AnneT1985 Posted February 12, 2014 Posted February 12, 2014 (edited) hey y'all...question for you please and thank you! So I attended a family function of my hubby's recently. We haven't been married all that long. Most of his extended family and a lot of his friends were all there. I was having a great time socializing with people when his older sister (whom I do not know well and was sober) walks over to me, pulls me aside and whispers "don't tell Bob I told you this, but his ex showed up here. Don't worry I like you better". I had NO idea what she was talking about and she wouldn't say anything else about it and walked away. When I went to the bathroom, I saw my husband and "ex" were both at the bar ordering drinks. We went outside for a smoke and I told him what his sister said. He had no clue who or what I was talking about. In the meantime, while I was out front talking to Bob about this, his sister coincidentally left the event out the opposite door and drove home. Once back inside, I pointed out the girl I was talking about, the "ex", and he didn't even recognize her for several moments. Finally he did, and said she was there likely because she was related to the host (a family friend) and he went on a few dates with her about 20 years earlier. They didn't even recognize one another and she was there with her husband and children. SIL completely left all of that information out and I have no idea why, nor do I understand why she was (seemingly?) criticizing this lady who did nothing wrong. What are your thoughts on this? My hubby was upset with her and told her so a few days later. Her reason for it was claiming to be "on my side" and denied having any bad intentions whatsoever and is sweet to my face. I had absolutely no issue with this "ex" and there was no problem so why would a grown lady of 40 do such a thing? Do you think she was trying to start trouble or was this an act of solidarity that I don't understand? Would you keep a good distance from such a person? Thanks to each and every person for each and every opinion in advance:) much appreciated Edited February 12, 2014 by AnneT1985 spelling errors
d0nnivain Posted February 12, 2014 Posted February 12, 2014 In isolation, I'd ignore it. Perhaps her motives were good. Perhaps she's socially immature. Even if she was trying to stir up trouble, there was nothing to "stir". Stick by your husband, smile when you see your SIL but be guarded around her. 1
Author AnneT1985 Posted February 12, 2014 Author Posted February 12, 2014 (edited) thank you kindly for the answers thus far! Edited February 12, 2014 by AnneT1985
MidwestUSA Posted February 12, 2014 Posted February 12, 2014 She was just trying to stir up trouble. Probably hoping for a reaction from you, which she didn't get. 1
MyEvilTwin Posted February 14, 2014 Posted February 14, 2014 Sounds like somebody was intoxicated. Watch her future actions and words. You'll know soon enough if she's a drama queen often, or if it was the liquor talking. 1
Author AnneT1985 Posted February 14, 2014 Author Posted February 14, 2014 Thank you for your response. She was sober and has told me in the past she never drinks
Author AnneT1985 Posted February 16, 2014 Author Posted February 16, 2014 Thank you ! Much appreciated y'all
firemanq Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 Then she is a drama queen! No, she is an evil bitch. Keep clear of her, she is a very hateful person & thrives on the hate and dissent she spreads.
MissBee Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 hey y'all...question for you please and thank you! So I attended a family function of my hubby's recently. We haven't been married all that long. Most of his extended family and a lot of his friends were all there. I was having a great time socializing with people when his older sister (whom I do not know well and was sober) walks over to me, pulls me aside and whispers "don't tell Bob I told you this, but his ex showed up here. Don't worry I like you better". I had NO idea what she was talking about and she wouldn't say anything else about it and walked away. When I went to the bathroom, I saw my husband and "ex" were both at the bar ordering drinks. We went outside for a smoke and I told him what his sister said. He had no clue who or what I was talking about. In the meantime, while I was out front talking to Bob about this, his sister coincidentally left the event out the opposite door and drove home. Once back inside, I pointed out the girl I was talking about, the "ex", and he didn't even recognize her for several moments. Finally he did, and said she was there likely because she was related to the host (a family friend) and he went on a few dates with her about 20 years earlier. They didn't even recognize one another and she was there with her husband and children. SIL completely left all of that information out and I have no idea why, nor do I understand why she was (seemingly?) criticizing this lady who did nothing wrong. What are your thoughts on this? My hubby was upset with her and told her so a few days later. Her reason for it was claiming to be "on my side" and denied having any bad intentions whatsoever and is sweet to my face. I had absolutely no issue with this "ex" and there was no problem so why would a grown lady of 40 do such a thing? Do you think she was trying to start trouble or was this an act of solidarity that I don't understand? Would you keep a good distance from such a person? Thanks to each and every person for each and every opinion in advance:) much appreciated She seems like the type who likes to stir up drama and then either act innocently or is really oblivious to how she causes drama. I can't imagine why else someone would do that. You should ask your husband more about this sister and her personality, that may give you a sense of whether or not she has a history of stirring things up...and if so, then as with any family member who is "problematic", while I am related to you, I only handle you politely and if I must but otherwise steer clear of your drama. 1
escafeld Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 A case of divide and rule, AnneT. The SiL is seeking your approval by being conspiratorial, whilst sowing doubt in your mind about your hubby and the nature of the relationship he has with his 'ex'. If she deemed her presence at the party was inappropriate, she should have told the woman, or her brother-it needn't have been something to concern you with. Ps if she ever tries something like that again, just nod sagely with a saccharine smile and say "I know" 1
Recommended Posts