JANIE2406 Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Hi everyone I met this guy online on a FRI. We have been texting for almost 3 weeks. It was very nice. We talked for almost two hours and when he walked me to my car he said he was very happy I accepted his invitations and that I was prettier in person then pics. He texted me next day with plans for dinner SUN night. We set a time and that is it. The day of our date I texted him four hours before our date asking to move the date one hour later. He texted "ya" and that is it. Two hours before the date he texted me saying that he had to cancel because something came up with his brother. I was upset but kept cool and told him that it was fine and that I hoped his brother was fine. He did not texted me today. I am afraid he was upset,but at the same time I do not want to play a fool and text him when he was the one that cancelled. Not sure what to do. He seemed very nice and honest in person. Link to post Share on other sites
Barbarossa Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Maybe he lost interest or found a prettier girl to go out that night. I would ignore him and see if he hits you up. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Thegreatestthing Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 How horrible,ya???? I'm not sure what's going on,you can only wait and see. Do not text him,wait for him to text you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayken Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 I texted him four hours before our date asking to move the date one hour later. Perhaps this pissed him off? Link to post Share on other sites
Author JANIE2406 Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 Perhaps this pissed him off? Why would he get pissed off? I had to pick up a friend at the airport and the plane was delayed. I thought his answer was weird from the beginning... "ya". This sucks so much. It was super bowl day. I wonder if he thought I was partying and decided to stay longer. At the end of his message he said "we can meet soon" and that is it. I feel like a total loser for even caring about this person. Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 If no updates in 2 days, move on... If he returns after that... you can take a decision to meet again or not... Maybe something did happen... have a bit of patience... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SYLLPalmer Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Maybe he lost interest or found a prettier girl to go out that night. I would ignore him and see if he hits you up. I doubt he found a prettier girl. He was retaliating. Don't give him the chance to hurt you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JANIE2406 Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 I doubt he found a prettier girl. He was retaliating. Don't give him the chance to hurt you. I did think about that. I am not sure what to do at this point. I usually do not like people I meet online, but with this guy it was different. He was honest about everything...no made up lines....no plans in paradise....no silly compliments. I am bummed. Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 I doubt he found a prettier girl. He was retaliating. Don't give him the chance to hurt you. If that was his reason then that's really silly.. Lol Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 I did think about that. I am not sure what to do at this point. I usually do not like people I meet online, but with this guy it was different. He was honest about everything...no made up lines....no plans in paradise....no silly compliments. I am bummed. They can be super amazing n then do the most awful thing .. You just wait it out.., Link to post Share on other sites
pickflicker Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 People cancel dates for all different reasons. Lat year, I had a date lined up, and the day before, my grandfather passed away. I texted the guy and told him that I was sorry, I had a family situation, and that I couldn't make the date. I told him that I would have to reschedule, but I didn't know when that was going to be, because you don't know how you feel about having to be 'on' when something like that has happened. Now, he may very well have thought it was an excuse. But too bad. The situation was what it was at the time, and sometimes, a person doesn't want to go into details about why they've had to cancel with someone at the last minute. I did follow up with the guy a few weeks later, telling him if he felt like a drink, I could do it, but he was no longer interested. Cest la vie. I did what was right for me, and that's the most important thing. He might be doing the right thing for him. And you have to respect it. Let him make the next move, and go on with your life. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ChessPieceFace Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Well, you moved the date before he cancelled it. I find it hard to blame it entirely on him. He may well have assumed you didn't care about the date / were playing games and decided to play games back. Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 The one time I had to reschedule a date - I called up the guy and said, I am very tired (it was a hard day) and really not in a position to go out. Am sorry about last minute because till now I was trying to pull myself up and get ready but my body has completely given up. I am so so so sorry, and if he can give me one more chance I want to reschedule to so n so date. He accepted my apology n we met up on that next date. I think my voice conveyed that I am being earnest. So I think people should be very clear when canceling and if possible tell an alternative date so that the other person is not confused. But hardly anyone cares about these stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Perhaps he completely forgot the importance of Super Bowl Sunday, and decided at the last minute to watch it with his buddies. His hand was probably tipped when you adjusted the time. Guys should never make 'new date' plans on a sacred sports day. Hope he enjoyed the game. Just wait and see if he texts; the ball is in his court. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 The one time I had to reschedule a date - I called up the guy and said, I am very tired (it was a hard day) and really not in a position to go out. Am sorry about last minute because till now I was trying to pull myself up and get ready but my body has completely given up. I am so so so sorry, and if he can give me one more chance I want to reschedule to so n so date. See this is the difference. If someone cancels and makes an offer to reschedule then it is generally a genuine cancellation, they really do want to meet you, and haven't lost interest. If they just say "sorry I'm going to have to cancel because X Y Z" without any mention of rescheduling then it's a blow-off and more than likely they aren't interested in rescheduling. Whoever cancels should be the one to suggest a new date. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Iguanna Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 I don't want to sound arrogant but if someone cancels on a date 2 hours before the date and he doesn't have a valid reason (urgent job to do or else he is fired OR death or life matter of a member of his family) I totally cut him from my life. I want to feel special, I want to matter and to be appreciated. No time to lose for guys who don't give me the appreciation I seek. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JANIE2406 Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 Online dating is awful. I just started and he has been doing it for over a year. I think some people have been burned so many times anything that happens is game playing. I did tell him my friends plane was delayed due to weather changes, but it was actually because her plane had to stop at Iowa to get gas. I thought he would not believe (because I almost did not) this and went on with the weather excuse. He did seemed upset when I asked to change the time. Also at the end of his message he said "we can meet soon". That was the worst. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Online dating is awful. I just started and he has been doing it for over a year. I think some people have been burned so many times anything that happens is game playing. Why do you think online dating is to blame for his bad behaviour? Do you think he would have acted differently if you'd met him in a bar instead? Link to post Share on other sites
Author JANIE2406 Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 Why do you think online dating is to blame for his bad behaviour? Do you think he would have acted differently if you'd met him in a bar instead? No. What I meant was it sucks for me. I do not know how to play games and it appears to me that all people are doing is playing games. I got divorced 4 months ago, was separated for 5, and was married for 8. I am re-starting dating and it is clearly not the same. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JANIE2406 Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 I got divorced 4 months ago, was separated for 5, and was married for 8. I am re-starting dating and it is clearly not the same. married for 8 years Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 See this is the difference. If someone cancels and makes an offer to reschedule then it is generally a genuine cancellation, they really do want to meet you, and haven't lost interest. If they just say "sorry I'm going to have to cancel because X Y Z" without any mention of rescheduling then it's a blow-off and more than likely they aren't interested in rescheduling. Whoever cancels should be the one to suggest a new date. But I am yet to meet someone who is so considerate about my feelings... I have been blown off without any warning... Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 married for 8 years It sucks big time. The main problem I am facing is, how nice and genuine guys show themselves to be and then few days or weeks down the line they show their true self and leave you filled with bitterness. Link to post Share on other sites
Iguanna Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 It sucks big time. The main problem I am facing is, how nice and genuine guys show themselves to be and then few days or weeks down the line they show their true self and leave you filled with bitterness. I guess cause they were not nice and genuine guys all along, they were just faking it to get what they want (sex? confirmation that you like them? or even until they find someone better) and then they showed their true self. Do not lose faith, there is someone out there who will appreciate you and he will not change after days or weeks. Be smart and have your eyes open. Don't get disappointed with some jerks. The good people are the ones we should put all our energy on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 I guess cause they were not nice and genuine guys all along, they were just faking it to get what they want (sex? confirmation that you like them? or even until they find someone better) and then they showed their true self. Do not lose faith, there is someone out there who will appreciate you and he will not change after days or weeks. Be smart and have your eyes open. Don't get disappointed with some jerks. The good people are the ones we should put all our energy on. Thank you Just having a bad day hoping it will be better tomorrow ... Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Not sure what to do. If he calls or texts to reschedule, see how you feel then. In the interim, lots of other eligible men out there so on to the next potential. Considering how recently you were divorced, no rush. Glad you had one good date. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
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