Dante9 Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 I am a 24 year old male dating a 26 year old female. We met online, live about an hour apart and have seen each other once per week for the last 3 weekends, with the last date being on Valentine's Day when we also had sex. All of our dates have been a lot of fun and I see no glaring issues when we're together. When we first started talking online and texting, she was extremely open to communication and talked quite a lot. But right after we agreed to meet, she cut contact almost completely. Now, I am always the one to initiate and it's almost like she goes out of her way to send the shortest response possible (if she can get away with one word, she does it). She has initiated a few times but even then the conversation dies quickly because she more or less stops responding. If I don't say anything, she'll allow several days to go by without any contact. I have kept contact to a healthy level, so it's not like she became overwhelmed with me spamming her or anything. If I call her, she seems more than happy to meet up with me again and she does most of the talking. However, for logistics reasons, it's not practical to be calling all that often. I know I probably sound like a stage 5 clinger, but I have asked a few friends what they think and they all find this to be pretty strange as well. Why is she so receptive in person yet she won't keep up with simple communication anymore - even going so far as to kill off the communication that I try to start? I know they're "just" text messages but something tells me there's an underlying issue here. I don't feel comfortable just coming out and asking her about it since it's a bit too early to be doing that.
lil_missy Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 i'd agree with your friends that this is strange. esp because you said she used to like to talk alot and communication has now dropped off. this shows she's losing interest or no longer interested. she probably agrees to hang out with you because she's bored and have nothing better to do. its not a reflection on you. i was hoping you'd get positive responses that perfectly explain how she could do this and still be interested in you, as i was in a similar situation before. there was a guy that i hooked up with once a week or every other week but hardly communicated with me in between. truth was i just wasnt on his mind, people that care about you will keep in touch with you. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 I don't think she's very interested any more, OP. Sorry, I know that sucks and it hurts. But if she were into it, I imagine she'd at the very least keep the convo going. I'd step back and limit contact. If she wants to, she'll get back in touch.
Chico333 Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 I'm in the same situation as you. The guy I've been dating will initiate dates once a week, me as well, so we will see each other usually twice a week. He takes me out to dinner and what not, but there's barely any contact in between, which he does not really initiate much and if he does it's a short, what are you doing today? I've come to the realization he's not that interested in me other than a booty call and a girl to hang out with here and there. I made excuses at the beginning that he was just not much of a phone guy, but later realized that was not the case. I agree with the statement above. If she really wanted to, she would make an effort to contact you and talk to you. The fact that she doesn't means that you just aren't on her mind anymore.
Author Dante9 Posted February 17, 2014 Author Posted February 17, 2014 Thanks, everyone. That's pretty much what I needed to hear.
Recommended Posts