Author WP4046 Posted January 31, 2014 Author Posted January 31, 2014 The text came across as rude. She might have been trying for humour. A simple phone chat would have cleared it up quickly. A coffee place for a meet and greet is perfect, or a bar for a drink. I agree that a fast food type of restaurant sends a mixed signal, namely: we're goign to eat, but it's not a *real* dinner. On a Friday night after work, doubly so. Even given that, her text came across as unecessarily rude. What happened? She has been deleted
FitChick Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 Don't set up meet'n'greets on a Friday or Saturday night. That is for "real" dates. Meet weekday evenings for a quick drink or weekend day time for coffee and cupcakes or Jamba Juice and protein bar -- depending if you are fat or fit! 1
georgecostanza Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 First of all it was a friday at 5pm which means it would have been done with by 6:30pm or 7pm. Not like it was a friday night at 10pm Great. So you're going straight from work I guess, not even bothering to change. She must have been thrilled. The place that we were going to served pizza and sandwiches and salads L.O.L. 1
Author WP4046 Posted January 31, 2014 Author Posted January 31, 2014 Great. So you're going straight from work I guess, not even bothering to change. She must have been thrilled. L.O.L. Change into what? I'm already business causal.
georgecostanza Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 That's not the point. The point is you've made 0 effort with this whole thing, why should she? 2
Author WP4046 Posted January 31, 2014 Author Posted January 31, 2014 That's not the point. The point is you've made 0 effort with this whole thing, why should she? Listen george We both worked in the same area so we were meeting up after work at a coffee house
georgecostanza Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 Listen george We both worked in the same area so we were meeting up after work at a coffee house You blew it. 2
veggirl Posted January 31, 2014 Posted January 31, 2014 You blew it. Many of us, women included, think he dodged a bullet. 1
Danger Posted February 1, 2014 Posted February 1, 2014 Good work in deleting her WP. NEVER reward $hitty behavior like that. Having said that, I have found the best options for first dates are going for drinks. It's easy to bail if she sucks and it's easier to escalate if she's cool. Going one step beyond that, I don't even ask girls on dates, I just tease and play with them until it becomes "their idea". That works way better than any other method.
georgecostanza Posted February 1, 2014 Posted February 1, 2014 Many of us, women included, think he dodged a bullet. I think they both did 1
Titania22 Posted February 1, 2014 Posted February 1, 2014 Ok, I agree that her message was rude. But can someone send me a link to this Cosi that you all seem to know about. When I google Cosi lots of places with that name come up, and so I have no idea which one you mean. I think if she objected to both your choices a better solution on her part would have been to suggest an alternative. A don't think have an aversion to certain places necessarily means being entitled, but her text definitely came off as entitled.
Trep Posted February 1, 2014 Posted February 1, 2014 And here I was thinking that a first date was about getting to know someone, not how expensive the food your eating is.
crederer Posted February 1, 2014 Posted February 1, 2014 one time I was on a date at a fairly nice restaurant. Nothing crazy but it was like total $120 bill at the end. It was a girl I was dating for a few months. There was a couple what seemed to be on a first date or an early date sitting near us and she looked like she was still in her late teens and him in his 40's. She looked really uninterested and my date was like "id be offended if I was dating a guy that much older and he took me to a place like this". "you wot, mate?" It rubbed me the wrong way, for sure.
Author WP4046 Posted February 1, 2014 Author Posted February 1, 2014 Well I told her she would have gotten a nice dinner if she ate it at my apartment and made out with me afterwards lol
BlueIvy Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 She was kind of rude in her post but at the same time, you are in your mid 30s, you couldn't do something that said you put some thought into it? It's not like you are 21, you are in your mid 30s! You basically said starbucks or cosi, that doesn't seem like a real effort made on your part. It's like saying I don't really care to make an impression so choose between these two run of the mill joints. You don't have to spend a lot of money, you could have taken her to a local restaurant that had good food for an affordable price. In my area, I know quirky small restaurants that have entrees for like $15. Either way, you guys aren't on same page anyway. 2
Author WP4046 Posted February 2, 2014 Author Posted February 2, 2014 She was kind of rude in her post but at the same time, you are in your mid 30s, you couldn't do something that said you put some thought into it? It's not like you are 21, you are in your mid 30s! You basically said starbucks or cosi, that doesn't seem like a real effort made on your part. It's like saying I don't really care to make an impression so choose between these two run of the mill joints. You don't have to spend a lot of money, you could have taken her to a local restaurant that had good food for an affordable price. In my area, I know quirky small restaurants that have entrees for like $15. Either way, you guys aren't on same page anyway. We talked last night and she said she only wanted a hot chocolate. So I told her I was ordering a pizza and wings to watch the SB and she wants to come over my place so she can get some Not sure if she is joking but in order for her to have any of that food it's mandatory that we have some type of make out session during halftime lol
Allumere Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 TOO many rules. Hi, you want to go out? Yes. Done. Don't care if it's for coffee or beer, a donut of 5 star dinner, a walk in the dog park of a concert, Monday, Tuesday or Friday. Nope, not desperate. Open minded.
snowflakes88 Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 Are you that Phillydude person who used to post here? 1
Danger Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 She was kind of rude in her post but at the same time, you are in your mid 30s, you couldn't do something that said you put some thought into it? It's not like you are 21, you are in your mid 30s! You basically said starbucks or cosi, that doesn't seem like a real effort made on your part. It's like saying I don't really care to make an impression so choose between these two run of the mill joints. You don't have to spend a lot of money, you could have taken her to a local restaurant that had good food for an affordable price. In my area, I know quirky small restaurants that have entrees for like $15. Either way, you guys aren't on same page anyway. That is crazy. Why does he have to put thought into a quick meetup? Does she like him or only what he can provide?
georgecostanza Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 That is crazy. Why does he have to put thought into a quick meetup? Does she like him or only what he can provide? Because he won't impress her otherwise?
irc333 Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 yeah Cosi is pretty much at the bottom of the spectrum. The problem is that some chicks won't go out with u again unless you spend some money on them the first date. The better looking they are the more you have to spend on date one. Well, to be a smart arse, you should come back with, "Well, if I take you to a "real" restaurant, will you put out?" And see how she responds. LOL That'll teach her. ;-)
Author WP4046 Posted February 2, 2014 Author Posted February 2, 2014 Well, to be a smart arse, you should come back with, "Well, if I take you to a "real" restaurant, will you put out?" And see how she responds. LOL That'll teach her. ;-) She actually wanted to come over to my place today when she heard i was ordering a pizza and wings for the Superbowl Do she really think she is going to come over and eat my food I paid for and now have any type of make out session???? lol
Danger Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 Because he won't impress her otherwise? Contrary to popular belief, women are not impressed by a man who feels the need to "purchase" their approval. Women are impressed by men who have the confidence to know their own value and do not find it hard to walk away from a woman who does not meet their needs. Why would you feel the need to impress someone? Looking for approval from someone is another way of saying they are your master. Do you really want a relationship? Or do you want a master? 1
Iguanna Posted February 2, 2014 Posted February 2, 2014 I've always hated the expression "he's taking me to a ....", like I'm a dog that he is taking out for walk. "I can't talk to you right now cause I'm getting ready cause my MAN is taking me to this great place.....". Have you put on your dog leash yet? I'd never see this woman again. I don't care of she has been nice the last million times I saw her, this text means that the way she appreciates guys is only if they take her to some good place for a date. Sigh.
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