sTX021 Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Quick background: my ex and I dated for 2 years and were very good friends for 2 years prior to that. Our relationship initially was perfect but after the first year or so, things started to go downhill. About a month ago, a couple days after our anniversary, she broke up with me, telling me that she's tired of the fights and needs to be alone. I agreed and gave her a couple days without contacting her, but one night I couldn't take it anymore and I drove to her house. I cried, admitting that I hadn't been the best boyfriend for her, and pleaded for her to take me back. She cried too but she said no. A couple days after that night, we met up with her female cousin and we talked about our relationship. Her cousin took my side in the fights and told her that if she broke up with me, she would regret it. We decided to give our relationship another try. For the next 2 weeks, our relationship was perfect. We had no fights, the sexual chemistry was there and we had a great time. For Valentines day, I took her on a 2-day getaway which she loved and I gave her handmade card with pictures of us inside. When we got back from our getaway, I took her and her cousin out on a date to thank her cousin for her help (especially because she didn't have a Valentine). However, the day after that, my ex met with me and told me that, even after all I had done on Valentines Day and despite the perfect 2 weeks that we had, she didn't feel closer to me. She told me that she didn't feel the same love for me and it was giving her anxiety. We broke up that night. Over the next week, we tried to talk as friends and I know that talking to each other only as friends bothered her and made her sad. But I couldn't take being friends anymore as I desperately wanted her back. So yesterday, I met up with her and asked her to make a decision. I pleaded with her to take me back but she said the feelings weren't there anymore and she couldn't fake it. I told her that, in that case, I couldn't be friends with her and we parted ways. She msged me later on at night, we talked for a bit where she said "I wish our relationship wouldn't happen so that I would still have a friend" among other things, but at the end of the night, we said our goodbyes and I have began no contact. So my question is now: what is the next step? I desperately want this to work as I feel that this girl was the one for me. To be honest, we haven't gone no contact for more than 3 days in the past 2 years, so I really don't know how she will take it. She's previously said that she wouldn't be able to take not talking to me. Is there a possibility that if she gets some time alone, the feelings may come back? So my question: is there still a chance? And if so, what do I have to do to win her back? Additional notes: My birthday is in 3 weeks. Her birthday is in 5 weeks. And she owes me a bit of money that she is going to pay by March 10th, so I will be seeing her once by then for sure. Thanks for your time, I really appreciate it
Yasuandio Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 (edited) Google "Kick Love's A$$." It is an organization for free help to get your ex back with a particular method of NC. But remember, NC is always for you. A young lady has been writing about her success with the program on LS. On one of the above links, you can try to do a search, or actually start a thread to look for her. The material, site, and support is great. She found a way to share some materials with other member's too, that they otherwise would not have had access too. Hope this helps. Check my link at bottom for the 180's and NC. Don't break NC whatever you do. And do not take her call no matter what. Trust me - I've read everything, and broken all the advice - only to find out I SHOULD have adhered to the program. Good luck Kicking Love's Azz! Yas Haha! I found her NC "Kicking Love's A&&" Story for you! http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/415395-my-no-contact-story Edited February 24, 2014 by Yasuandio
Author sTX021 Posted February 24, 2014 Author Posted February 24, 2014 ^ Thank you. Any other opinions?
legion113 Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 Go no contact period. I missed thanksgiving, my birthday, christmas, new years and valentine's day. She contacted me the day after Valentine's which we both spent alone. Stop looking for excuses to contact her. Go out and enjoy yourself. stop waiting for the phone to ring or for a text from her. If she comes back she comes back, but hanging around, talking to her, texting her isn't going to make that happen any faster.
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