daniel Posted January 15, 2005 Posted January 15, 2005 Ive been with a lovley intelligent girl for a month. But I am woried that phisical passion is taking over the meaning of our realtionship. I want to talk and relate and im sure she does too, but we always end up getting it on instead of really talking. we never do anything public together like go somewhere and do something, we just go to each thers houses and talk for an hour mand have phisical passion for the rest. Is this normal? i really need to know, im not experienced in long term relationships.
Sarah12385 Posted January 15, 2005 Posted January 15, 2005 well do you *feel* anything for her? like....love? might just be a fling *shrug* have you asked her what she thinks about it? you say tho that u never do anything in public...is there a specific reason why you don't? i mean, of course if the both of you just don't feel like going out then, whatever floats your boat. just make sure she's not hiding you from someone else, not saying that's the issue, just lying it out on the table. but anyway, if you both truly care about each other and are happy w/how the relationship is going thus far, then i honestly don't think anything is "wrong" with either one of you, it's perfectly natural ~Sarah~
Author daniel Posted January 15, 2005 Author Posted January 15, 2005 im so glad you said something i felt a fool to post something without a reply. shes not trying to hide me i know that and i do feel alot for her and i think she kidn of knows that. I think it is love im feeling but im new to it so i dont know. it does seem very natral to jsut get naked and get cracking but i feel like its the main reason we see each other, love or not. can you still have real caring serious feeligns for someone and have meaningful sex as your joint activity?
moimeme Posted January 15, 2005 Posted January 15, 2005 One of the problems with interjecting sex into the relationship fairly early on is that it will take over. Once you have the first chip, you crave the rest of the bag and another dozen or gross more bags. You might try meeting at restaurants for dinner and try to manage to stay at the place and talk after dinner. Make daytime dates to meet outside or meet somewhere public and then do things in public view.
Author daniel Posted January 15, 2005 Author Posted January 15, 2005 what if we went to see a play first then went home or something?
moimeme Posted January 15, 2005 Posted January 15, 2005 Well, things like plays and movies don't really contribute to furthering the relationship because you aren't talking to each other or doing anything together other than sitting side-by-side and maybe chatting a bit in intermissions. You'd be better to go for a walk or a drive or something where you actually interact. You can even do household projects together - something where it would be too awkward to stop and have a shag.
ziggue Posted January 16, 2005 Posted January 16, 2005 Do you two know where eachother stand? Maybe that's the problem. Talk to her and tell her that you might want something more and just want to take it as it comes. Take the risk. You have nothing to loose. Do what Moi suggested take her out too places and places where it would be awkward for you two to stop and have a shag. . Good Luck. .
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