JourneyLady Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 I just got accused of being "rude" by a guy on POF. We had been chatting and it took him a long time to answer, so I just figured he logged off. I had to attend to some other things. Today I log on and he tells me I was "rude" and good luck! It wasn't like I promised to sit there chatting. After all, it's sort of an email system, not a chat program! You have to sit there and wait for an answer and do a refresh every time to see if an answer has come in. I only do that when I'm bored with nothing to do, which is rare. I was simply replying to his questions and when they slowed down, I figured he logged off. Actually it's good he lost his temper. I don't want anyone so quick to jump down my throat like that. Had that in last bf and not eager to run into that again. Assuming the worst is not a good trait with which to impress women. I swear *some guys think they own your attention right off before they've even met you. When I was in a different state, some guy saw that I was on when I wasn't chatting with him and jumped to the conclusion I was messaging others. I wasn't, I had just left the app open on my desktop at home when I went out to run errands. Plus we hadn't even met in person and he was assuming a relationship, which is obviously a red flag. 1
ms321 Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 I think you're right. Guys to get that angry for something so trivial as responding slowly to messages are showing they have no patience and generally don't make good partners. 2
pickflicker Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 Sounds like a jerk to me. I don't sit there and "just chat", I'm usually reading a book, doing some tidying, throwing on a load of washing, etc - unless it's a verbal conversation, I'm not just sitting there waiting for them to reply. Don't worry about it.
d0nnivain Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 I never know how to end on line chats. I usually "announce" I'm leaving. Perhaps he felt insulted that he was still trying to talk to you when you weren't there any more. Either way, his nasty comeback is a pretty good indication that he's not good BF material.
MissBee Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 I just got accused of being "rude" by a guy on POF. We had been chatting and it took him a long time to answer, so I just figured he logged off. I had to attend to some other things. Today I log on and he tells me I was "rude" and good luck! It wasn't like I promised to sit there chatting. After all, it's sort of an email system, not a chat program! You have to sit there and wait for an answer and do a refresh every time to see if an answer has come in. I only do that when I'm bored with nothing to do, which is rare. I was simply replying to his questions and when they slowed down, I figured he logged off. Actually it's good he lost his temper. I don't want anyone so quick to jump down my throat like that. Had that in last bf and not eager to run into that again. Assuming the worst is not a good trait with which to impress women. I swear *some guys think they own your attention right off before they've even met you. When I was in a different state, some guy saw that I was on when I wasn't chatting with him and jumped to the conclusion I was messaging others. I wasn't, I had just left the app open on my desktop at home when I went out to run errands. Plus we hadn't even met in person and he was assuming a relationship, which is obviously a red flag. He's crazy . Wasn't he the "rude" one first. In any case if it is not a chat but an email system then he was overreacting and I would have been glad he did so before we went out as I wouldn't be able to stand his attitude. One thing that irks me is when a man I barely know expects me to make all kinds of ridiculous allowances or attempts to "scold" me because I don't do things as he expects or is overly bent out of shape about things like this. 2
MrTurk Posted February 16, 2014 Posted February 16, 2014 I just got accused of being "rude" by a guy on POF. We had been chatting and it took him a long time to answer, so I just figured he logged off. I had to attend to some other things. Today I log on and he tells me I was "rude" and good luck! It wasn't like I promised to sit there chatting. After all, it's sort of an email system, not a chat program! You have to sit there and wait for an answer and do a refresh every time to see if an answer has come in. I only do that when I'm bored with nothing to do, which is rare. I was simply replying to his questions and when they slowed down, I figured he logged off. Actually it's good he lost his temper. I don't want anyone so quick to jump down my throat like that. Had that in last bf and not eager to run into that again. Assuming the worst is not a good trait with which to impress women. I swear *some guys think they own your attention right off before they've even met you. When I was in a different state, some guy saw that I was on when I wasn't chatting with him and jumped to the conclusion I was messaging others. I wasn't, I had just left the app open on my desktop at home when I went out to run errands. Plus we hadn't even met in person and he was assuming a relationship, which is obviously a red flag. The problem is that some people use the APP for POF on their phone. That allows them to interact as if they are text messaging back and forth with you. Ive been off and on POF and OKCUPID. Some people communicate by sending 1 message a day back and forth(email style) and some will send 30 messages back and forth like texting each other. The key is to communicate this right from the start. If I start communication with a woman, I always tell her that I'm not the type of guy that sends 30 messages back and forth each day. I like to get a quick feel for them, and go for the phone call as soon as I can. No matter how much people want to argue it, you cant get to know someone through texting or email. I have ended communication with women that continually reply with 1 word answers, or very short replies that offer no give and take. 1
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