smint Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 Hi everybody, I am dating one guy less then one year.I am 28, he is 32. He is strong,responsible,organized,educated,looking good,has a extra good job... I am satisfied till now at some point, it is going very good between us,but there is one thing,I am sooooo tired of sex with him. He could have sex every day!!! And I started to freak out of that!!!Ok we don't see each other every day,he is coming to me on weekends,but the thing is that I work on weekend, and when he jumps on me before my work I get crazy bcs sex makes me tired!!!Also when I come home tired and hungry and just want to have some rest after work,he still thinks that i want sex!!!Ok maybe I want,but give me some break.I have to yell on him just to leave me alone. After some time I started to look on sex as obligation,and not to forget to say that I stopped enjoying at all,I am pretending all the time and I really can't believe that he still hasn't figured out that I am acting,just to finish it as earlier as possible.Once when I didn't want sex he started acting very angry and we had fight. On the other side,when I get days for weekend,he is ready to go with me anywhere,we go to beach together,to restaurants,we meet friends,we go out with friends,for my birthday he organized very nice small trip,or while I am working he cleans my home, prepares me food when I come,he takes care if I have everything in fridge... I read one book"act like a lady,think like a man",there it says that woman must have sex with her man,or he is going to another woman.I read some forums,lots of woman say that they have sex even if they don't want it bcs their men will be angry. Even my ex of 7 yrs rs told me as argument when he went to other woman"we almost never got sex". Sometimes I just want to be single again. Of course I want someone to share stories,to hug,to spend time together,but this sex thing started to stress me up. It looks to me that it is going to be the same with every man.
jaycee1 Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 Everything your feeling is very very normal. I think you would be surprised how many marriages and relationships are sexless or they seldom have it. Women view sex differently and in a way many times a tool to reel in a guy. After awhile it gets old and they dislike it or just too tired (especially with kids). The book you read was correct though, a good sex life is very important to a happy long term relationship. A lot of it is a mental thing though and there are a lot of books on how visualize it differently and get past the blocks. Also a bit of hope for you, at your age what your feeling is totally normal. Women don't really hit their peak til a bit later. In my 20's, sex was an obligation to me, now that i'm older its totally different. Just have to find a balance and hopefully ways so that you can enjoy it now.
Eau Claire Posted February 5, 2014 Posted February 5, 2014 (edited) My experience is guys get antsy and frustrated if they don't find release. This can manifest itself in other ways. Don't ignore their 'need'. Yes, 'the act' can get to be too much at times. I love sex with my guy but can do without now and then.. I just like a warm cuddle at times. My solution. Be proactive. Give him a quick treat in the morning, when he gets home, after dinner, etc. I actually make a joke of it with my boyfriend...I tell him I'm not in the mood but I know he's going to start groping me during a movie or flopping around when I want to sleep.... 'I better drain that weapon and bet I can do it in under 5 minutes. Time me'. Gets us both laughing, him happy and afterwards turned into a gentle pussy cat... and then I can watch a movie or do whatever. Anyways, guys can't help getting horny anymore than a dog can help humping a table leg. You just have to channel their obsession. Edited February 5, 2014 by Eau Claire
SmartDude Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 In more ancient times you would simply tell your man to find a mistress or visit the local brothel. This is how the problem of spending your whole life with just one person was solved.
Author smint Posted February 8, 2014 Author Posted February 8, 2014 Smart Dude hahahhahaha!!! Thank you all for your answers,yes it seems that all men are the same,horny like dogs, and it is so disappointing to me.Sex is sometimes very big price for me.Sometimes I work 12 hours,even 16 sometimes I stay at work,and then I come home,he attacks me!!! And why I should think about his needs? What about my needs?He even attacks me when I am sick!!!And there is no cuddling,just jump on me!!! Then till the rest of the month I am praying just to get period,not to get pregnant(although we use protection,but anyway),in a sex I don't even enjoy!!! This whole thing makes me crazy,I decided to talk with him and to confess,if he leaves me for that,I will be sad,but it can't go on like this anymore.I want someone,but I just can't worry about his needs,I am living my life for myself,not for anybody else.Definitely I will never get married.
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