GudDude2013 Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 I can imagine how you feel. I too have been dumped and will probably never know the real reason, so in that aspect at least you know what the problem was. Women who are out for money eventually play themselves out to, because just like a man with money can have her, he can have someone who looks better and younger too, so she will feel the sting whenever it's time for her sugar daddy to get a new and improved model. When she's given her walking papers and her benefactor gets tired of their arrangement, who do you think she's going to try and get back into good graces with? There is nothing that anyone can really say about dealing with the pain of heartbreak. That is a deep dark tunnel we sometimes have to navigate alone, hurt, and depressed, but this tunnel is not endless. There will be some light at the end of it. Know that light is there and will be waiting for you to make your way to it. HOW? NC that's how. As hard as it is to not break contact, as difficult as it is to convince yourself that if only you could tell her this, or that, that it's going to make a difference. It won't. Unfortunately it hasn't been my first time to the dance so I already know that time is the cure wether she comes back or not. If you concentrate on your healing enough you will be in the mental, spiritual, and emotional shape to deal with her like she should be dealt with. Just know that as long as you attempt to stay in the picture in any way, shape, or form she will not miss the opportunity to be mean, cruel, and evil to you at her amusement. You will give her the ego boost she needs to be insensitive, and uncaring toward you. She will through her new bf in your face for no other reason than to cause you pain, and it will be the pain that you are begging to receive each and everytime you deem fit to contact her. Your open wound will fester instead of scabbing over. NC.... leave her alone and try to you in the stages that will come. Easy? No, but necessary. You have got to move on and know that you deserve better. Don't be a glutton for abuse and punishment although easier said then done. Allow yourself time to grieve. It is a process that you will survive. One foot in front of the other gets you to the light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck! 1
Chi townD Posted February 26, 2014 Posted February 26, 2014 I am slowly starting to realise that perhaps I've been used for the last nearly 8 year's of my life. It's the thing that's hurting the most. I've invested so much time, effort and above all, LOVE into her, and now it feels like it was all for nothing. There are so many questions I want to ask her, why did she stay with me for so long? Did I ever mean anything to her? Every time she told me she loves me, was it all a lie? There are so many things I want to ask, but I dont think it would do me any good to know the answers. God, I feel so unhappy There are so many questions I want to ask her, why did she stay with me for so long? Because the money was still coming in. Did I ever mean anything to her? Yep! a pay day. Every time she told me she loves me, was it all a lie? No, not exactly. She loved your wallet, which was attached to you. Look, here's the deal. You need to find a girl that WANTS to be with you rather than NEEDS to be with you. There's a BIG difference. This girl can say to you, "Look, I don't need to be with you, I'm fine on my own. But, I chose to be with you because I WANT to be your girlfriend and perhaps, even more than that over time." That's when you know you have value to a girl. Another thing you need to stop doing is placing girls a pedestals. When you place a girl on a pedestal, she's now looking down at you. And then they discover that they can walk all over you because you let them. A girl should be by your side, hand in hand. Your equal and partner in crime. Most girls don't want to be on pedestals.
Author keith.1 Posted February 26, 2014 Author Posted February 26, 2014 Thank you all so much for your words. It really does mean a lot. I have to say, I was very much on the verge of texting her today, but fortunately I logged in to this site first and you all pulled me back from the brink of actually doing it. So thank you. It really is difficult. I find the hardest times of the day for me are in the evening when im laying in bed, and first thing in the morning when I wake up. I keep having this fantasy of, me moving on to a place in my life where im actually happy again, and her coming back and telling me what a big mistake She's made and asking for a second chance, and then I tell her that she's completely blown it and its way to late! I know thats an extremely shallow fantasy to have, but oh my god, that would feel so good. Almost like I'm taking back the power that has been ripped out of me. Such a mixed sense of emotions right now, it's really taking it's toll on me. I just want this to all stop. Sometimes I feel life would be so much easier if we as humans were completely incapable of feeling emotions such as love. It just seems to make us all vulnerable and weak.
Author keith.1 Posted February 28, 2014 Author Posted February 28, 2014 Well it's almost 1 week of NC. I know it's not a long time, but I've actually suprised myself that I've made it this long. Today was particularly hard though as I had a really bad day at work and obviously whenever I had a bad day, my first instict was to call my ex and she would always cheer me up and make me feel better. Wow, this NC thing is hard! I have to say though, im not really feeling any better about things right now. I still miss her like crazy, despite doing everything I can to keep my mind off of her.
Chi townD Posted February 28, 2014 Posted February 28, 2014 It's only been a week dude! That's nothing! Hang in there and stay strong! KEEP BUSY THIS WEEKEND!!!!
Author keith.1 Posted February 28, 2014 Author Posted February 28, 2014 Thanks man. I will definitely try. I've got a lot of thing's planned for the weekend so it should keep my head busy for a while
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