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Posted

I have been living with my boyfriend for a little over a year now. We have been in a committed relationship with each other for close to two years. As of today, he has been separated from his wife for over 4 1/2 years. She filed for divorce back in early 2011. There are NO CHILDREN. They were together for a total of 6 years with three of those years they were married. The assets are minimal at best, as my BF owned the home they shared prior to them even getting together…

 

He still is not divorced. He did meet with the lawyer 2x in the past year but things are just sitting idle. They are not even on speaking terms. He told me he has not spoken to her in almost 2 full years….

 

Should I be concern that maybe he doesn’t really want to divorce her?

Posted

Perhaps. But WHY isn't it going forward? My divorce took over 7 years - my ex was unreasonable, and also had episodes of bipolar disorder. I lived with my g/f for almost 7 years, and married her as soon as my divorce was final.

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Posted

Should I be concern that maybe he doesn’t really want to divorce her?

 

If they are not on speaking terms, I would be more worried he's just lazy as opposed to holding onto hope he'll get back together with his wife.

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Posted

The thought crossed my mind that the delay in finalizing the divorce could be about insurance/benefits. If the divorce is final one or the other spouse could lose those benefits. That's a bigger factor these days, especially if one has significant medical problems.

Posted

It could also be a problem within the court system. Many politicians are playing partisan games with the judiciary & there aren't enough judges, although I think they are elected in PA where you are.

 

 

I would talk to him about when he thinks it may be finalized & ask what he thinks the hold up is. You can't pressure him. It's not a great idea to give advice but you can ask for information . . .just do it calmly not like an accusation.

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