Found out that my ex is drinking just as much as I am after the split

[single83]

It's been about a month 1/2 after we split from a 1 1/2 year relationship/living together. We have about a 5 year history. The first two weeks were pretty **** rough for me. Right now I feel like I'm doing pretty good and and that this break up is for the best.

 

After those 2 weeks, my friends basically dragged me out of my apt and starting taking me out and I've begun to start doing the things that I used to love again. All the while keeping in minimal contact with the ex (He asked to keep lines of communication open.) I've done pretty good with keeping it at a minimum. This whole time he'd tell me that he's doing good and all.. but recently admitted to me that he had been drinking quite a bit "to sleep at night," and having a pretty rough time trying to keep his job. I did not mention that I was doing the exact same thing as far as drinking.

 

I do not plan on us getting back together since I 'm enjoying be able to do things for myself without having to worry about anyone else for once.

 

So I guess I'm just wondering why he would tell me all this time that he has been doing good when he really isn't?

[Timpye]

You didn't say who broke up with who? I guess it was mutual? Anyway I'm pretty sure you know the answer to your question. He's trying to act tough on the outside because no one likes to appear weak especially in front of their ex. Why didn't you tell him you have been feeling the same? Most likely for the same reason

[RDawg]

Drinking is not the way to cope with this, it is actually the last thing you should be doing at the moment. Who cares if he asked to keep the lines of communication open? Who cares how well he is doing? You certainly shouldn't. Cut him out of your life, he is your ex and no longer your concern. Focus on yourself and your future.

[HeartbrokenNewbie]

Please dont drink... I made that mistake and with the emotions I ended up in some pretty bad states... I know it doesnt seem it but u will recover better if u stay sober x

[FailedFirstLove]

I really think this is only a temporary fix.... Yeah it makes u feel good now and makes ur problems go away, but your problems are still there... When your sober and had enough it will also still be there...

 

Think of other ways to solve your problem?

[single83]

Yes it was mutial. I'm going try my best to stop.. I know it's not good for me. Perhaps I'm too stubborn to stay that I miss him.

[David87]

You can say that you miss him here on LS. Keep the drinking under control because it doesn't help you in this situation.