libertyme Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 Hi. I was dumped in a LDR 5 months ago. We went NC immediately. I never contacted him and vice versa. Last Saturday, he texted me, wishing me Happy New Year and hope i'm doing just fine. Should I be a sport and reply him thanks. but deep down it's eating me up. I try not to think and associate anything... I'm still healing... What do you think I should do? I know it's nothing special and I'm so stupid...
k10k Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 You're not stupid It's already been a week since he sent the message, so I'd just leave it at this point. It doesn't matter, and it won't change the "big picture". Once you're healed, you can return the sentiments and wish him on his birthday.
David87 Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 Don't reply to the text msg, it doesn't matter anymore. 3
Author libertyme Posted February 2, 2014 Author Posted February 2, 2014 It was just yesterday he texted me. I was genuinely busy and did not text back. But today i kept thinking whether to text back...but i don't have the courage. deep down i still want him back but then...i kept figuring what's the point? but what if i lose him forever? i kept thinking all the crap but i can't help remembering all the hurts and the dump speeches he said when he dumped me...
Inviv_girl Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 It doesn't matter! I know how you feel, but just leave it as it is... just delete the messages and that will help your brain to stop analyzing or tempting to reply whatsoever.. I deleted my whole messages on my phone, mostly from my ex- with the I love you's thingy etc, called me "baby" and finally call my "name" after BU - hurt but I dont want to see that messages ever again so I delete everything all at once and start a new life.
Author libertyme Posted February 2, 2014 Author Posted February 2, 2014 i'm really not willing coz this may be the only text he'll ever send me, ever... so many scenarios going through my head, the worst is just being friends with him, i think it will kill me, really for now... situation a : i reply and he reply and end. situation b : i reply. no reply. end. situation c : i reply. he reply. something. situation d : no reply. end. situation e : no reply. he texted again. something. by just these, i'm going crazy.
Shosh Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 I am sorry, I know how you feel. Been there myself a few times. Here is the thing though, what do you want out of this? Do you want to get back together, do you want to just be on speaking terms so that in the future you might get in touch again, do you want him out of your life completely for now? etc. And also, how will you feel if you reply and he does not text you back? Or he does, but with something that does not ask for a reply from you? 5 months of NC is a long time, but sounds to me like you are not ready to be back in touch with him. My advice would be to not reply right now, but circle the next holiday in the calendar when you might rationally have a reason to text him, and tell yourself you will contact him then if you feel more at ease about the breakup. What you probably really want to do (ask him why he texted you after 5 month of NC) is another option, but will probably not lead to a reconciliation either. Good luck!
Kermit76 Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 This scenario happened to me. She texted me a happy bd and I replied back. She texted back and forth for awhile. Nothing significant. She never asked anything about me. It set me back.
Author libertyme Posted February 3, 2014 Author Posted February 3, 2014 I kept wondering why he would keep my number? Why he would text me after so long? Is it for his ego brush, to appease his guilt? I was half wishing that i would hear from him again and that he would text to wish me and he did. So do you keep number of your ex and wish them? Why?
Inviv_girl Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 I kept wondering why he would keep my number? Why he would text me after so long? Is it for his ego brush, to appease his guilt? I was half wishing that i would hear from him again and that he would text to wish me and he did. So do you keep number of your ex and wish them? Why? Some people just dont bother to go through their contact on their mobile, checking which one should keep which one should out. Including the number of exes.. because it doesnt matter! It is only "wishing" text, it doesnt mean anything.. he probably sending it out to everybody on his phone contact!
Survivor12 Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 If he really wanted you back, he would have let you know, not send a lame Happy New Year a month late. You've made it this far; don't put yourself back to square one.
Winter blue Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 I kept wondering why he would keep my number? Why he would text me after so long? Is it for his ego brush, to appease his guilt? I was half wishing that i would hear from him again and that he would text to wish me and he did. So do you keep number of your ex and wish them? Why? It could be for both. By not replying to him you will make his head spin a little, he will try harder if he is that keen to reconnect. If not, then you know he could just be bored for the moment and protect your heart from being hurt again.
Author libertyme Posted February 3, 2014 Author Posted February 3, 2014 oh k, crap, i texted him back. no reply. now i regret it like hell. fine. I should have listen to all of you.
Winter blue Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 oh k, crap, i texted him back. no reply. now i regret it like hell. fine. I should have listen to all of you. It's okay, we have all been there, don't beat yourself up for it. Just learn and don't do it again if he contacts again. 1
melell Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 This happened to me in the months following my bu. I can honestly say that the hardest part was receiving messages from him, rather than how I felt after replying. I made it so it was impossible for him to contact me. I highly recommended doing that, save yourself the strife. 1
Author libertyme Posted February 3, 2014 Author Posted February 3, 2014 melell, i wished i learnt this earlier. you're absolutely right. The hardest part was receiving the msg from him. It drives me crazy and makes me thinks all sorts of things because i was resigned to the fact i'ld never hear from him again. after sending the message, i don't know what to feel.
David87 Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 Well at least next time you will know what to do.
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