LEEVIT2F8 Posted February 19, 2014 Posted February 19, 2014 In the interest of posterity and linguistic integrity please note: Urban Dictionary is not a reputable source for etymology. The accepted meaning of the word "hoe" among the masses (and not just uneducated slackers who believe that anything written must be true) is: hoe [countable] a garden tool with a long handle, used for removing weeds (=unwanted plants) from the surface of the soil —hoe verb [intransitive and transitive] Give Websters time to catch up. They do add new words and alternative definitions every year. And I'm pretty sure most of the "uneducated slackers" here were able to distinguish the context in which I used that word. Regardless, I find your contempt for me absolutely yummy!! @OP - Did you catch your own Freudian slip? I do agree with Palmer as deliciously bitter and jaded as she is however. And having sex with your ex was no big deal. And she is 100% right sex with your ex was safer for you emotionally. You already know hes a cheating PoS, there is really no emotional risk. The bottom line if you think this makes you a slut then it does. If you can accept that you made a mistake and learn from it even better. Certainly the tone of my posts were intended to shock you out of a negative mind set. And it worked! Look at the personal growth you have made in just this thread? I really do hope the best for you young lady. And I have seen many young women start the path you began only to end up devoid of character down the road. In the end, you take responsibility for your own decisions and actions. And we can NEVER truly love someone else until we understand, accept, and love ourselves. This is true NOT just for the good things but everything. I hope this helps you because despite what you might think of me, I believe your going to be a pretty incredible person when you grow up.
SYLLPalmer Posted February 19, 2014 Posted February 19, 2014 Thank you SYLLPalmer.... Reading some of the comments here, I realize there is this notion that it is ok for men to sleep around and do as they please but if a woman did that or had sex with an ex (whether he was a cheater or not), she is immature and stupid. If a man sleeps with a cheater ex, then his buddies would high five him and tell him 'use that hoe for sex'. I guess that is what our society has taught us. I know I was only trying to over justify what I did and I understand I am not ready for a new relationship. And yh...I should have never had sex with a cheater. I have already cut all ties with my ex and gonna be focusing on myself. Maybe I did need this encounter to realize that I should really cut all ties with my ex and to get it out of my system that the relationship is dead and over and I should move on. Maybe in the future if things work out, I'll give it a try with this new guy. I know I have been an emotional wreck since the break up which is why I told the new guy I don't want to have sex or be in a relationship with him because I do fear he might cheat on me and break my heart as well. That is right. Plain and simple. No need for all the psychoanalytical crap and commentary. You made a snap decision and only you can judge if it was truly a mistake or just another experience. At the risk of self contradiction I will point out that you may have a proclivity for the cheating kind. How do you break yourself of it? Push the envelop and date guys against your grain and see where it leads. At 42 I am learning that there are people, places and things that are perfect for me that I never would have discovered had I followed my natural inclinations. I figured this out by opening doors I lacked enthusiasm for and by taking a closer and more unbiased look at said people, places and things. It doesn't always lead to something but the outcomes have been positive enough to reinforce using this step back approach. 1
SYLLPalmer Posted February 19, 2014 Posted February 19, 2014 Give Websters time to catch up. They do add new words and alternative definitions every year. And I'm pretty sure most of the "uneducated slackers" here were able to distinguish the context in which I used that word. Regardless, I find your contempt for me absolutely yummy!! My Dearest LEEVIT2F8, As much as your pleasure does thrill me you have read me wrong. I was being playful with what I perceived you to be at the time. There is a frond of truth and honesty to what you share but your need to cling to the shock factor spoils it. You woo me with your words only to break the spell when you make that transition to Rodney Dangerfieldville (i.e. impervious idiot.) You are clever enough to make your point without the nails on the chalkboard routine. Become the man you were meant to be my darling. Forever yours, STYLLPalmer
Trep Posted February 21, 2014 Posted February 21, 2014 Thank you SYLLPalmer.... Reading some of the comments here, I realize there is this notion that it is ok for men to sleep around and do as they please but if a woman did that or had sex with an ex (whether he was a cheater or not), she is immature and stupid. If a man sleeps with a cheater ex, then his buddies would high five him and tell him 'use that hoe for sex'. I guess that is what our society has taught us. I know I was only trying to over justify what I did and I understand I am not ready for a new relationship. And yh...I should have never had sex with a cheater. I have already cut all ties with my ex and gonna be focusing on myself. Maybe I did need this encounter to realize that I should really cut all ties with my ex and to get it out of my system that the relationship is dead and over and I should move on. Maybe in the future if things work out, I'll give it a try with this new guy. I know I have been an emotional wreck since the break up which is why I told the new guy I don't want to have sex or be in a relationship with him because I do fear he might cheat on me and break my heart as well. Ermm, no one has said in this thread that it would be okay if a guy did this. I don't know where you're pulling that from. If you were a guy and you slept with a cheating ex while dating another girl it wouldn't be any less immature or stupid. Anyway, I'm glad you've come to the conclusion you need to be single for a while and completely ditch the ex (though I'm not sure how you plan to do this while living in the same building with him) and give yourself time to heal from the relationship.
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