We have a very close relationship, we go to college together and were pretty much like best friends. He broke up with me just short of us being together a year, those 3 weeks i cant even describe. It felt like my chest had been ripped open. i didn't go to college for 2 weeks and spent the Christmas holidays locked in my room depressed. He called me 3 times, saying he missed me, needed me ect. the next day he would go right back to not caring. Apparently he just didnt love me anymore. Well anyway long story short he asked me for another shot on new years eve and i said yes. things got kinda rocky from there, he would have strange mood swings where he seemed to have no emotion or love for me. Then about a month in, he admitted hed been with another girl for 4 months. He begged me to stay and..like an idiot let him back in. Things after that have been okay, no big arguments, stupid ones here an there. Anyway heres where my problem starts. The weekend just past, my mum pretty much beat me up. My boyfriend took me into his home, looked after me and came back with me on sunday. We were fine. Said goodbyes. He called me when he got home, all fine. The 2 hours later he called again sounding abit odd, i asked what was wrong and he said nothing. I went to college today and he wasnt in which is weird to. So when i got home i called him, he said hed been up all night, and when i finally got it out of him, he was going on about how he didnt wanna go to university with me like we planned. When i told him how it upset me he wanted to leave me. I had to convince him to meet with me face to face but he just kept saying its best for him he dosent love me anymore hes been lying about it for awhile. He said he just dosent want a relationship anymore. Its crushed me.. but he said hes gonna give it afew days, we'll have no contact, unless its necessary since we have classes together. Hes gonna think about it apparently but dosent think he will change his mind. he did this before aswell when he left me. Im just terrified. I fell into such a deep depression before and thinking about loosing him again is so..scary. Hes the only person in my life i could turn to, my relationship with my mum isnt good, same with my brother. Have no other family or friends, im quite withdrawn and hes been the only one there for me. Im in debt and have a monthly phone bill to pay and hes been helping me, and being my emotional support. We have university auditions coming up, one as early as this Thursday (its Monday right now) and his nan was the one taking us..so if he decides to leave me i cant go. i know i propably sound silly im just so scared to loose him, hes the first guy ive ever really loved and imagined a real future with. Any advice would be helpful, thanks for reading my vent.
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