enchanted771 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 To make a long story short, knew this guy for months just talking as friends and we met a month ago and hit it off. We both had a great connection which even he agreed. We spent the weekend together last weekend and became emotionally close and connected. Couple days later, he's talking about getting together but never happened. There was a bad snowstorm but yet went out the next day. Valentines day he texts me and is even complimenting me, not sure if he was just being nice in response to my compliment. Later he tells me that he still wants to see each other. Ok fine. Get a text a couple days later just small talk. No mention of seeing me. He does however mention how busy he is with his business and the big projects he's been working on. He has always been busy ever since we've been talking. A couple times our plans never panned out. Last 3 weeks we've been seeing each other a lot. Supposedly that's when it was kind of slow. I kind of think its bs because If your into someone you make time. Which was the reason for his Breakups. I thought if he was trying to blow me off why even contact me? But am I being naive? I didn't try and contact him he contacted me. If this is a waste of time I need to just move on from this
acrosstheuniverse Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 He's just killing time, checking to make sure you're still interested for an ego boost. If he wanted to be with you/hang out with you then those things would be happening. Dropping the 'busy' line into all of your conversations is a well-known code for 'this isn't going to progress into anything more serious'. Waste of time, move on and get busy. If he is in the 5% who for some bizarre concrete reason really haven't managed to meet you yet, he'll realise what he's losing and chase. But he probably won't.
Author enchanted771 Posted February 17, 2014 Author Posted February 17, 2014 I figured as much. We have met. We were seeing each other often but now I'm thinking he's unstable. When we talked before anywhere from 1-2 weeks sometimes passed where we didn't talk which tells me he was dating someone else. I'm going to just move on and date others. If he asks to see me at some time do I see him or blow him off?
acrosstheuniverse Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 Personally I wouldn't bother seeing him again as his interest level isn't really high enough to sustain anything significant, or at least that's how it'd look to me. I want to be with a guy that think I'm awesome from day one and wants to build a relationship with me, not somebody that blows me off all of the time. If you will always wonder 'what if?' if you don't give him a shot, then if he asks you out again, you could ask him what he is thinking and tell him that you're up for going out for dinner. Let him take you on a proper date, with no prospect of sex, just you two getting to know one another. It will be a good indication of how willing he is to start things up properly. But don't count on it!
Author enchanted771 Posted February 17, 2014 Author Posted February 17, 2014 We went on a real date last weekend lunch and movies at night but I agree with you
Survivor12 Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 He wants casual dating; you want a relationship. He's comfortable with occasional contact; you want daily interaction. You're both entitled to your own preferences. Unfortunately, in this case, they aren't compatible. Save yourself a lot of frustration, disappointment and heartache and move on now before you become even more attached.
Author enchanted771 Posted February 17, 2014 Author Posted February 17, 2014 I am actually okay with talking every 2-3 days. He is the one who complained about 2 weeks ago because I didn't try and contact him for 4 days. So I was trying to be accommodating. I told him I know he is busy and I have no issue talking every couple of days or so. He was the one whining. Not me. Until this week, I was making myself too available for him so that is when his behavior changed.
ja123 Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 Just tell him flat out that you are looking for a boyfriend where it could progress to more. end of story
mortensorchid Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 Sounds like he's yanking your chain or killing time until he finds someone he likes better than you. Sorry to say. Best to move on.
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