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so tempted to brake nc after 18 days ugh


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Posted

I have no reason (real reason) to contact him.

 

I don't even really want to see him but for some reason the past few days I have been dying to get in touch

 

I've done my best keeping busy & I'm posting here to try and get it out my system

 

I hate this feeling so much and don't really understand tbh as I really don't like the man anymore

Posted

It's an addiction. You're going through withdrawal, and craving a 'hit' - hell, I am too. Last week I was madder than hell but now I'm really missing the constant contact. Go on a walk, watch a movie, do SOMETHING - but don't contact. It won't make you feel better - in fact, his response might be so lackluster it will upset you. It will just set the clock again for when you get itchy fingers again. Every moment you hold out will make life in the future that much easier.

 

Mourn him like someone who's died. He's gone, it's over, time will heal the wound.

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Posted

Would it make you feel better if I told you that well after two years and I still get that urge/feeling to have contact. Addiction sucks.....psychological or physical, it sucks

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Posted

I have nothing to say to him purely because he's still married and I do not wish to be the ow

 

I'm just dying to know what he's thinking, not that after all his lies I can trust the answer

Posted

Exactly, and knowing that means you don't need to wonder what he's thinking, eff him. Let him wonder what you're thinking.

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Posted
Exactly, and knowing that means you don't need to wonder what he's thinking, eff him. Let him wonder what you're thinking.

 

after the way he's been lately I doubt he's even noticed I haven't replied to him

Posted

He's married= let that be your closure

 

You're 'imperfect' , we all are, we made a mistake and learned a lesson=let that be your closure

Posted
I have nothing to say to him purely because he's still married and I do not wish to be the ow

 

I'm just dying to know what he's thinking, not that after all his lies I can trust the answer

 

Yup, anything he says you'll question as you can't trust him so what is the point of speaking to him?

 

Vent it here or write letters to him, then rip 'em up or burn them!

 

You're gonna be okay IMP. I think you're further ahead in your healing much more than you realize and of course it helps to know the guy truly is a d*ckwad, so hopefully your anger will make you detach even more and care less. Your mind will shut him out automatically as time goes by too.

Posted

OP, I think you are focusing on the wrong things right now. I know I was about my xAP, wondering what was wrong in his marriage, wondering did he REALLY love me, wondering what he thought of it all, digging to try to find his tarnished past - the fact of the matter is, he's married. Period. That's not going to change (at least anytime soon). You deserve better.

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