melodybox Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 (edited) I know it's long and i appreciate you taking time reading it. Thank you in advance. I met a guy on Tinder app over Christmas and New year when he was visiting my city. He is 45 (I'm 32), divorced over 3 years ago after nearly 20 years marriage, 3 kids---8,6, and 4, working for an international firm and he travels a lot for work. We went out 5 times when he was here (sex on the third date and afterwards). We got along well eventhough sometimes I felt he was quiet. He didn't talk about himself much but if I asked questions, he answered. Last night he was in the city, at first he had a plan with his old female friend, then out of the sudden, he texted me and asked me to join them and we had a good time. I know most men use tinder to hooking up. I talked to many of them and I went out with some of them but nothing happenned until I met this one. Anyway, I thought I tried not to expect anything from it. Thought it was like a holiday gf thing and didn't expect to hear from him again since he lives 2.5 hours flight away from me. 3 days after he was back, he initiated texting me. I was surprised to hear from him again. We texted each other every 2-3 days. Nothing serious. Then we arranged to meet. I flew to his city. He picked me up at the airport, prepared a drawer for me to put my stuffs in at his place, took me to a concert on Friday night and a park then a museum on Saturday before I flew back on sunday morning. All the time i was there, He was very nice and very affectionate (even he was here). He held my hand in public all the time, sometimes kissed on lips. I thought to myself.. like you live and work here. you aren't afraid to see us together or something? but I didn't mention that to him. He asked what kind of food i would like to try. What I was interested to see, etc. He was very considerate. He could feel when i worried and he told me to relax and be myself. I felt he opened up to me as well, initiated conversations and asked questions about me a lot more than he was. He cracked up jokes a lot. So yes, we had a great time together. Also he cuddled me all night (no matter having sex or not) even I moved away when i was uncomfortable in the middle of the night then he would move close to me, asking what position that would make me comfortable and reposition. I like affection and I'd never gotten this much before. However, i sent him photos to his email on Monday and he replied he was working late and would write more when he had time but he never did. On Wednesday, i texted him asking how he had been and wish him good night. He replied only good night. It's been 2 days and i haven't heard from him since. I feel he is fading out and I'm thinking about moving on. Starting with delete conversation history with him and whats app on my phone so i won't get obsessed reading it and think of him. I'm upset it doesn't work out but this happens. At least he treated me very well and I'm happy I've met a guy like him. What do you guys think? Am i doing the right thing? Edited January 31, 2014 by melodybox
Grumpybutfun Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 The distance issue is unfortunate. What I got from this being a very practical man is that I wouldn't want to pursue or get my hopes up about a woman I only would be able to see very rarely. Of course, I could be entirely wrong, but most guys at some point think about investment time into the relationship and that may have been what he did after you left to go home. Maybe he felt himself starting to attach and thought that due to the distance and your separate lives there would be little chance of ever getting together together. Not sure if I made any sense, Grumps 1
PegNosePete Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 Yes, sounds like he is doing the fade, for reasons unknown to you/us. 1
Author melodybox Posted January 31, 2014 Author Posted January 31, 2014 Grumpybutfun : I can't agree more with distant issue. Eventhough i can fly to see him every weekend if it ever gets serious but it would be easier to find someone who lives in the same city. PegNosePete : i think so. I'm not happy but i accept it sadly.
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