generic person Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Hey Guys, MY ex broke up with me roughly 6 months ago tomorrow, tomorrow is also her birthday and we pretty much haven't had any contact since the break up except for a short period of a week or two when she messaged me on my birthday. we started talking on the phone again and it quickly went down hill as expected when she told me it is to soon to be talking. This was a few months ago. Since then I have sent three or four texts over Christmas, wish her a safe trip overseas etc to be polite with no reply. is it appropriate to sent her a bday text? and should I do it knowing she hasn't replied to any of my others? I feel like I want to be the bigger person and be polite and nice to her even if she doesn't. The last time I Messaged her was a couple months ago for her sisters birthday. Anyway all advice welcome
lvroflife Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 I don't think there is a situation of the "BIGGER" person. You two broke up, you don't need to do anything. She didn't respond to your holiday texts, she said it was too soon to talk so it is on her to reach out to you.
Musing Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 If this was a case of you guys not speaking at all (on either side) for several months and you wanted to throw out a "Happy Birthday" text out of kindness, and were totally open to not receiving anything in return, then I'd say all power to you. However, you sent out several texts before only be be ignored. I think I'd sit this one out and move on. The fact she did not respond to your others, even a "thank you", speaks enough and is a sign for you to not proceed.
Weallwalkthelongroad Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 I wouldn't. You will sit around waiting for a response that may or may not come from her. If she does respond, are you prepared to talk further knowing you may hear some stuff you don't want to?
plutonium Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Although I've only just broken up I've already been thinking about this (overthinker). I feel like it would almost be rude (for me) not to register his birthday (although by then maybe I won't want to). The thing is you can't expect any response whatsoever. It's like wishing anyone you haven't seen in a while Happy Birthday on facebook or something. So if you're doing it in the hopes of a response, you shouldn't. And it seems she doesn't want contact with you so far, so if it's just going to cause you more pain when she doesn't respond- don't text her.
Own Worst Enemy Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Unfortunately she has shown by ignoring your previous texts that she isn't interested in getting into a dialogue with you. Don't send it. Your silence is much more eloquent than the text would be, even if you got hold of Shakespeare on a ouija board and got him to draft it for you. 1
stillafool Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Absolutely do not text her anything. She told you before it is too soon for you two to be talking. Don't ever contact her again. She will contact you when she is ready to talk and hopefully by then you won't give a damn.
d0nnivain Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Why do you want to send the text? You probably don't even realize it but you want to send it for more than purely altruistic reasons. Therefore, you should NOT send it. She also doesn't care. If she cared, she would have responded to your other texts with a responsive Merry Christmas or even a TY when you wished her a safe trip. Her silence is screaming Leave Me Alone. Why can't you hear her?
Author generic person Posted February 23, 2014 Author Posted February 23, 2014 I'm not too worried about the whole thing, I'm dating/ generally having a ball and going over seas for a month in a under two weeks time. I'll be honest though It will feel weird not texting her for a birthday, I just wanted some other opinions, some friends say send her a message some say don't. In my defence though my previous text never warranted a reply, they were always Statements "hey hope you have a great christmas and a happy new year" etc. but anyway Maybe if I don't message her that will say more then any text ever could?
Author generic person Posted February 23, 2014 Author Posted February 23, 2014 not sure how to delete this comment
crackerjax9 Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 She texted you for your bday? I thought you said she hasn't tried reaching out
Author generic person Posted February 23, 2014 Author Posted February 23, 2014 Why do you want to send the text? You probably don't even realize it but you want to send it for more than purely altruistic reasons. Therefore, you should NOT send it. She also doesn't care. If she cared, she would have responded to your other texts with a responsive Merry Christmas or even a TY when you wished her a safe trip. Her silence is screaming Leave Me Alone. Why can't you hear her? I just thought I would be nice about it, for all i know she has a new boyfriend and im not to worried about the whole situation, she messaged me on my birthday to be nice so i thought i might do the same. after all a few months has past since I contacted her but I probably shouldn't waste my time I only wanted to get other peoples perspective on the birthday message
Author generic person Posted February 23, 2014 Author Posted February 23, 2014 (edited) She texted you for your bday? I thought you said she hasn't tried reaching out I did no contact for a few months then she texted on my birthday, we started texting back and forth for a couple weeks and spoke on the phone, then she decided out of the blue we can't talk anymore because it was too soon and said she only messaged me to be nice. after that i sent a couple text saying merry xmas etc Edited February 23, 2014 by generic person
veggirl Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 No. She doesn't respond to your texts--you look desperate continuing to text someone who doesn't respond. You're right "merry xmas" doesn't REQUIRE a response but anyone who gives a s.hit about the person sending it WOULD respond. she doesn't. so don't text her. It makes you look like you're fishing for a response, whether you are or not. 1
Recommended Posts