HeartbrokenNewbie Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Wow thats a hard one... I get the whole not wanting to start a relationship on a lie but also u dont want it to appear u have had 0 relationships... I think keep it casual dont confirm nor deny ether way, change the subject if need be... maybe just say u have dated a bit but never turned into anything serious x x
FitChick Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Only insecure people want to know how many sexual partners you've had. I've never had anyone ask me. 1
Poppyolive Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 I really don't think it should matter, as long as you are a decent person and a whole bunch of awesome. I think you are making it a big deal in your head thus knocking your own self confidence. It won't be asked tight away about relationships & sexual partners and by the time that subject comes up it will be easier to handle truthfully with maybe a hint of white lie.... Recap you're building it up too much in your head. If I went in dates with a guy, then got sexual and eventually chatted about past relationships & experience... I would feel at ease...and plus new sexy times can be created with each new partner & relationship... Its not what you used to do... Its about making it right for the moment. I have yo GI nie.. Because ive overloaded on caffeine & I'm a ramblin'
CrystalCastles Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 You know, the number of partners is really not important information to know. I remember there was a guy I liked a while back, who had only ever been with 1 girl (and I don't think he even had sex with her) and he's 27. Clearly that information didn't "repel" me from him. If I wanted a high-number man, I could just go to a club and pick up some man-whore and the job is done. Sex isn't about knowing every porn-star move there is. It's about enthusiasm and wanting to learn, eagerness and desire to please your partner.
Hornylildevil Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Only insecure people want to know how many sexual partners you've had. I've never had anyone ask me. I agree, with a caveat. People lie. Men and women. I read somewhere online that a cat should multiply by 4 the number of partners a woman says she's had. But I also tend to think a woman should multiply by at least 2 the number of women a man says he's been with. My honest answer is 15-18. Supposedly, a woman averages just shy of 5 partners and with I think I read 7? But results may very. I agree with the insecure part. Kind of like a guy asking his GF if her last BF was "Bigger than me?". WTF?! 1
kaylan Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 I'm no good in bed either. Why is it men don't deserve love and affection unless they can f**k the woman hard enough? I dunno what to tell you OP. The reality is that sexual satisfaction is a basic human desire (hell, a need for many). Plus sex is many times a good glue for a relationship as it can be one of the truest forms of expressing how we feel for our partner. I think youll have to find a gal whos not that much into sex if you want a long term relationship.
kaylan Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Nobody will ever understand me sexually. I'd rather be given a HJ than have intercourse because the climax is more intense (for me). Then with intercourse I prefer to go slow, but I guess women want to be raped and slapped or else you don't deserve her affection. :confused: Not sure if srs. You preferring a HJ, is no different to women who prefer oral or fingers to get off. That said, you should also enjoy intercourse with your partner. Dont expect things to go far with a woman who enjoys sex if you cant enjoy it with her. And on that last bit...um women like both rough and gentle sex. Usually they like a mixture of the 2 within the same session. Its really all about passion and losing yourself in the moment. Sometimes animalistic hard fvking feel right...and sometimes slower more involved love making feels right. I could use some myself right about now lolz.
TaraMaiden Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Only insecure people want to know how many sexual partners you've had. I've never had anyone ask me. How many YOU had FitChick? Bet itz mor dan meee....
deathandtaxes Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Don't lie. It's the worst way to start off a budding relationship and will kill it once it's been exposed. Why lie about it? What have you to gain by lying about something like this? If the woman doesn't like your answer, then so be it! There's plenty more who will like your answers.
silvermercy Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 I wouldn't call people who want to know past numbers insecure at all. I would call them non-risk takers. I'm the same. People are very fast to paint us as inscure. Far from the truth. OP, as a female it's refreshing to hear you haven't had a high number of partners. The only thing I think you should work on though is some of the bitterness you seem to have. That's a bigger problem for you than the low partner of your numbers. I wouldn't call the latter a problem. 2
lino Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 I wouldn't call people who want to know past numbers insecure at all. I would call them non-risk takers. I'm the same. People are very fast to paint us as inscure. Far from the truth. OP, as a female it's refreshing to hear you haven't had a high number of partners. The only thing I think you should work on though is some of the bitterness you seem to have. That's a bigger problem for you than the low partner of your numbers. I wouldn't call the latter a problem. You wouldn't call it a problem but most women are turned off by that. Women with your attitude are very uncommon and are vvery rarely single, doubly so if they're good looking. That's just the world we live in. I'd keep it to yourself OP. Women simply want what other women want. It's nature. 1
TAV Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 You wouldn't call it a problem but most women are turned off by that. Women with your attitude are very uncommon and are vvery rarely single, doubly so if they're good looking. That's just the world we live in. I'd keep it to yourself OP. Women simply want what other women want. It's nature. Yep, we are all Stepford Wives; you figured us out!
kodakgirl Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 You wouldn't call it a problem but most women are turned off by that. Women with your attitude are very uncommon and are vvery rarely single, doubly so if they're good looking. That's just the world we live in. I'd keep it to yourself OP. Women simply want what other women want. It's nature. Woohoo, I must be Super Special-- I am rather charmed when a man hasn't had many relationships, I'm single, AND I'm good-looking!! What do I win?? SOME women, who are not very good people and value totally the wrong things, might only want men other women want. Women with good hearts-- the kind you should be looking for-- don't. It doesn't make a man any more appealing to me if a lot of women are after him. In fact I'd rather none were, though I usually get involved with great guys where that is a bit unlikely. 1
carhill Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Since then, I can count the times I've been laid on 1 hand. Indeed, I've gone years and years without sex. Dude, I'm 54 and, presuming you're talking about unique sexual experiences, still have my thumb left, and I've been married. IMO, no need to lie about your past, rather see it as inconsequential to the present. I recall, when I was in a LTR at 35 where I would lose my virginity, we talked about relationship history. I noted a few girlfriends in my past (true!) but didn't go into any sexual details because there were none!. Worked out fine. Rinsed and repeated and will continue to do so until dead. 1
StanMusial Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 You're assuming she's going to straight up ask you. Which she might, but you don't have to go into detail. Honestly I have never been asked in any sort of detail about my relationship history. And I've never asked a girl either. If you get to know them over a period of time you can sort of figure out what the deal is.
Hornylildevil Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 Dude, I'm 54 and, presuming you're talking about unique sexual experiences, still have my thumb left, and I've been married. IMO, no need to lie about your past, rather see it as inconsequential to the present. I recall, when I was in a LTR at 35 where I would lose my virginity, we talked about relationship history. I noted a few girlfriends in my past (true!) but didn't go into any sexual details because there were none!. Worked out fine. Rinsed and repeated and will continue to do so until dead. Did you know that the philosopher Emanuel Kant died a virgin? Maybe that's why they called him "Kant"! Sorry, I don't know why but your post made me think of that...
StanMusial Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 Did you know that the philosopher Emanuel Kant died a virgin? Maybe that's why they called him "Kant"! Sorry, I don't know why but your post made me think of that... I guess now they should call him "Didn't". 1
lino Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 Yep, we are all Stepford Wives; you figured us out! I'm not American... Not sure what a Stepford wife is.
lino Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 Woohoo, I must be Super Special-- I am rather charmed when a man hasn't had many relationships, I'm single, AND I'm good-looking!! What do I win?? SOME women, who are not very good people and value totally the wrong things, might only want men other women want. Women with good hearts-- the kind you should be looking for-- don't. It doesn't make a man any more appealing to me if a lot of women are after him. In fact I'd rather none were, though I usually get involved with great guys where that is a bit unlikely. There is a reason why players, man whores, etc have all those notches on their belt. They're what majority of women want. I have 3 friends who have had more women than anyone I know and there is good reason for it. Women who don't value men like that are very rare.
Hornylildevil Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 I guess now they should call him "Didn't". Either that or "never will"!
mortensorchid Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 I have seen both sides of this coin you are talking about. Either the party (man or woman) has had very little experience or has had a lot to the extent that they have been promiscuous. Honestly, what does it matter? Say you meet someone and have a fleeting encounter with them. It could just be a handshake and say "Hi how are you?" and then your paths will never cross again. What does it matter? It doesn't. Plus, whether either fact is true or not, what matters is who you are.
Salvatore85 Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 I'm no good in bed either. Why is it men don't deserve love and affection unless they can f**k the woman hard enough? You aren't any good in bed because you aren't trying to be any good in bed. Sex is supposed to be fun and you're making it out to be a chore. 2
Fly Union Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 You shouldn't lie but you shouldn't tell the truth either. What do I mean? JUST KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. If she asks, be vague and just say "I've had my own number of relationships". If she asks, how many women you've slept with, say "I don't like to treat the women I've slept with as numbers". Therefore, no matter how much she presses you, you can't give a number.
Rainbowx Posted February 24, 2014 Posted February 24, 2014 My amazing boyfriend had had at least several horrible experiences with women, decided to never ever try dating again... then a few years later he met me and decided I was way too good to let get away. After that I discovered that at the age of 30 he's a virgin and had no idea what he's doing at all!!! It didn't bother me in the slightest but I was genuinely surprised because he's gorgeous. I helped him learn the ropes though without making him feel insignificant or ashamed about it and now he's quite skilled =p 1
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