SpiralOut Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 (edited) I mean strong-willed, strong-minded, standing by your beliefs, not allowing others to break you. I get the sense that certain people will hate you if you are strong. It's just this impression I have. Thoughts? Edited February 15, 2014 by SpiralOut
amaysngrace Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I'm strong in all of the ways that you've described and I don't really give a crap if people hate me. I like me and my opinion is the only one that really matters in that regard. 2
Pyro Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 People who dislike you for those reasons alone are jealous.
Silly_Girl Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 People can be intimidated by someone who is committed to their well-thought out beliefs, if they themselves don't have any or haven't thought those things through. 1
peruano99 Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 No matter what you do, people will always find something to hate. 2
thefooloftheyear Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I'm strong in all of the ways that you've described and I don't really give a crap if people hate me. I like me and my opinion is the only one that really matters in that regard. lol...yeah, that's my m/o as well... All kidding aside, I find people generally patronize me..I dont know what thats about, but it annoys the hell out of me sometimes.. TFY 1
Taramere Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 (edited) I think people love strong individuals when they (the individuals) are in agreement with them, and like them far less when their views collide. I tend to like strong, blunt people whether or not I'm in agreement with them unless they become arrogant or obnoxious in a way that crosses my personal boundary between entertaining and offputting/unlikable. Sometimes it's the strongly opinionated person themselves who is in the wrong/doing the hating. A couple of friends of mine, who are very politically minded, tend to be like that. Two of them (one very right wing, one very left wing) I just wouldn't be able to bring together in a room because it would be one of those awful situations where they would fall out and each would try to pressurise me to have nothing more to do with the other. There's being strong, and then there's being unreasonable and controlling like a toddler using tantrums to deal with every tiny conflict that arises. Take the politics out of the equation and both are lovely guys, but when it comes to their political beliefs there's no room for middle ground with either of them. I find that very difficult, because I'm eternally that person who tries to see both sides...and when it comes to dealing with strongly opinionated people who insist that only one side is right, they regard that as weakness or even treachery. If you're not with me you're against me, etc. For me, that is actually weakness. If a friend of mine disagrees with me on an issue (political or otherwise) that's okay. I can argue my own corner on things, and I don't need friends to step in and support me on every issue. My boss is the stereotypically very strong, very opinionated woman. You can disagree with her, and that's fine. She enjoys an argument. Sometimes she crosses the line, in her aggressive approach to life, and becomes a bully. That, of course, is when she starts to get a bad reaction from people....but it's not because she's strong. More that she's forgetting to respect other people's boundaries. Edited February 15, 2014 by Taramere 4
BradJacobs Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I mean strong-willed, strong-minded, standing by your beliefs, not allowing others to break you. I get the sense that certain people will hate you if you are strong. It's just this impression I have. Thoughts? Some people will love you for it. Others will hate you. Even more will be on the fence thinking that it's neither a good or bad trait to have. The fakes will compliment you for having a strong personality while chastising you for those same virtues to others when you are not present. I really don't care for the last two groups of people. I'd rather people either love me or hate me as it makes life easier to know which to focus your energies on.
Grumpybutfun Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I mean strong-willed, strong-minded, standing by your beliefs, not allowing others to break you. I get the sense that certain people will hate you if you are strong. It's just this impression I have. Thoughts? In my personal experience, people have only expressed admiration and respect for what you are describing about me and others like me. Aggressive, close minded crazy people who push their beliefs on others and who think the world should revolve around them is a different story. Fanatic fundamentalists and conspiracy theorists come to mind. G 1
GoreSP Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I mean strong-willed, strong-minded, standing by your beliefs, not allowing others to break you. I get the sense that certain people will hate you if you are strong. It's just this impression I have. Thoughts? I don't think people don't like strong people per say. Though people don't like to have their own **** thrown back at them which is what people who are strong-willed and stand up for themselves do. 2
Andy_K Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 Nobody dislikes strong people for that alone. Those who think they're disliked because of being strong are general actually disliked because they are abrasive, and lack empathy, tact, and consideration for others. 2
regine_phalange Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I think people tend to dislike strong, aggressive, self-centered in-your-face fellows, but they like the ones who are strong, calm and gentle. 2
MissBee Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I mean strong-willed, strong-minded, standing by your beliefs, not allowing others to break you. I get the sense that certain people will hate you if you are strong. It's just this impression I have. Thoughts? I don't see why as a rule people should. There will always be people to hate any kind of person though. However, what I do find is some people confuse being rude/abrasive/inconsiderate for being "strong", likewise some people think confidence and being cocky are the same, or being intelligent and a know it all, being nice and a pushover and the list goes on of qualities that are good that people confuse for qualities that are related but different, so then some people will think people hate them because they are confident, "tell the truth" or are strong when in fact they aren't any of those things but its related negative.
amaysngrace Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 How someone makes you feel is just a matter of perception. A person can say the same thing to two different people and get two completely different reactions to their words and approach. How is that their fault that some are overly sensitive and tend to internalize everything that's said to them?
Author SpiralOut Posted February 15, 2014 Author Posted February 15, 2014 I don't think people don't like strong people per say. Though people don't like to have their own **** thrown back at them which is what people who are strong-willed and stand up for themselves do. This is what I had in mind when I wrote the original post. I don't know if I would say I'm strong exactly, but I've been working on standing up for myself and the reactions I get are quite explosive. I mean yeah some people back off respectfully, but others get angry and say rude things when I say no. Or they act rude to me all the time and I don't say anything until finally I've had enough, and I'll call them out on it. Oh wow do they ever freak out. I feel so hated sometimes, as I move away from being meek to being more assertive. Well pardon me for not wanting to smell your bull**** anymore.
Robert Z Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 (edited) I mean strong-willed, strong-minded, standing by your beliefs, not allowing others to break you. That's fine if you happen to be right. If you're wrong, then you're just a stubborn jerk. Why would you feel broken if you discovered that you're wrong? This sounds like a confidence issue to me. Being strong and confident doesn't mean unyielding. It means that you can be wrong and accept that without it negatively affecting your self worth. Edited February 15, 2014 by Robert Z 1
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