brokenheart94 Posted February 22, 2014 Posted February 22, 2014 Lets start from the top. Me and my ex have been going out for almost 2 years it was quite a long distance relationship but nothing that bothered us. The first year and a half went great, we loved each other so much talked to each other a lot did things together it was all going so well. A few months down the line things started to change.. she started to slowly get distant from me and I asked her what was wrong. It dawned on her about the fact that her parents don't know about us, and the fact that her family is very religious and wont accept anyone who is of different religion (she was a Hindu I'm a Muslim). I told her not to worry about that but she kept repeating the fact that she would have to break up with me eventually and how the thought gives her pain her due to the reason stated above even though I told her not to worry we will get thru it. After about 2 months of barely talking to each other but still expressing our love she sends me a break up message a week before valentines day. I was shocked and didn't know how to respond... at the same time she also told me about this other guy who she has been seeing and how he liked her etc (im assuming she is of same religion but I didn't have the strength to ask). I was heartbroken </3... even though we broke up she would still say she loves me and we would kiss etc but she wouldn't be as open to me as she used to. Like i had to be the one initiating things and then she would respond. for e.g. I would say "I still love you" but she would say I love you too in a cold manner. I know she still has feelings for me but she said that she didn't know what to do and then this other guy comes along who made her happy again. It was only a few days after we broke up where she finally said that she has a bf and my heart just stopped.. after only a few days? :'( I don't know what to do ... Ive been thinking about the no contact rule but then I keep thinking about the fact that all the things me and her once had would be gone to waste and that kills me, plus she also gets mad if I don't talk to her... like she only sends me one worded answers compared to my paragraphs but gets angry when I don't talk to her? I love her so much and shes the only one ive been thinking about ... I cant eat sleep or even focus on my uni work..I cant stop talking to her for even a few minutes even though she is cold to me. Like just today I was telling her about how much I missed her yet her response was im busy. Someone please help me. The thought of her being with someone else drains the life out of me and makes me depressed but im trying to move on. I did all I could but her mind is made up... I love her <3 <3 <3 (P.S sorry for the long thread)
crackerjax9 Posted February 22, 2014 Posted February 22, 2014 Mine broke up with me the week before valentines day too!! In a text. I'm devastated. Went until last night NC and then decided I needed to hear him say it in person and he did. He told me he wants me to move on. I feel like my heart has even ripped out of my chest. I haven't stopped crying for 3 hours.
crackerjax9 Posted February 22, 2014 Posted February 22, 2014 You need to stay NC. She has a new bf. and if you not talking to her pisses her off, good. She broke your heart why should you talk to her?
Author brokenheart94 Posted February 22, 2014 Author Posted February 22, 2014 :( im so sorry to hear that i know what ure going thru...she also told me to move on aswell but i just cudnt believe that she said such a thing and she didnt sound so sure about it.. this is all new to me as shes the first girl to ever have feelings for me and i love her to bitz. Im trying my best to have NC but its so damn difficult!
crackerjax9 Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Stay NC well do it together you can be my break up buddy lol 1
Lei Ping Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Go out and get laid. You'll feel much better.
crackerjax9 Posted February 23, 2014 Posted February 23, 2014 Haha that may make us feel better for a night and then we'll just feel ****ty in the morning
Author brokenheart94 Posted February 23, 2014 Author Posted February 23, 2014 Haha yh we should stay NC buddies together that would be so helpful
Author brokenheart94 Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 So i talked to her today. I told her that i love her but her response was 'good for u' i asked her why she was bein mean she sed her bf read the message... i told her how she called me weak yday because one minute i wud hold on the next i wud let go so i said this is the reason why i do that. I told her i cudnt see her in another mans arms her response was 'uhm i got a test talk to u later' that just killed me... i think the only reason shes being mean is to hide the pain that we cnt be together. But why do i still care n love for her even tho she treats me like this?
David87 Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 Dude stop talking to her, can you see how she responds to your texts, she's mean and arrogant. NC and block her on everything.
Poppygoodwill Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 For the one being dumped, it takes a while to change the pattern of talking to the person, and thinking about them, and including them in your days. She was ready to do it before, which is why she was able to break up wiht you. But it is going to take you time to break the habit of her. That's what no contact helps you do: break the habit. also, it helps you feel less vulnerable because your pain and sensitivity won't be on show for her. She's hardened and indifferent to your feelings. That's how she got to the point of breaking it off and finding a new BF. She is literally incapable of saying or doing anything at this point that will make you feel any better at all in your state of vulnerability. So don't talk to her. Don't keep putting yourself in the position to be hurt again and again. As for the rest....it does no good to think about why why why she did/does something. Now is time to shift your focus to yourself. Do things that make you feel good. Spend time with friends. Cry if you want to, then pull yourself together and get out of the house. Go to movies. Work out more than usual. Slowly slowly you will start to feel better. And honestly, if she knew that there was a huge impediment to your future (mulsim/hindu) then it's probalby a good thing in the long run that she had the courage to end it. Otherwise five years from now you could find yourself in the same positino, only having wasted another five years on her. 1
Zahara Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 i think the only reason shes being mean is to hide the pain that we cnt be together. But why do i still care n love for her even tho she treats me like this? Uh no. A guy that chases a woman that is rejecting him is plain annoying. You become a pain in the ass, especially when the other person doesn't feel the same way about you anymore. Find your dignity and your self-respect. There's nothing more unattractive than a man who lets a woman spit on him then lays down like a doormat. I'm not sure why you aren't getting it. 1
Author brokenheart94 Posted March 1, 2014 Author Posted March 1, 2014 Its so hard not to talk to her when i check her statuses she looks so happy with her nee bf and everything else whilst im here worrying about if she is ok and having the urge to tell her i miss her. Aghhhhh thos feeling sucks. She sends me one or two messages and thats it.
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