Does my partner still want his kids mom? Am I being taken for a fool?

[Jessica2688]

Me and my partner have been together for 10months we recently split for 2 months as I found out he cheated on me on holiday in the first month of being together! My partner has 2 children With his ex, a couple of days ago his exs mom told me that while we were spilt he tried to get back with his ex. She was sorry to tell me but felt I had to know.

 

I called her up and asked if this was true and to know the details, she told me he was round her house all the time he told her everything that went on between us she knows every single detail of the break up and what he did to try and get me back, she then told me they were hugging in the car he grabbed her hand and kissed her, also told her he wants his little family back but she made it clear that she dosent want him back.

He used to tell me how much he hated her and she was nothing to him and would speak to her like muck when ever I was around, but when I wasn't around he would be lovley to her!

 

He told me the reason he went and confided in her was because he was in a bad place and he didn't know where his head was, but since we have got back together it's continued he has long conversations with her that he hides from me and when I ask him about it he says it's to speak to his kids, which I know isn't just the reason! He crys to me and tells me I'm the only one he wants and loves but I find this hard to believe.

 

I need advice on what to do in this situation I find it hard to get in my head why someone who apparently had no feelings for his ex would go running to her for comfort and advice! Am I being a fool or just being paranoid. He also accuses me a lot thinking in cheating he gets angry really easily and screams in my face in front of his kids! I feel so vulnerable and scared I end up rebelling and smashing things up this is totally out of character for me I'm normaly a calm person, he's changing me into someone else! Please help!!!

[d0nnivain]

I suspect that you are a rebound.

 

 

If what his mom says is true, that he tried to reconcile with his EX, I wouldn't stick around. She will always be the mother of his children.

[Ronni_W]

Whatever his reason(s), he doesn't sound like he's ready to be a good partner for you. Or maybe he's just not capable of treating you the way you want, need, deserve.

...smashing things up this is totally out of character for me I'm normaly a calm person, he's changing me into someone else!

No, that is YOU acting in an undisciplined way, lacking self-management. Other people can't make you act like that...and they also don't have the power to make you not act like that. Your behaviour is all under your own power, authority and control, in the end.

 

But. It sounds like you are turning into someone you don't necessarily like because of, as a consequence of being involved in this relationship.

You also have the power, authority, control to choose differently for yourself.