Robert Z Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I often turn this show on as a default if there's nothing particularly interesting to watch. But I have noticed that it bothers me to watch it. The relationship between he and his wife brings back so many bad memories that it makes me never want to get married again. I think the character of his wife is enough to make any man run screaming through the streets. It is interesting to me that it was such a popular show...I wonder why. I think I've watched the last episode. Often, it actually pisses me off to watch it. It is funny how something like this can trigger such bad feelings. The worst fight my ex and I ever had was after watching the movie, The War of the Roses. It pushed too many personal buttons. 1
pie2 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I completely agree...it's stomach-wrenching sometimes. And Everybody Loves Raymond isn't the only show like this. I see many men characterized as 'weak' in relation to their belittling wife/gf, and that women have to "put up" with their bumbling, idiotic men. 2
xxoo Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Huh. My husband loves that show, and sympathizes with the wife. He had a huge crush on Patricia Heaton for years because of that show.
Author Robert Z Posted February 16, 2014 Author Posted February 16, 2014 Huh. My husband loves that show, and sympathizes with the wife. He had a huge crush on Patricia Heaton for years because of that show. Maybe he finds it funny because you don't treat him like crap?
Author Robert Z Posted February 16, 2014 Author Posted February 16, 2014 I completely agree...it's stomach-wrenching sometimes. And Everybody Loves Raymond isn't the only show like this. I see many men characterized as 'weak' in relation to their belittling wife/gf, and that women have to "put up" with their bumbling, idiotic men. Yes, to me it says, men should put up with this crap. And it teaches women that this sort of behavior is not only acceptable, but funny.
xxoo Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Maybe he finds it funny because you don't treat him like crap? It's true, I don't! But he never expressed anything about her character treating Raymond like crap. He calls Raymond an idiot.
Author Robert Z Posted February 16, 2014 Author Posted February 16, 2014 (edited) He calls Raymond an idiot. Of course the man is an idiot. That is the point of the show. And this justifies the woman being as obnoxious and abusive as she wants to be. Your husband doesn't understand when he's been insulted. This isn't about Raymond. Raymond is a symbol for "men". And I see the same abusive attitude found among abusive women in my family, including my ex wife. Edited February 16, 2014 by Robert Z
xxoo Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Of course the man is an idiot. That is the point of the show. And this justifies the woman being as obnoxious and abusive as she wants to be. Your husband doesn't understand when he's been insulted. This isn't about Raymond. He is a symbol for men. My guess is that he doesn't identify with the character simply because he's a man. Why should he? My husband knows how to keep a woman happy 2
pie2 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Of course the man is an idiot. That is the point of the show. And this justifies the woman being as obnoxious and abusive as she wants to be. Your husband doesn't understand when he's been insulted. This isn't about Raymond. Raymond is a symbol for "men". And I see the same abusive attitude found among abusive women in my family, including my ex wife. Obviously a TV show doesn't have any sort of responsibility to promote the values I believe in. If I don't like something, I can just not watch it. However, as annoying as these shows can be, I'm not on any sort of misogynistic bandwagon. On a larger social scale, this dynamic can be a problem, but is in no way solely the fault of the woman. It takes two to tango! 2
gaius Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Ray abuses her as much as she does him. Letting his mother get away with what she does. It's certainly not a one sided thing. I think I relate more with Frank than I do Ray anyway. 2
Author Robert Z Posted February 16, 2014 Author Posted February 16, 2014 My guess is that he doesn't identify with the character simply because he's a man. Why should he? My husband knows how to keep a woman happy I don't understand how your comment applies to anything said here? If he doesn't identify with the character, then it may be because you don't treat him that way. Maybe he wasn't raised by and surrounded by abusive women when he grew up. But when we ask why the show was a success, it comes down to people identifying with the characters in the show on some fundamental level. Barbara Bush could never understand why The Simpsons was such a popular show. But the reason was clear. The audience identified with the characters.
Author Robert Z Posted February 16, 2014 Author Posted February 16, 2014 (edited) Obviously a TV show doesn't have any sort of responsibility to promote the values I believe in. If I don't like something, I can just not watch it. However, as annoying as these shows can be, I'm not on any sort of misogynistic bandwagon. On a larger social scale, this dynamic can be a problem, but is in no way solely the fault of the woman. It takes two to tango! It is a reflection of our culture. Obviously the show wouldn't bother me if I didn't recognize the abusive attitudes on a personal level. Edited February 16, 2014 by Robert Z 1
xxoo Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 At the moment, we are sitting here watching Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Laughing our butts off. The main characters (4 men and one woman) are ALL idiots. I don't think the show works because people relate to the characters. It works because it's funny in an over the top way. How about The Office? Are all men insulted when we laugh at Michael or Dwight?
gaius Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 How about The Office? Are all men insulted when we laugh at Michael or Dwight? Of course, they're all secretly representations of all men. 1
Eggplant Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I have no respect for any sitcom that uses recorded laughter every 5 seconds like a broken record.
rumbleseat Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 I don't know if it's true that people mostly like shows if they relate to the characters. Many people enjoy soap operas simply be chase they are so outlandish and a fantasy escape from their real life. An interesting side note, I always like the actor who played Raymond's father, and according to an online source I checked to find out what else he was in, he was good friends with John Lennon, who was best man at his wedding.
Woggle Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 I hate shows like this and it seems in the 90s every show that featured a married couple was like this. At least on Married with Children everybody is an idiot which is why it is one of my favorite shows.
florence of suburbia Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 (edited) I believe Ray Romano created and produced the show and many of the conflicts and drama portrayed are drawn from his own life experience. The wife is just a "straight man" character in most episodes, allowing Ray to get the laughs. If he prefers to accomplish that through portraying his character as a buffoon it's probably because that's where he himself finds humor. Edited February 17, 2014 by florence of suburbia
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