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Do they even think of us after 4-6 months of complete silence?

crazybestie101

By crazybestie101
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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crazybestie101 Established Member

crazybestie101

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Do dumpers ever think of us after we went on complete silence of 4-6 months. I am just so much hurt and wondering if my ex ever even think about me after 4 months of complete silence. I just feel like he does think but he will never even confess it because he is kind of guy once he made up his mind he will never ever back out from it. I think he is just different person now , shows off a lot. He has turned so much of himself. May be i am missing him so i am feeling this . Just sharing my weekend evening thoughts...

sportzhl24 Established Member

sportzhl24

Posted
Posted

My ex and I have been NC for almost 7 months now. Nearly the length of the relationship. It has been very hard. I think that they must think of us every now and then. Little things probably remind them of the relationship. It is important not to dwell on this however. Lost is a part of life and it is inevitable that somebody will "forget" about you. But nobody truly forgets. You'll always have a place in that person's heart

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Hoaks Established Member

Hoaks

Posted
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They do think of you after that amount of time. Little things make them remember. My contacted me after 4 or 5 months NC. Told me little things we did made her remember and smile. But for a very short amount of time. Hearing that actually makes you hurt a bit, I think it's best not to hear it. I wish I didn't.

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pickflicker Established Member

pickflicker

Posted
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Not enough to break NC...

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crazybestie101 Established Member

crazybestie101

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Posted (edited)

About me , yeah new guy is there. As i said earlier , we are not dating . Just talking and every time he gives me more details on his past , daily life. He doesn't ask me anything may be because he is very shy. Mostly conversation is initiated by me , he response but i feel like i am the only one playing in the game. Honestly , i am no longer planning on chasing guy. This new guy is nice no doubt but because he is shy , it seems like its taking forever for him to take lead and may be he would never. So i have just put him aside. About my ex , honestly after talking to this new guy , his memories have triggered. I miss all excitement , chasing , attention given by my ex. I just miss what we had. I agree with your point that now if i ever see my ex in my life , i will see him differently.I just wonder how i think of my ex here and there , does he feel same?

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barky2 Established Member

barky2

Posted
Posted

I feel if you ment anything to them, they'll always have you in the back of their mind.

 

As time goes on it fades.

 

But something even years later could make then think of you.

 

Doesn't matter in the long run.

 

 

 

 

 

Barky

  • Like 5
Musing Established Member

Musing

Posted
Posted

I'm going to pull from my own experience as a dumper (as per usual)

 

I left first LTR

I left him and felt guilt and relief as many would think.

He kept messaging me and keeping tabs on my life and it annoyed me after awhile. Eventually things fell silent.

 

Honestly, I did not really have the need to talk to him for almost a year. But I did think of him and miss him. He'd call me around my birthday every year and we'd catch up and were on good terms. Eventually, he stopped calling.

I think I reached out to him a few times and we made small talk but he was so into being in relationships, I always felt weird talking to him while he had girlfriends. He had I think 3 after me, and all were pretty serious until he found his now wife.

 

Last year, he was about to be married. I was going through my closet and found notes he'd given back to me. Mind you, at this time I was fully into a new guy (current ex) and had no romantic feelings for my my first LTR (it would have been nearly 7 years since we split) but those notes brought up something in me.

 

I reached out to him on facebook to let him know how great of a guy he was and to congratulate him, he deserves happiness. I don't really regret breaking up with him since everything worked out and we were just too different, but he definitely occupies a piece of my heart, being my first boyfriend.

 

Sadly, he did not reach back to me. He ditched facebook and moved on in life and was married, I hope nothing but the best for him. I do think about him still.

 

I was a dumper to someone else. I had almost no romantic or sexual feelings for him while dating (bad, I know) but was more of a "let's see where this goes" in college. He was a cool guy but I just wasn't into it. He was very persistent and I wanted to "give him the time of day" (seriously, no one do this) he and others pressured me into officially dating him. My fault.

 

I think of him now and again but not romantically. It's been 4 years. No desire to reach out to him (I don't want him to get ideas or assault me with questions and accusations), but hope he's doing well regardless. He was still a nice guy but I kind of resented him for trying to push the relationship so hard.

 

 

Relationships are so weird. But they'll think of you even through a year, two...or several of silence. I still think of some of my old crushes!

 

No matter the amount of silence, they will not forget you. There are always reminders not just for you, but them too.

  • Like 4
BC1980 Established Member

BC1980

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I still think of all my exes, even my first boyfriend from 14 years ago:-). I know he's married now, but I haven't talked to him in probably 5-6 years. I have nothing but fond memories of the time we spent together, but I wouldn't have said that when he dumped me.

 

I recently had something pretty weird happen when my ex from college contacted me via Facebook. He basically wanted to have a FWB type relationship with me, which I shot down. He's married but claims his wife won't give him sex. He also claims she said he could have sex outside of marriage. It was, bar none, the weirdest situation with an ex I have ever found myself in. So yeah, they think about you, but who cares? I'm not gonna be a f*ck buddy for my married ex.

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radiodarcy Established Member

radiodarcy

Posted
Posted
I recently had something pretty weird happen when my ex from college contacted me via Facebook. He basically wanted to have a FWB type relationship with me, which I shot down. He's married but claims his wife won't give him sex. He also claims she said he could have sex outside of marriage. It was, bar none, the weirdest situation with an ex I have ever found myself in. So yeah, they think about you, but who cares? I'm not gonna be a f*ck buddy for my married ex.

 

Oh good grief. My ex tried something similar. First he asked if he could take nude pics of me. He's an amateur photographer and said he wanted to experiment with photographing different skin tones (I'm Asian Indian). Mind you had a girlfriend who was pregnant with his kid at the time - - who he swore wouldn't mind.

 

I declined. Then he wanted me to get together to do ecstasy/make out session. I said no to that too. I never heard from him after that.

 

If that's the most he thinks of me then yeah, I'd rather not hear from him at all.

SadNLonley Established Member

SadNLonley

Posted
Posted

Whether they are still in love with you or not, there are things that will make them think of you. Memories dont just disappear. It just may not be enough for them to want the relationship back or to contact you unfortunately.

 

My ex is very good at the NC. He hasn't reached out to me since our BU 8 months ago, but when I reached out to him he admitted that he thought about me when certain songs played or just chilling out on a Sunday afternoon. He also mentioned that since we split he now has to sleep with a fan because I got him hooked. These atleast made me feel better to know i didnt just disappear out of his life completely.

BC1980 Established Member

BC1980

Posted
Posted
Oh good grief. My ex tried something similar. First he asked if he could take nude pics of me. He's an amateur photographer and said he wanted to experiment with photographing different skin tones (I'm Asian Indian). Mind you had a girlfriend who was pregnant with his kid at the time - - who he swore wouldn't mind.

 

I declined. Then he wanted me to get together to do ecstasy/make out session. I said no to that too. I never heard from him after that.

 

If that's the most he thinks of me then yeah, I'd rather not hear from him at all.

 

I figured this guy must have been pretty desperate to reach out via FB, no less, to find a f*ck buddy from 10 years ago. Does he really think I feel so low about myself that I have to resort to that?

radiodarcy Established Member

radiodarcy

Posted
Posted
I figured this guy must have been pretty desperate to reach out via FB, no less, to find a f*ck buddy from 10 years ago. Does he really think I feel so low about myself that I have to resort to that?

 

Who knows. He may have just figured he'd try for the sake of trying. I'm glad you told him where to take it! :cool:

 

In my case, my self-esteem when we were together was all but in the toilet. I pretty much did anything for him. So he probably thought I would do the same.

 

But by then I had regained a lot of that self-esteem back, so I had no problem saying NOPE

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