rov Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I went on a date on friday with a girl I met on Facebook 3 weeks ago. The first two times I asked her for a date she didn't wanted to go because she was afraid of me because she didn't knew who I was. So I waited 3 more weeks and she accepted to go hang out with me, on friday we went for a coffee and we stayed there 4 hours, she only took her cellphone only two times to answer text messages, she was interested in all the conversations we had during the 4 hours. She had a dinner in the night that day so I asked her several times that I didn't wanted her to be late for her because of me and she said: No No, lets stay here for more time, it doesn't matter if get late to the dinner with my friends. I guess this was a very good sign that she was enjoying the date. At the end we kissed in the cheek and she hugged me. I waited a few days and invited to hang out with me on monday and she said that she couldn't because she had a dinner with her family so I told her that what about tuesday or wednesday and she said that she was very busy with work this week, I thought this were excuses so I asked her directly this if she will hang out with me again and if she said that she wouldn't I will not insist anymore and she told me this: This week Im really busy but the question is for you: do you want to have another date with me?, don't you think we are very similar in many ways? And I answered this: We are very similar in many ways and I see that as something good, I would like to know you more and have more dates she replied this: I have no problem, I think you are a good person and I have a good time with you but i think we will hang out as friends. I replied this: Of course we will hang out as friends, I don't know what else you were thinking. My question is: Is there any hope here?, or should I just move on?. Should I date her as friends and see if this can grow in a relationship? or it is just a waste of time?
PegNosePete Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 She has told you quite clearly what she thinks. Why don't you believe her?
Author rov Posted February 7, 2014 Author Posted February 7, 2014 This girl is 23 years old and is shy and has never had a boyfriend before.
ChatroomHero Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 This girl is 23 years old and is shy and has never had a boyfriend before. Just curious, what would she have to tell you to make you believe you were permanently friend-zoned? Is there anything she could say that would make you believe it? To me it sounds like she said it but you are not willing to accept it. It's kind of like saying, "I asked this girl to date me and she said 'No', does this mean she wants to date me?".
blackpajamas Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 This girl is 23 years old and is shy and has never had a boyfriend before. and it looks like you're not gonna be the first. just because a girl had a good time with you once doesn't mean she fell head over heels in love. you pressed her pretty early about more dates, she said no. regardless of her lack of dating history, she doesn't wanna date you. onto the next one friend. 1
KathyM Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I think you put yourself in the friendzone. Four hour conversation at the coffee shop? After the first half hour or hour at the coffee shop, you should have suggested going for a walk or to some other venue, and then taken that opportunity to build romantic attraction. Hold her hand while walking, maybe even kiss her hand when the opportunity arises or kiss her. Women like a man who is bold and romantic. You need to start building the romance from the start.
Author rov Posted February 7, 2014 Author Posted February 7, 2014 I think you put yourself in the friendzone. Four hour conversation at the coffee shop? After the first half hour or hour at the coffee shop, you should have suggested going for a walk or to some other venue, and then taken that opportunity to build romantic attraction. Hold her hand while walking, maybe even kiss her hand when the opportunity arises or kiss her. Women like a man who is bold and romantic. You need to start building the romance from the start. Is there any hope here? or should I move on, but i think that holding her hand in the first date would have scared her, she is extremely shy. Do I have any chances here?, how can build attraction with her?
Author rov Posted February 7, 2014 Author Posted February 7, 2014 If I waited more time to date her again would she still friend zone me?
KathyM Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Is there any hope here? or should I move on, but i think that holding her hand in the first date would have scared her, she is extremely shy. Do I have any chances here?, how can build attraction with her? No hope for this relationship, since she's told you upfront she doesn't want another date. And don't think that just because a woman is shy, that you shouldn't be romantic. Shy women like romance, just as more extroverted women do. It's time to move on from this woman and maybe do things a little differently for the next one.
emva07 Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 even a super shy girl with no prior dating experience would be jumping for joy that a guy who she hit it off with invited her on a second date and accept.
hasaquestion Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I went on a date on friday with a girl I met on Facebook 3 weeks ago. The first two times I asked her for a date she didn't wanted to go because she was afraid of me because she didn't knew who I was. So I waited 3 more weeks and she accepted to go hang out with me, on friday we went for a coffee and we stayed there 4 hours, she only took her cellphone only two times to answer text messages, she was interested in all the conversations we had during the 4 hours. She had a dinner in the night that day so I asked her several times that I didn't wanted her to be late for her because of me and she said: No No, lets stay here for more time, it doesn't matter if get late to the dinner with my friends. I guess this was a very good sign that she was enjoying the date. At the end we kissed in the cheek and she hugged me. I waited a few days and invited to hang out with me on monday and she said that she couldn't because she had a dinner with her family so I told her that what about tuesday or wednesday and she said that she was very busy with work this week, I thought this were excuses so I asked her directly this if she will hang out with me again and if she said that she wouldn't I will not insist anymore and she told me this: This week Im really busy but the question is for you: do you want to have another date with me?, don't you think we are very similar in many ways? And I answered this: We are very similar in many ways and I see that as something good, I would like to know you more and have more dates she replied this: I have no problem, I think you are a good person and I have a good time with you but i think we will hang out as friends. I replied this: Of course we will hang out as friends, I don't know what else you were thinking. My question is: Is there any hope here?, or should I just move on?. Should I date her as friends and see if this can grow in a relationship? or it is just a waste of time? Not to be a jerk, but... Nothing you have listed says that she is interested in you in any way. Only took our her phone twice? You probably get through dinner with your cousins without taking out the phone twice. That doesn't mean you're in love with them. The fact that she was interested and engaged in your conversations just means she has social skills. Nothing more, nothing less. There's one way you find out if she's into you. Make a move. You made a move and she said no. There. Now move on.
Author rov Posted February 10, 2014 Author Posted February 10, 2014 Tomorrow she accepted to hang out with me again but I don't know if I should take her to a coffee or go see a movie and then go to dinner to a restaurant, what would me more convenient?
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