movingonnow1 Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 (edited) I have been NC for over 7 months now. My ex girlfriend has tried to reach out to me via phone, email and Facebook. I blocked her number, blocked her email account and even deleted her on Facebook. I told her a long time ago to not contact me anymore as I need to focus on my self and that she is not my friend. Lately, I have started to hit a wall (more loneliness than actually wanting to be with her). A few hours ago I decided to look at her Facebook. Now, there isn't anything on there that could / will hurt me as 1) I Can't see any of her photos because she was deleted and 2) It is the same photo I saw over 1 year ago as her display picture. I know this is going to sound stupid but I felt this irrational feeling of anger right now. I just remembered how much she hurt me and all the games she played. I felt this urge to block her on Facebook out of anger. A friend of mine suggested I shouldn't block her as it may re-ignite the challenge for her to contact me again. He said to me he didn't want to tell me this but he heard from a few mutual friends that my ex would ask people who had me on Facebook to look at my profile to see what I was doing. I immediately deleted those people after he told me this. His rationale is that she isn't contacting me (hasn't in a really really long time) then it makes sense to just avoid it and not look at her profile again and that by blocking her it won't help me as it may make her reach out to me again. In a way, I think it may be me subconsciously looking for a way to show her "she was wrong and a bad person" because I never really got to say it to her in person. I just went NC and tried to move on. Last thing I want to do is do an action which may lead to her contacting me (b/c secretly I do want her to contract me) but I know it won't do me any good if she does. What is your opinions on this? Edited February 7, 2014 by movingonnow1
Musing Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Don't do anything. The best way to snub someone is to not let anything they do, or their existence, affect you. It's all about indifference. You are healing, but you need to totally avoid that she shares this planet with you. Since you're already doing that, keep going with it. If you feel you really need to block her than do it, but don't do it to get a response or make her feel bad. Do it because you genuinely want 0 to do with her and make her nonexistent to you. The best revenge is living well. One day you really won't give a damn either way what she thinks you're doing or if she contacts you, you'll feel no pain and no reason to really mind her. For the record, what you are going through is a part of the process and is totally normal.
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