chryssy Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 I live in the US and have been dating a guy in Spain for over a year and a half. We met in Spain, and knew each other for a short time before we decided to date exclusively. His job is keeping him in Spain right now, but he has said that he is planning to move to the US in a year. The main problems are his lack of communication (emails are very rare, he rarely calls though he says he will and then ends up not calling for pretty lame reasons), and the fact that I am always the one to go visit him and to put effort into us talking. All of these things make me doubt him when he says he will move here, and his general dependability in the future. I love him, and I do believe he loves me, but I just do not know if I am wasting my time. I have talked to him about this frequently and frankly, and he acknowledges the problem, and changes behavior for a few weeks, but always slips back into his same undesirable pattern. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!! Thanks so much!! Link to post Share on other sites
Sarah12385 Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 how long has he been in this "lack of communication" phase? i dated a guy who lived in Denmark, and i live in the U.S. went on for about 8 months, maybe a year. things got the same way, but i was the one not communicating. i got bored, frustrated, and lonely. not having that person with you can be just horrible, however, you have met your man in real life, i never did. i'd be asking for some stronger answers from this espanol hombre. is he or isn't he movin to the U.S? ya can't wait around forever, but i understand that since you met him, you know how it actually *feels* to be around him. i'd let him know just how crappy it's makin ya feel, let him know you're not really feeling comfortable with the situation, do you feel something is wrong? if so, aknowledge that to him. he needs to know! bueno suerte ~Sarah~ Link to post Share on other sites
Author chryssy Posted January 20, 2005 Author Share Posted January 20, 2005 Thanks. Yeah I mean he says he's moving to the US next May; he's just so flaky in general that I'm not sure if it will happen. And his lack of communication has just been pretty constant for a year...bad I know. I just don't know if it's normal guy stuff, or if it's me, or if it's just how he is. When we're together it's usually great...if he could manage to not be so distant at other times there would be no problem Link to post Share on other sites
Sarah12385 Posted January 22, 2005 Share Posted January 22, 2005 well, May is in about 4 months, which isn't too too long away which is good news could wait around til then unless it's completely driving you up the wall. i admire you for your patience! i would be feeling so heavy hearted. you should send him one of those reeeeal cute ecards 'n see how he reacts. ~Sarah~ Link to post Share on other sites
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