ikilledacockroach Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Well broke NC yesterday, my ex texted to see how I was doing and I realized I didn't want to beg or plead or do anything to try to get him back! I was polite and that was it. Back to NC today though. Feels like I'm finally learning how to stand on my own two feet and there are bad times where I miss him but I've realized that I miss the person he WAS and only the memories of what we had but that I don't actually miss the person he currently is, if that makes sense. My ex-ex (the one before this one) getting in touch has really helped, as strange as it may seem. I remember when we broke up I was devastated. I cried, begged for him to come back, told him I'd change and only stopped when he told me he'd met someone new. But now I can talk to him and all I can think was what did I ever see in you and cringing about the way I behaved! I remember telling myself I'd never meet anyone as amazing as him or I'd never feel the same way about anyone else but I did meet someone else who I felt even more strongly about! And now that that's ended I know it's just the whole cycle of 'oh I know he was the one' and 'I'm never going to meet anyone else' but now I know it's just a cycle and if I've learnt anything from that last breakup it's that it's just that, a cycle. It will suck and you will feel like you'll never find anyone else, that you've lost your soulmate but eventually you'll wise up, move on and you will find yourself being able to talk to your ex with complete indifference! So fingers crossed, going back to NC. At the moment things have been going really well and yes I may find myself thinking oh maybe he just needs some time, etc. but I remember what one of my friends told me which was 'he chose to walk out on you and leave you crying night after night, even if he did come back why would you want to feel that way again, how could you trust him not to do it again' and I realize she's right! Why would I want to put myself through that again? Me and the ex did have some good times and I don't regret anything but that's all they are now, good times in the past and there are so many other things waiting out there for me. So I guess the moral of the story is it DOES get better! And you may not feel that way right now but it does! I've got to keep telling myself that as well! 3
crazybestie101 Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Well broke NC yesterday, my ex texted to see how I was doing and I realized I didn't want to beg or plead or do anything to try to get him back! I was polite and that was it. Back to NC today though. Feels like I'm finally learning how to stand on my own two feet and there are bad times where I miss him but I've realized that I miss the person he WAS and only the memories of what we had but that I don't actually miss the person he currently is, if that makes sense. My ex-ex (the one before this one) getting in touch has really helped, as strange as it may seem. I remember when we broke up I was devastated. I cried, begged for him to come back, told him I'd change and only stopped when he told me he'd met someone new. But now I can talk to him and all I can think was what did I ever see in you and cringing about the way I behaved! I remember telling myself I'd never meet anyone as amazing as him or I'd never feel the same way about anyone else but I did meet someone else who I felt even more strongly about! And now that that's ended I know it's just the whole cycle of 'oh I know he was the one' and 'I'm never going to meet anyone else' but now I know it's just a cycle and if I've learnt anything from that last breakup it's that it's just that, a cycle. It will suck and you will feel like you'll never find anyone else, that you've lost your soulmate but eventually you'll wise up, move on and you will find yourself being able to talk to your ex with complete indifference! So fingers crossed, going back to NC. At the moment things have been going really well and yes I may find myself thinking oh maybe he just needs some time, etc. but I remember what one of my friends told me which was 'he chose to walk out on you and leave you crying night after night, even if he did come back why would you want to feel that way again, how could you trust him not to do it again' and I realize she's right! Why would I want to put myself through that again? Me and the ex did have some good times and I don't regret anything but that's all they are now, good times in the past and there are so many other things waiting out there for me. So I guess the moral of the story is it DOES get better! And you may not feel that way right now but it does! I've got to keep telling myself that as well! Our story goes along same line..
jphcbpa Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 my ex-ex recently popped back up. one from 2 years ago and one from 7 years ago. weird how the universe fills a vacuum. Aristotle, “Nature abhors a vacuum.” 1
bubblesbursted Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 So fingers crossed, going back to NC. At the moment things have been going really well and yes I may find myself thinking oh maybe he just needs some time, etc. but I remember what one of my friends told me which was 'he chose to walk out on you and leave you crying night after night, even if he did come back why would you want to feel that way again, how could you trust him not to do it again' and I realize she's right! Why would I want to put myself through that again? Me and the ex did have some good times and I don't regret anything but that's all they are now, good times in the past and there are so many other things waiting out there for me. So I guess the moral of the story is it DOES get better! And you may not feel that way right now but it does! I've got to keep telling myself that as well! I was actually feeling down right now (another phase of grieving I guess). Your friend is right. Great Inspiration. 1
Author ikilledacockroach Posted February 8, 2014 Author Posted February 8, 2014 How long was the NC? Well not that long tbh! About a week and a bit? I've actually lost count which I think is either cause I've just got a really bad short term memory or because I am (hopefully!) starting to stop basing my days on how long its been since we've spoken
WYSWYG Posted February 8, 2014 Posted February 8, 2014 (edited) 'similar story here. I walked away from my ex last Nov. NC since, until I saw her a couple of weeks ago w/ her new guy who was a mutual acquaintance. Unfortunately, we all hang out w/ the same friends. She's not friendly and I got nothing against him. Strangely, I wasn't really phased by it. It was almost like a confirmation of an ending. Then I noticed the flaws in her that I only remembered seeing on day one. I'm also in good terms w/ an ex-ex from 2 years ago. That was a much tougher BU. Now, it's a platonic RS and much clearer why it didn't work. So just to reinforce that hope - "It does get better!" I still miss the recent one now and then. But anger has taken over the longing. I can't wait for summer.. Edited February 8, 2014 by WYSWYG 1
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