Weezy1973 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Uh, yeah, I get that. I don't generally confuse Hollywood with reality. Some men do though. Yet you still used it as an example of how "real men" should and should not act. You actually sound quite confused...
Weezy1973 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Since when are attractive, intelligent, charming, etc., guys not able to be monogamous? A person's morals and character are not tied to their attractiveness level. Or their level of intelligence. There are attractive, intelligent and charming *******s disguised as gentlemen, and there are attractive, intelligent, and charming men with good character. Yes - I totally get this! What is the fantasy is that a "player" will suddenly change his stripes for the right woman. That is the romantic comedy fantasy that I was referring to. I know plenty of attractive, charming, intelligent men that are monogamous and quite happily married. But they were always that way. At no point did they want the jerk/player lifestyle. 3
Keenly Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I think this is a stupid conversation. If you are incapable of being yourself, you probably aren't going to have any success. If you are an a hole, be one. If you aren't, don't try to be. They will see right through it.
Under The Radar Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Too many men assume that being Ryan Gosling's character at the START of the movie Crazy, Stupid Love is the way to go. Watch to the end. It's NOT Any man can be an immature asshat who teats women like crap. You don't even have to be intelligent to do that. A REAL man isn't afraid to treat a woman like a person. I agree. Besides, on my last date , when I tried to do the LIFT from "Dirty Dancing", my back went out something fierce. Spending the evening in the emergency room was quite unromantic.
KathyM Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Yes - I totally get this! What is the fantasy is that a "player" will suddenly change his stripes for the right woman. That is the romantic comedy fantasy that I was referring to. I know plenty of attractive, charming, intelligent men that are monogamous and quite happily married. But they were always that way. At no point did they want the jerk/player lifestyle. Agreed. Players don't usually turn into good monogamous relationship partners, just as men with character don't wish they had the jerk/player lifestyle. 1
KathyM Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I think this is a stupid conversation. If you are incapable of being yourself, you probably aren't going to have any success. If you are an a hole, be one. If you aren't, don't try to be. They will see right through it. The problem is, some men think they need to be an ******* in order to maintain the upper hand with women and in order to get women, and so they become one. Of course, this type of thinking is pretty screwed up, and what they will end up with is dysfunctional women with low self esteem who believe they deserve to be treated badly.
Keenly Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 The problem is, some men think they need to be an ******* in order to maintain the upper hand with women and in order to get women, and so they become one. Of course, this type of thinking is pretty screwed up, and what they will end up with is dysfunctional women with low self esteem who believe they deserve to be treated badly. But you understand WHY some confused men would get this impression, right ?
TheGuard13 Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 Too many men assume that being Ryan Gosling's character at the START of the movie Crazy, Stupid Love is the way to go. Watch to the end. It's NOT Any man can be an immature asshat who teats women like crap. You don't even have to be intelligent to do that. A REAL man isn't afraid to treat a woman like a person. I haven't seen it in a while, but when in that movie does Ryan Gosling's character act like an immature asshat that treats women like crap?
Woggle Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I didn't get any of my ideas from a movie. I got them real life and realizing that women who truly know how to appreciate a good man and show it through their actions are very rare. The ones who do usually have found good men already. I have found that the worst male bashers are usually attracted to the very things they claim to hate about men. I don't encourage any man to use and abuse women but only put in extra effort for a woman who shows she can appreciate it.
Tayken Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 that women who truly know how to appreciate a good man and show it through their actions are very rare. The ones who do usually have found good men already. I have found that the worst male bashers are usually attracted to the very things they claim to hate about men. BOLD 1: Some truth in that BOLD 2: Ain't that just the truth
Author Phantom888 Posted February 17, 2014 Author Posted February 17, 2014 This is the biggest lie I've read on these forums in a long time. This is just a way of you rationalize you being a pussy and then lying about how happy you are in doing so and removing yourself from "manhood" essentially says " I want to be a man but im too scared to be a man" Wait... you mean to tell me that respecting women, avoiding ONS and being in a healthy LTR makes one a pussy? I have been offered ONS on 1st dates more times than I can count on both hands and feet. I'm just not into having sex with someone I don't really know or want a relationship with. I have been approached by women a lot younger than me, and I refuse to be viewed as a lame cradle robber who takes advantage of younger women. I mean, it is way too easy to bed a hot young woman, but I want more than that....much more. You can call me "greedy" or even "picky", but I sure am not a "pussy".
Tayken Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 Wait... you mean to tell me that respecting women, avoiding ONS and being in a healthy LTR makes one a pussy? I have been offered ONS on 1st dates more times than I can count on both hands and feet. I'm just not into having sex with someone I don't really know or want a relationship with. I have been approached by women a lot younger than me, and I refuse to be viewed as a lame cradle robber who takes advantage of younger women. I mean, it is way too easy to bed a hot young woman, but I want more than that....much more. You can call me "greedy" or even "picky", but I sure am not a "pussy". Wow....I thought it was just me that thought that way, I guess not eh I have bedded "hotties", and my cute child is an indication of my past. My attitude now is.....so what, does anything else come with that? I guess what am saying is, at this stage in my life having been married before, and now a single dad.....I just see a HOLE as just a HOLE, what makes yours so special if it's not accompanied with more substance?
escafeld Posted February 19, 2014 Posted February 19, 2014 I have been trying to be a gentleman all my life. I respect women, and I have never taken advantage of anyone. I have always only dated one woman at a time, and never cheated on anyone. I am deeply in love with one woman, who will be my wife in the near future. Sometimes I wonder what I would do if I were a complete ******* (a fantasy of mine). If I actually accepted sex offers from every woman I ever had 1st dates with, my number would be over 60+, and I would be having sex with different women every month. If I actually refused to commit to any woman, I would be dating multiple women at the same time. If I actually let women pay for the dates, I would have a much fuller wallet at the end of the evenings. If I actually dated girls 15+ years younger than me, I would get high-fives from all of my dude friends. Alas, these are just fantasies, and not me at all. I am perfectly happy with my life, and my family. I could have been an ******* in the dating world, but I believe in karma. I don't think it's right to disrespect women, because I have a daughter and it would break my heart if in the future any man would disrespect her. I am a strong believer in honesty and commitment. If anyone chooses to be an *******, that is okay. I don't judge. Just not my style. For all you men and women out there. Do you all have a "bad" side that you fantasize about? What would you do differently? I can think of many women who would regard a man as an a**hole who insisted on paying for their dates!
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