luvlost88 Posted February 8, 2014 Posted February 8, 2014 Ok, so a quick question… A friend of mine has been going out with this guy she met over 4 weeks ago, they have been going out several nights each and every of the 4 weeks. She seems to like him, but I have the idea he is leading her on or rebounding her due to the fact she has a car and he doesn't.. he has no better options at the moment and is going out with her to fill his time, clear his mind, ect.. (he just got out of a almost 3 year relationship less than 3 months ago. Now my friend met this guy on Facebook, however while I was looking for my own dates on plenty of fish I noticed this guys profile (100% sure its him) and for the past several days it says that he has been online. Now if you have been dating someone for over 4 weeks is it a little weird that this person is still logging on to other dating services that she doesn't even know exist? does this mean maybe he just isn't that into her, or is still waiting for a better option to come around? I know if I met someone I liked enough to date several nights a week for almost a month I would stop logging on to my online dating profiles. Just curious to what you guys have to say.
TheyCallMeOx Posted February 8, 2014 Posted February 8, 2014 It is very questionable considering he's recently been online. I would say that "maybe he forgot to delete/disable his profile" but it seems that he's keeping up with his profile. I think it's a little bit concerning and it should be addressed. Of course, it all depends on the rate the relationship is going and their beliefs. If they both believe in taking time, they may not be "mutually-exclusive" despite the fact that they are dating. They go on dates, but they may not be officially exclusive. I would address it to your friend, and let your friend decide what to do. I wouldn't suggest getting too in between the conflict; just let her know what you saw, and everything else is in her hands.
initforreal Posted February 9, 2014 Posted February 9, 2014 I met my current bf on pof about 5 weeks ago. He hasn't been online since the night he got my number & I deleted my account. If it's been 4 weeks & they see each other that often he shouldn't be on there.
Ninjainpajamas Posted February 9, 2014 Posted February 9, 2014 It should be obvious he is still looking, but she's seeing a guy 3 months out of a 3 year relationship, so that isn't very bright of her either...but if she accepts that then she'd probably be the type to accept he's just looking on plenty of fish...which I'm certain he'll say is just out of curiosity.
HappyLove Posted February 9, 2014 Posted February 9, 2014 He's definitely still looking. But sadly this is the norm with online dating. People could be going out for months and unless they agree to be exclusive, a lot of the times, they will still check in online everyday. Another reason why dating online sucks.
Author luvlost88 Posted February 9, 2014 Author Posted February 9, 2014 Well oddly enough last night while I was on plenty of fish again my friends "date" messaged me hitting on me.. they had not went out last night. So he is defiantly still looking for something better. They have another date coming up this Tuesday night.. should I tell her? she seems to like this guy.
theodora Posted February 9, 2014 Posted February 9, 2014 Establish whether or not they have discussed exclusivity. And if they have, and he has told her he's not looking, you need to tell your friend ASAP as the first thing she will ask you is 'how long have you known this?' It might be hard, and she might be annoyed with you (sometimes people are when they are faced with a horrible truth) but IMO she would be better off in the long run for knowing this.
HappyLove Posted February 9, 2014 Posted February 9, 2014 Well oddly enough last night while I was on plenty of fish again my friends "date" messaged me hitting on me.. they had not went out last night. So he is defiantly still looking for something better. They have another date coming up this Tuesday night.. should I tell her? she seems to like this guy. Well right now it may be none of her business that he's on POF. If they aren't exclusive. You could tell her but she may shoot the messenger.
d0nnivain Posted February 9, 2014 Posted February 9, 2014 I would tell your friend that he's on POF. Don't make any judgments. Keep your negative opinions about him to yourself. Just give her the info but don't say anything else. If she talks be supportive but encourage her to be cautious. 3
Author luvlost88 Posted February 15, 2014 Author Posted February 15, 2014 I let her know, they apparently didn't see themselves going anywhere romantically and were just hanging out for the company towards the end.
WP4046 Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 he must have a lot of money to be seeing someone every night and still looking for other woman damm
WP4046 Posted February 15, 2014 Posted February 15, 2014 He's definitely still looking. But sadly this is the norm with online dating. People could be going out for months and unless they agree to be exclusive, a lot of the times, they will still check in online everyday. Another reason why dating online sucks. People would probably still be open to other options in public if there was no online dating.
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