Sesili Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 (edited) hey guys this is my first post ever here. my bf broke up with me 3 months ago and it's getting worse for me now then when he left me I just want it to stop already :/.i been keeping myself busy keeping NC for two months now i never checked he's Skype or FB once for this 3 months.Sometimes I am proud of myself for being able to resist this temptations but then how am I so strong with this and for the last week every time I wake up I cry and want to crawl in a hole and die. I know he isn't coming back and I probably won't ever hear from him again and I am learning to deal with it and move on but today it's the worst days of all for me I am so lost and broken I miss him so much.I don't wanna bore you with reasons of why we broke up and long posts I just needed to tell someone my pain hoping it will make me feel a bit relieved and maybe just a bit better:(. I see all you awesome people here and when I read your posts it makes me feel like I am not alone and someone will understand me I did try talking to my mom about in how much pain I am but after 3 days of me crying she started asking me aren't you over it already.How can I lose the love of my life and be over it in 3 days can't talk to my friends about it either they keep saying u should be over it by now I just feel like nobody understand me from my family and friends:/.it already feels better just by writing this P.s sorry for my bad English Edited February 16, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
LostConfused123 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I know how you feel. So sorry for your pain! I'm really sick of missing my ex too. I guess time is what we need more of. Hang in there. Sending you hugs!!
newmoon Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 you will eventually move forward and past the hurt. in month 3-4 I was still very sad, crying sometimes at night, etc. I am at 6 months now and feel well over it, no tears, but still get upset when I think of everything. my mother was also mean to me and wasn't a good friend. she expected me to 'get over it already' about 2 weeks after the breakup. we had been together 2+ years so I was very hurt by what my mom said. but it just shows that women (and men) heal in different ways; some of us take longer. take as long as you need, it is only a major problem if you can never move on. I decided to not confide in my mother after that because she would get upset that I wasn't over the guy; I started talking to my girlfriends to help me
muffin Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I know how you feel. I had someone leave me 4 months ago and I'm still just as upset now as I was when it first happened. Some of the shock has worn down a little but I still think of that jerk every single day and miss him, even though I'm disgusted with what he did and what he has become since leaving me. There is no set time to get over things, it depends on how deeply you cared and circumstances. Just take care of yourself and don't set any expectations that would put pressure on you.
Allumere Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 all normal...I have had enough experience. 3 months here....and I just miss him. I've had some good things happen and he is the first person I want to tell. It takes me a long long time and I know it...about the 6 month mark I'll just get bored enough to do more stuff and maybe by 9 guys will look good again. Right now not interested in being real social. It's the catch 22, bored and lonely at home but can get stressed after going out cause coming home to the empty house yet again will bum me out (it passes eventually) so my focus is on working out, house remodeling, drawing, piano and rescue work.
LostConfused123 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 you will eventually move forward and past the hurt. in month 3-4 I was still very sad, crying sometimes at night, etc. I am at 6 months now and feel well over it, no tears, but still get upset when I think of everything. my mother was also mean to me and wasn't a good friend. she expected me to 'get over it already' about 2 weeks after the breakup. we had been together 2+ years so I was very hurt by what my mom said. but it just shows that women (and men) heal in different ways; some of us take longer. take as long as you need, it is only a major problem if you can never move on. I decided to not confide in my mother after that because she would get upset that I wasn't over the guy; I started talking to my girlfriends to help me Wow! Not to thread jack but my mom was the same way. I'm almost ,4 months and as far as she knows, I'm so over it. Oh well, at least we have other friends and of course this site (thank God) Hang in there OP. We're here for you too. You're not alone in this nightmare, even though sometimes it feel that way. Hopefully after 3 or 4 months, the very worst is behind us. Still hurts. . . Bad!!! But every day we are getting closer and closer to the other side. ((hugs!!))
Author Sesili Posted February 16, 2014 Author Posted February 16, 2014 Thanks guys:) just reading those posts makes me feel better and not alone.I know I will move on I just have days where I am fine and have accepted the brake up and then next day I have all the stages of dealing in one day(since people say u deal with brake up like people deal with lost or dead and u go trough stages).I don't even know what stage I am at I have them all and none it feels like I am going crazy trying to analyse myself and I get so mad that I think about him all the time.I never really got any closure and I know I am hanging in more to that than to him.I don't want him back either I just wish I've gotten a damn apology or any kind of anything rly but I never did what I got was nonsense and lots of it.I keep on holding on to that he will call one day and I will finally be able to say everything I wanted but I know he probably won't so all I'm left its regret,bruised ego,million of questions with no answers.I know that makes me selfish and bad person but I wish someday he falls in love again and she leaves him just like he did me with no proper explanation.i feel ashamed of myself wanting this to happen to him but I can't rly help it:/
WYSWYG Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 (edited) hang in there... I know how you feel. You miss the good times: the friendship, the company, the intimacy, the giggles. But also remember the bad times and reasons why you're not together anymore. He decided to walk away and abandon that love - F him! And say it to yourself! I was also looking for a closure, a reach out or an apology but I don't think they feel that way. Whatever their reason is, is right for them. They just wanna be out of it - F them for that inconsideration! Try to get distracted as much as you can. Avoid being alone if possible. Go out for a walk, the gym, coffee shop, mall, read books, watch stuff on youtube, etc. Cry it out as much as you want. Release that "toxic vomit" and you will feel better. I made a list of the nasty names my ex use to call me. It's posted on my fridge. I'd rather be angry than miserable. She left me for a mutual acquaintance 3 months ago. I still miss her sometimes but remind myself of her domineering, selfish and nasty side. Again, hang in there. There is an end to this. Spring will be here soon. Edited February 16, 2014 by WYSWYG
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