Tayken Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 I don't understand the question. If you don't love them how can they destroy your heart? Simple...think delusional for a second
Author Eggplant Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 That would be an incredibly selfish thing to do. Wouldn't you be destroying THEIR heart in the process? Yes it would be. And in one of my subsequent posts I specified that in this scenario you'd be honest with the person about your feelings.
Author Eggplant Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 I was thinking the same, and how does would marrying them and having children with them insulate the OP from loss anyway?You can't lose what you never had.
regine_phalange Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 I wouldn't put such a burden (the feeling of not loving) on my self. I am not a person to share things as my life, my house, my day with someone I'm not crazy about and hasn't proved to be a great person. I'd love to feel the miracle of pregnancy, but if I don't find someone amazing it's not going to happen. If I feel the need to have children, if I really deserve it, I may volunteer at an orphanage and have fifty children that would love me as a mum. Sometimes we see problems where in reality there aren't any. 1
RedRobin Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 It is more important to me to be with a man who values intimacy and wants to do the work of maintaining a loving, respectful relationship than it is for me to be overwhelmed with 'passion'. That's not love to me. Guess what I'm saying is that you just need to define what love means to you. Even with people you don't 'love' there are habits, rituals, and dependency formed... and that means loss can occur even with those you don't love or don't love you. Might as well hold out for someone you at least have care and respect. 1
gaius Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 So, most women marry men that they dont love? Sure. I don't think that's true, but most do end up with a guy that isn't the one they loved the most. As sad as that sounds. If any two men and women spend enough time together they can usually develop some form of love for each other. So it's not as bad as it seems. 1
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