SmartDude Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 Sorry, but I hate them... Play hard to get with this cat and you will see me gone. 1
peruano99 Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 Especially when they look at you, trying to say something, yet back out and don't say anything at the end.
the_entertainer1 Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 OP - can you define the behaviours you would consider as being "hard to get"? As a woman, I don't consciously do it ... but sometimes think that it's subconsciously conditioned into us via the media. So, I want to be aware of the behaviours that you, as a man, think women use when "playing hard to get".
BikerAccnt Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 If she's playing hard to get, would she even notice if you were gone? 5
pickflicker Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 Sorry, but I hate them... Play hard to get with this cat and you will see me gone. You're in the minority, that's why women do it.
ExpatInItaly Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 They probably are not interested. Agreed. A lot of people confuse "hard to get" with "uninterested" because the latter is simply too hard a blow on the ego. 3
Author SmartDude Posted February 15, 2014 Author Posted February 15, 2014 Agreed. A lot of people confuse "hard to get" with "uninterested" because the latter is simply too hard a blow on the ego. I would rather a lady say that she is not interested. It would make me question my motives, what went wrong and how I could improve myself when I find myself with some one new. It would make it easier to let go and move on. I think that women who insist on texting but have a phobia of using the phone are going to be cut off quickly from now on.
Author SmartDude Posted February 15, 2014 Author Posted February 15, 2014 You're in the minority, that's why women do it. I am in the minority,it is true. Women always assume that because I am the tall,handsome romantic/creative type that my attraction is not genuine. They wonder why I am attracted to them, like "what does he see in me, im not special".
peruano99 Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 Well some women are really insecure about approaching men they think is "too good looking" for them in the fear they might get rejected.
894hjk Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 It's human nature for men to chase and dominate and for woman to be chased and woo'd somewhat. We don't like to look slutty n forward. It's masculine. The problem occurs when u have a man who thinks he's too good to persue a woman (it's usually because they don't like rejection actually) and a woman who wants to be chased. It took my ex and me 6 months to hook up for that very reason. 2
SYLLPalmer Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 I understand your frustration and the learn as you go approach. Still you don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water. There is a fine line between informed decision making and paranoia/baggage. This is what friends and the LS are for. Try to evaluate on a case by case basis. There is so much going on behind the scenes where "romance" is concerned. In this day and age I think we all can benefit from support in sorting that out. I played hard to get once and learned that it was the hardest game I ever had to get over. I shoot from the hip now because I never want that regret again. It is called being a grown up. Men are human beings first and I treat them like that to the very best of my ability. I maintain responsibility for my side of the street and I like to keep it very clean. Anecdotes of a 42 year old women. Peace 1
GoreSP Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Men complain when a woman is too easy... Men complain when a woman is too hard to get... Make up your minds, dudes! 3
Under The Radar Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Men complain when a woman is too easy... Men complain when a woman is too hard to get... Make up your minds, dudes! I'll take a woman that is "Heasy" ...... meaning, a woman that falls between being a doormat (easy) and bat **** crazy with a sprinkle of flakiness (hard). On second thought, I don't know what the hell I'm talking about. It's after 1 AM here and I am falling asleep at the keyboard ...... time to get to bed . 1
Kate9292 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 If she's playing hard to get, would she even notice if you were gone? Then she wouldn't be playing hard to get, just uninterested. I like to see guys work for "it" a bit before they get it. If I just gave it away for free, they wouldn't value it at all. And if someone quits just because they don't get it right away, I assume they didn't want it bad enough.
salparadise Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 It's human nature for men to chase and dominate and for woman to be chased and woo'd somewhat. We don't like to look slutty n forward. It's masculine. The problem occurs when u have a man who thinks he's too good to persue a woman (it's usually because they don't like rejection actually) and a woman who wants to be chased. It took my ex and me 6 months to hook up for that very reason. Ah, come on. Are you really going to try and blame it on men? Like so many behavioral issues, it exists on a continuum for both. Men who pursue without discretion are idiots, and the ones who don't pursue at all don't get pussy. Women who put out any time any place are sluts, and the ones who are just into being chased are prima donna dick teases. Somewhere in the middle you have moderate behaviors that serve a good purpose and allow reasonable, well-balanced people to connect. Prima donnas are every bit as boring as the ass-hole pickup artist types.
Radu Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I used to go for women who play hard to get. I used to put them on a pedestal, and try my best, and it got me where i am today. I still feel attraction to them, but then i remember what it basically translates into, 'i am better than you'. Weather it is a natural belief in the woman, or an artificial one to boost attraction ... i honestly don't care [the latter hints to a manipulative nature which is very bad], i'm done being in relationships with women who think they are God's gift to mankind.
Tayken Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I'll take a woman that is "Heasy" ...... meaning, a woman that falls between being a doormat (easy) and bat **** crazy with a sprinkle of flakiness (hard). On second thought, I don't know what the hell I'm talking about. It's after 1 AM here and I am falling asleep at the keyboard ...... time to get to bed . Yes...come back when you are sober, and thinking straight Be careful what you wish for
Revolver Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 It depends on the guy if its gonna "work" or not. For example if its a guy who gets women easily and gets what he wants from them easily it can work one of two ways. A.) He takes it as a challenge because he's not used to girls playing hard to get B.) he moves on because well he has other options
Tayken Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Whatever that means. It isn't working for it, its allowing you to play teenage games. It's no secret what hard to get means. here's a sampling she says she will call you right back and you don't hear from her for a week no matter what day you are available, she's unavailable that day, obviously intentional. she plays push pull she takes breaks from the relationship to test you. how to pass this test I'm still not sure. she spends hours talking about her exes. another test? I think this poster has been listening to "It" might not even be all that anyway, just because a woman is good looking, doesn't mean their hygiene is in order or they will be good under the sack. I personally don't have the time for women that think they are "all that", it's a turn off for me, and yes I'll rather not partake in head games
Radu Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Whatever that means. It isn't working for it, its allowing you to play teenage games. It's no secret what hard to get means. here's a sampling she says she will call you right back and you don't hear from her for a week no matter what day you are available, she's unavailable that day, obviously intentional. she plays push pull The bolded ones, but especially the latter. Another one is that she keeps cancelling plans, you are competing with friends a lot [you are not her friend !!!]. Or, always showing up late to dates. When i was in HS i was doing some extraschool work in a group setting and there was a girl there who was almost 18 and had an older bf. She was ready to leave on time, but she asked for extra work and joked with the guy in charge that 'it's good to let him wait 30min'. I'll always remember that when it happens to me. she takes breaks from the relationship to test you. how to pass this test I'm still not sure. You tell her bye-bye. Depending how you do it and weather or not it was a serious test, it can have one of the repercusions : - she tries to get back quickly - she goes her own way The latter obviously means that she doesn't buy your new attitude. she spends hours talking about her exes. another test? It can mean that she is either hung-up on one of them [so she is not clear for a relationship yet], or she is trying to create competition/ put you in your place. The latter is highly manipulative and it is probably done unconsciously [it's not planned well in advance, that's how she is]. A somewhat better example is her talking too much about her present male friends or talking about the many men who approach her / desire her.
janedoe67 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I was accused of playing hard to get a couple of times. The truth? I had no clue they were actually pursuing because they were so...subtle? about it? I grew up at the tail end of that "a lady doesn't call first" era, so I confess that the idea of making the first "move" would freak me out. Which is another reason I am becoming a nun.
Tayken Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I was accused of playing hard to get a couple of times. The truth? I had no clue they were actually pursuing because they were so...subtle? about it? I grew up at the tail end of that "a lady doesn't call first" era, so I confess that the idea of making the first "move" would freak me out. Which is another reason I am becoming a nun. The world needs more of those..... "A lady doesn't call first"? Hmmm....funny how in this day and age of supposedly working towards equality, some people still have that mentality. I guess some women will just have to wait longer or become nuns
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