calisloki Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 I've been with my wife for seven years now. Married for one. She has been suffering from depression since an attack on her by someone we trusted last year. I've tried to do everything I could to support her to make things easier. Several times since then she has entered a familiar pattern. She's got quiet and withdrawn. I would ask her what's wwrong and she would say I don't see a future for us. The last time she said this to me before now I made a promise to myself. When she said it next time, if she said it again, I wouldn't fight it. I was too tired to fight it My wife feels that this is just a break. That we will meet on the other side stronger than ever. I think she's kidding herself. She's out a deposit on a flat and will soon be gone. I don't know what she's lookin for. I've asked but don't Understand her answers. I'm not even sure she understands her answers. I don't understand how I upset her but upset her I do.
TheyCallMeOx Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 Even on the reader's end, things are confusing. If she says that she doesn't see a future for "us" and yet claims to come back together stronger than ever, then I don't know what she's looking for. The fact that you just recently got married within a year is an indication that she was emotionally devastated from the attack. We really don't know how much an attack affects someone. Sometimes it can be life changing, I suppose. You never know what people are thinking or how bad someone is hurting unless they tell you. At this point, if you and her try to work things out...I'd suggest going to a marriage counselor. Perhaps she might need to go to therapy if the attack is affecting her daily life. At this point, hope for the best...expect the worst.
redbaron005 Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 I've been with my wife for seven years now. Married for one. She has been suffering from depression since an attack on her by someone we trusted last year. I've tried to do everything I could to support her to make things easier. Several times since then she has entered a familiar pattern. She's got quiet and withdrawn. I would ask her what's wwrong and she would say I don't see a future for us. The last time she said this to me before now I made a promise to myself. When she said it next time, if she said it again, I wouldn't fight it. I was too tired to fight it My wife feels that this is just a break. That we will meet on the other side stronger than ever. I think she's kidding herself. She's out a deposit on a flat and will soon be gone. I don't know what she's lookin for. I've asked but don't Understand her answers. I'm not even sure she understands her answers. I don't understand how I upset her but upset her I do. I'm sorry for you and her. You're too tired to fight it - how so? I agree with TheyCallMeOx - suggesting counseling sounds like a good idea, even if its just for her (and you pay for it) or just for you to show initiative. I really hope things get better for the both of you.
Inviv_girl Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 7 years of married and dont see a future? how come?!? If you say "you dont see a future" with someone means you dont want to have married life with them- you dont see yourself marrying that person, am I right?!? I dont know please correct me if Im wrong, anyone? But 7 years married and see no future? come on...
Kermit76 Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 Sorry for your situation. I only dated my ex for two years but she broke up with me once, almost a second time, the third time she did I flat out said I have lost this fight and I won't be fighting for you. She didn't like that. I also made a pact with myself that if she broke up with me again that was it for me. She fell out of love with me and was unhappy in life. I can't tell you what to do but if she is worth it hang in there.. If your exhausted and tired of the situation it may be best to leave it. Please keep us updated.
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